I have been drinking for the past 8 years and I always told myself that I have it under control but as of late, I really feel like alcohol really has a hold on me. I go days without it but when i do drink, its excessive and I feel its really taking a toll on me. At the same time, I am having trouble accepting that I’d have to let go of alcohol cause it’s been a part of my life lately and I don’t know how I can deal with all the “lows” sober.
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What you just wrote describes me perfectly 5.5 years ago.
Getting sober goes far past “not just drinking”. We have to relearn how to live. For me, I needed help. I read everything I could on addiction and alcoholism. I lived on here. I also joined a recovery program. All of that helped me learn how live with lows.
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Congratulations! I know exactly what you mean. At first your mind is like where is that pleasure? What is next? Or basically in the beginning it’s like an airplane taking off it’s very rough and nerve-racking, but then the plane levels out, and it’s smooth sailing onto a better destination. The best thing to do is find some thing that gives you pleasure without drinking. That would be different for everyone. Exercise, hiking/walking, for me, honestly, it was going to estate sales looking for bargains on musical instruments. And some nights just go on lock down and watch TV and eat your favorite food. I promise you, it does get better! Keep coming back! Best wishes!
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The part of having to relearn how to live is what seems challenging but I would really like to give it a shot.
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What are you doing to help that along?
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I’m yet to figure out exactly how I will pull it off. I was thinking of getting into exercising just as a way of keeping myself occupied.
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Hey Mbani, I’m glad you joined us here 
there’s a fantastic community of people here that are walking the same road as you, so stick around. Strength in numbers and all that.
You described how a lot of people start out abusing alcohol. You might be able to go a few days not drinking, but when you do it’s usually a lot. What that is telling you is that you’re never going to be able to drink in moderation.
You need to write down your list of ‘whys’. What negative effects has alcohol had on your life? Finances, relationships, work, exercise, motivation etc. When you start thinking about it, you’ll see alcohol has a pretty bad knock on effect across your life. Once you’ve listed your why’s, then start working on a plan to stay clean. We all have different methods like meetings, books, podcasts, exercise, etc., but one thing is abundantly clear. You need to keep communicating with people that understand what you’re going through, and this site is absolutely perfect for this.
I wish you well on your journey, we are here anytime you need a chat 
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Thank you for the warm welcome and advice. I really need to take the time and reflect on the reasons why I need to quit cause when I come to think of it, there are no ‘Pros’ associated with drinking besides the obvious ‘Cons’.
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I am literally just starting my sober journey and there is always that feeling like omg, what I would do for a shot right now.
That’s my mentality, but I have to understand that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have been looking into local group meetings just so I can meet like minded people
Is there anything on your area like that?
Always here if you need a friend!!
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I am a big proponent of keeping busy. There is plenty of testimonials here about that. Exercise is good for mental well being. Will it give you the tools to deal with the “lows” in a healthy productive manner…thinl about that aspect. There is plenty on here to read that will help you discern.
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