Today I relapsed after 1 month I know its little that month was easy to be free of everything, and yesturday I felt the need and I failed
I feel I fail myself over and over again
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I have been here so many times. We are rowing the same boat together for sure…
You know what’s cool?
Despite all the failures, you can still succeed. It’s about learning HOW to walk through recovery, and you can find lots of knowledge (and support!) here.
Stay connected with us; try to read around here each day. You will get help and support, without a doubt.
By the way, achieving a month is huge - feel encouraged about that!
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Welcome 
what is your DOC?
Thankyou so much
I just need someone to talk about this my life is like normal I work every day im good mom I take care of everything I do it mostly to give me energy a little bit of power so I can get my chores done , but I wanna stop I know I can do it is just so difficult and Im afraid to die or fail me again and again always saying im gonna quit then a get this weird sensation and I need too 
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Its mostly speed and sometimes alcohol
And I wanna quit both I do alcohol like 1 a month but the other thing gives me energy that I need to get trough the day or its what my brain says I know I can quit and find energy in exercise or sleep better I know that
So hard
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Welcome to the community! I just saw ur post and wanted to check in on ya. How have u been since u posted last?
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Im still in it 
not sober
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Whats going on? Can i help in anyway? Feel free to share whats on ur mind 
I feel such a bad mom for doing it i dint do it always I have y moments how many times I has said im gonna stop and the again I fail im not sober 
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I can relate to that mom guilt. Its BRUTAL! But every day is a new day to make a fresh start. Try not to beat urself up too much bcuz all that does is feed our addiction. It wants us to feel like shit emotionally so that we keep using to numb that feeling out.
When i quit using drugs and alcohol, i had to get rid of all my paraphernalia, i had to block and delete dealers numbers, not have too much money on me at one time (so initally i spent most of it more beneficial things like stuff for the home, groceries, odds n ends etc), and i had to avoid my triggers (people, places, n things). I had to make it difficult to use.
What things have u tried so far to help u stop using? Nothing changes, if nothing changes 
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I dont know because I always have pause in between like 5 days using then 3 months clean and it goes on like that
I have always contact
And really I want to quit everything for me and my daughter ny family
Im always saying this is the last time I have been clean for 6 months but then relapse again
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Welcome to the community for sure!
And that is tough, I won’t lie, but I also want you to know that, the greatest part (as referenced from many members) you can pick back up and keep going.
Coming here and posting and acknowledging the relapse is something MOST of us did not do… I wish I had of back then.. but it is possible and it CAN be done! You got this! Just let me know if I can help you!
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Yes I would really appreciate your help been very tough because people that dont know me they wouldn’t imagine I am in all of this stuff and people that know I am say to me you dont look like you are in this
I want to quit want to be clean I have relapses 4 days now seeing using
I need help
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Happy to help! Feel free to send me a message!