So, just hit two weeks today. I am feeling quite good about this. But also, if I am honest, quite scared. Maybe this is something everyone feels, but I sometimes feel that I am building a shakey tower that will fall down. Although I am trying not to dwell on that thought.
I have found that apple juice (not fermented ), is helping me replace the fermented variety of apple juice.
One thing I am becoming more aware of, is just how much weight I put on when I was drinking. That is the most upsetting thing I am dealing with at the moment. I have got rid of most of the mirrors in my house as I really cannot stand the sight of me. I just have a mirror to shave in, but sometimes I see a reflection and it is horrific.
I can relate. I gained 100lbs. Knew after i got sober i needed to take action on my weight but wanted to build a solid sobriety foundation first. I didnt take action on a healthier lifestyle besides no booze until i was 8 months sober and felt it was time to shed sloth.
Dont be too hard on yourself early on. Focus on your sobriety utmost. In due time you will find the motivation
Once again, thank you.
I do feel quite ashamed at how I have let things slide, and I guess I want to get rid of as many reminders of the bad times as possible.
And maybe I am being impatient.
I very much remember that feeling of looking in the mirror and not recognizing myself and who I’d become. It was pretty gutwrenching honestly. It shook me to my core to see who I’d become. But, that also helped to motivate me to do better. I took pictures of myself in that state. I didn’t want to forget what I could have again if I stopped walking this sober journey. That has been phenomenal to see the differences now so I’m glad I did that!
I will say, I went into sobreity with the mindset that sugary snacks were better than booze and they absolutely were. But I am an alcoholic and I do those things to excess. That’s pretty tough on the body too and it sure didn’t help me lose weight. I still can struggle with sugar, so for me that’s one thing I try to be mindful of as I have those tendencies to seek pleasure in unhealthy places (such as food) from time to time. Yes, it beats the alternative but it can also continue to be a self-sabatoging behavior. I was gentle on myself during my early recovery days and took on that battle later.
For me, my house was also shakey. Until I joined a recovery program and really began doing the inner work. That’s where my old unhealthy foundation really began to crumble so I could take away those wobbly parts and set myself up on a solid foundation. That truly changed everything for me.
Wishing you well my friend and I am rooting for you! Congratulations on your first 2 weeks!
), is helping me replace the fermented variety of apple juice.
Oh lord, give me patience, and I want it NOW!