Hey I’m only on day 2 of my first sobriety challenge. I just remembered I have an event at the end of august that my mum booked and paid for, it’s up London and it’s a whole evening event & party with a hotel booked after. I’m trying not to panic but realistically what do I do? I absolutely have to go, but I’m worried I may get that far and then completely ruin my sobriety. Any tips or advice?! I know it’s early days but I’m suddenly so scared!
2 Likes
Or what? I’d rethink that phrase.
9 Likes
This sounds like a very slippery slope to be in honest. Especially if ur already feeling uneasy about it. Do u REALLY need to go? Would ur mum understand that ur trying to get sober and that ur fearful of relapse?
I would hope she would understand and maybe chatting with her would relieve the pressure u feel about needing to go.
If u end up going tho, are u able to leave early when others start getting too out of hand? And perhaps ordering a plain soda and having that on u will prevent others from asking u if u want a drink. Ive heard that works for others.
But in all honesty, i would really rethink going as it is very early in ur sobriety. Nothing is worth risking ur sobriety over 
4 Likes
No. You don’t.
11 Likes
Hi Dawn, welcome to the community! Congrats on rethinking your relationship with alcohol. It sounds like you are in the phase of wondering if you are an alcoholic. That is something only you can determine, but by doing a sobriety challenge for a month or two, a lot of information can come to light. Wish you the best on your journey.
Try to not worry about the future, live ODAAT. If you “get that far” then you will have had a long string of sober days to help inform your decision about whether celebrating around drunk friends sounds like something you feel safe doing. Stay sober today, check in with us tomorrow to commit to another wonderful sober day. You can do it!
4 Likes
It was booked as a Christmas present for me, I know it sounds crazy, but 10 years ago my older brother died, since then my mum and I have fallen out and now are best friends - having these plans together is so important to her. I know she will respect my choice not to drink, I just hope I am strong enough to resist it come the night. And also I know there are going to be other plans in the future, weddings, funerals, family gatherings which I cannot avoid, I just wondered if there are any ways people have managed to avoid temptation in those situations. 
2 Likes
Thank you so much this is very helpful. Well I’m on morning 3 right now, my youngest woke me at 5am, usually I would be foggy and grumpy, however I feel great! It’s made me even more excited to continue this journey. Like you said my outlook probably will be different come 7 weeks time. I just hope by then my willpower is stronger than desire 
3 Likes
plans can be changed, locations and events cancelled. take your effort serious, stay safe and away from alcohol. besides: drunk people are boring when you are sober.
5 Likes
maybe try ameeting might help
2 Likes
Hi there! Congrats on starting your journey ! .. I spent the first few weeks of my sobriety re evaluating how I looked at alcohol .. as in seeing it as the enemy and not in any way a ‘reward’ which has helped .. also watching YT videos on people that have stopped drinking reinforcing the message .. I remember doing the same thing stopping smoking and so far seems to be working with alcohol .. I just see alcohol as something that takes away from my life and im better without it .. ! Hope that helps !
3 Likes
No need for you to be your own enemy
Hit up a zoom meeting for a bit a few times be4 you go the the event. Study a alcoholic and see how passionate they are about quitting alcohol and drugs.
There’s a lot to learn in the meetings
3 Likes
What if it was the other way around, what if your mother was an alcoholic and you had paid for this for her, and this trip was going to harm her sobriety, would you force her to go? Would you rather she told you and you altered the plans in order to support her sobriety? Can you adjust, don’t go to the party but keep the hotel and do some sightseeing or something else sober and interesting, have dinner, use the hotel spa etc.
8 Likes
Its common to have these fears early on. These events are many weeks away. You dont have to decide today. Let it go. You may feel differently in time. Today just worry about staying sober. All energy now is needed to get away from your last use one day at a time.
5 Likes