might be triggering on saturday my moms boyfriend got in the shower with her against her will, they didn’t know i heard i pulled him out and started attacking him, i don’t really know what to do about that. i know it’s not right. later that night i puked, cut up my legs, put fishnets over them, argued with my old best friend, cried than went out to hu (sex is self harm to me) my mom said “your fucking up”. February 18 i saw my life before me on the way to the doctors, prayed saying “i’ll be good i promise, i will never be selfish, i’ll be healthy”. Trying to stay determined and warm hearted. Asking god why did it take me until 2022 to realize how i live is wrong? in my healing phase, block button, Picnics, sunlight, books, salads, water. Thinking about how my mother has bruises all over, cries everyday, we can’t blame the innocent bystanders for giving up on us, but i don’t give up. i barely said no to people, sleeping alone in my room makes me sick to my stomach. my memorys don’t feel as they are my own. I’m uneducated, don’t know how to keep a conversation going, my only personality is what’s bad for me. I want to become unrecognizable, fix my life, and be a positive person.
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@angelinee We are here for you ! You are seem and heard here ! I haven’t had to go through anything as close to what you have but I know that I’m loved and accepted by my fellow alcoholic/addicts. Praying for you !!
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thank you🤍, praying for you as well ! Everyone deserves their dream life, have an amazing day
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