So I wanted to share with you tonight as I’ve been doing a lot of reflection today .I’m especially sharing with those who are struggling to get the first few days down. I was there everyday .I’m coming up two two months sober now a milestone I thought completely incomprehensible. This was me two months ago I was MAD in every sense of the word I would talk to myself in oblivion I was hiding in hedges not wanting to be found I was PETRIFIED everyday of staying in a flat I’d had for a year because I thought I’d be found dead in it so I slept on the streets with the homeless as at least I had someone and they were the only ones who couldn’t judge me . 22 days I think I stayed here ,my neighbour told me yesterday that he thought every time he saw me come back that I might not wake up and that he’d knocked on the door in the morning to find out but I never answered. I had no electricity emergency cheap cider hidden under the bed (why I hid it I couldn’t tell you I live alone) but I had it in case I went into withdrawals I had only three glasses and one cup the glasses were stolen from pubs I never bought a drink in ,nothing to cook on or plates because I didn’t eat .I crawled to the doctors with jack Daniel s in hand and told him doctors thought I wasn’t an alcoholic .That doctor I believe saved my life he told me he knew I was and allowed me to detox under the supervision of my mother and gave me a two week prescription of diazepam he also told me I would be coming off diazepam as soon as soon as they ran out because I would not need them anymore as long as I stopped drinking. I knew the only way was complete sobriety and I was ready . I didn’t however know that I would ever enjoy life. I saw absolute nothingness but I did have HOPE and belief in that doctor and AA .I did exactly what he told me with no exception s because I had a daughter and a mother and sister who did not want me dead . I couldn’t tell you one plan or appointment I either wanted or was able to keep. .Today I have electricity , plates ,two cups (I never drink from the stolen glasses anymore) I have a gas stove a tabletop cooker and a microwave. These are the plans and appointments I have this week
:Monday …filling my fridge with food , beauty treatment, buying a picture I’ve wanted for two weeks, going to look at and hopefully collect a bicycle to get me in and out of my village then the most important one my meeting of recovery with FRIENDS (I had only my bottle and drugs as these before)
:Tuesday Dental appointment because I smile now and want people to see it and I want to be a good role model for my daughter , service at my home group
: Wednesday yoga for my poor mind that I’d shot to pieces
: Thursday meeting with sponsor and possible hour at the gym
:Friday seeing my beautiful daughter And letting her make the plans . I still spend a lot of time on my own as my isolation was so deeply engraved I find too much peopling difficult atm but I’m Alive I can see myself thriving not decaying and I have memories of yesterday not blackouts and terror . I also have no will to run the show anymore I allow things to be just as they are good or bad . Early sobriety is not at all easy at times but I do have true and pure serenity sometimes and I am grateful for life .I’ve not harmed myself or caused others worry pain confusion or despair since the 16th of July 2024 nor have I used my selfish or aggressive will to gain instant gratification. These things come to me now as they should and if they should .I’m grateful to my Higher power every morning for showing me these gifts and I’m grateful and indebted to this forum that I found on my very first day sober and I will try to always give back what has so freely been given me .THANK YOU all for being with me on my journey we can all achieve sobriety TOGETHER…. ODAAT
This is a great share! I’m so glad you are doing better, well done on two months! Thank you for sharing your story with us, you are an inspiration. 
let’s keep going forward together!
Thank you for sharing, @19801, yours is a moving story and it’s beautiful to read how far you’ve come!
Congrats on 2 months! Thank you for sharing Corine. Your honesty will definitely help others who are still struggling. You give them hope.
I’m enjoying watching your growth. You’re proof it doesn’t take long to start seeing the benefits of sobriety. The promises are starting to come true. Keep up the hard work. Happy to be walking this journey with you.
Thank you @Dirk , I try to keep it simple then my life doesn’t descend into chaos, just woke up from some crazy dreams after putting up that deep reflective post . Happy Sunday to you
Thank s @Lisa07 i hope my share helps at least one person struggling . I’m really happy to be on this journey with you to ,your posts and your sobriety are inspiring to me ,hope your enjoying your weekend 
Well done doing great Corine . this old guy got another year
and still have my preamble from my firs
t meeting
Wow that card s nearly my age 
big congratulations Ray. I’ve been waiting all morning to wish you well on another year down
There’s @Ray_M_C_Laren. I was hoping you would be here today. I’m celebrating your 38 years from afar with cake at an AA picnic this afternoon. Thank you for all your wisdom friend!
Congrats Corine! It’s such a pleasure to read and take in your journey and your progress. You / we are setting new records and breaking them every day!
And massive congrats to you @Ray_M_C_Laren ! I’m very grateful for your presence here.
No matter how many days, you are both living proof of the miracle, as we all are. 
