So I will be 30 days sober tomorrow which is my first time in 3+ years. I see groups out there telling ppl you don’t have to give up alcohol completely. You can drink in moderation just watch your intake, count how many drinks per hour, per day, etc. Like a weight watchers for alcoholics! My question is i usually drink 12% & escalate quickly from there and little spritzers like arbor mist or reds apple ales don’t phase me. Is it honestly okay to drink low volume alcohol drinks if it doesn’t trigger you to binge or should complete abstinence be key? I know it’s case by case but this group makes perfect sense for some one who just wants a sip here and there.
Just as a heads up — the answers you receive here are going to be pretty one-sided, since TS is a community focused on abstinence rather than moderation, and any kind of promoting use is frowned upon:
But there’s nothing wrong with asking and learning, it gives an opportunity for folk to share why abstaining is their approach, and perhaps even their own experiences coming to acceptance with abstention from alcohol.
I’m pretty new to this. I hv relapsed a couple times since I’ve started. Once was 3 beers, once was 1 bloody mary, and the other was 2 beers. Idk if its possible to become a moderate drinker after establishing you have a problem with alcohol. I am one who once hoped that was possible but I fear letting go of the belief of complete sobriety will possibly lead me back to exactly where I started when I decided to try and quit. All in all I feel this is a tricky one.
I’m going to say that u probably joined this community bc you may of had some concerns about you’re drinking rite? And by the sounds of it you kind of already answered you’re own Q’s with saying I usually go for the higher percentage beers and the lower percentage don’t even phase me. So thats already saying that u can’t drink in moderation if you’re not ok with it not " phasing " you. My personal end goal is not drink. Nor even try moderation ever again bc for me it’s never worked before, and I don’t believe will ever work in the future. I drink to get as fucked up as possible, and I’ll party by myself if I have too lol. I didn’t give a shit, I just wanted to get blacked out,that was always my goal. Also congrats on 30 days that’s awesome
I’ll say this.
- I haven’t met anyone who’s been an alcoholic and can moderate successfully now for any significant period of time.
- I see people on here time after time convincing themselves they can moderate, and later coming back here to try abstaining again because it didn’t work out.
- I personally cannot safely have a single drink. I lose control over it while thinking I still am in control. At absolute best, it might be one a week at first for 6 weeks, then one a day for 4 weeks, then two a day for a week, then go right back to binging. Or I might go right back to round the clock drinking on the first day. I’ve had results at both ends of that range, but never success. In contrast, abstinence has been successful for me for 515 days so far, so I’m going to stick with it. The longer I stay sober, the more I realize I’m really not missing anything.
If you don’t pick up the first drink, there can never be a second.
Hey, glad you’re here. For me, I did the “weight watchers-ing” of alcohol a ton. And sometimes I was actually pretty good at it. I could keep myself to x-amount of alcohol for a while. Then randomly a Saturday would happen or a week off or a crappy work day and I would go off the rails. Over time, that got worse and worse. When I put my foot down and said NO MORE, that’s when my life started to change for the better. It’s been over two years since I said no for good. Best decision I ever made. Hope this helps❤️
That is true! I have a new perspective since being completely sober. I decided against it, too much temptation. I know if i allow myself tht one drink, then it’ll be the whole bottle and then 3 bottles. I think just being completely dry is my only option
Thank you, that was sound advice!
I am not capable of drinking moderately, it’s all or nothing for me. My kids were watching Finding Nemo the other day, and a scene stuck out to me and I related it to my current struggle to stay sober… Remember the part where the Sharks have vowed not to eat fish, and the one tastes a drop of blood then goes on a rampage for more? I think (know) that would be me if I tasted alcohol, it would just throw me back to square one and undo all these days of hard work. I know these are trying times right now with so many of us having to stay at home, it’s been a real test for me that’s for sure. Here’s to all of us for staying strong, and looking to the future and how proud we will be that we made it through all this sober.
I’m glad you opted out of trying that route. I’ve been on this forum for over 2 years and I have yet to hear anyone claim successful moderation.
I have always ended up getting frustrated with lower percentage drinks. I used to drink alcopops where u can choose percentage as well as flavor. After a period of abstinence I was happy with 4 or 5 percent, then crept up to 9. And would be one can, then two, and so on.
The finding nemo analogy is spot on.
Ive been sober 3 years now and if i want to keep it that way, there is no such thing as moderation. Been an addict all my life. In my experience ( and ive been ingroups for 3 yeas) the addict alcoholic will go right back were they left off and in most cases worse. Alcoholism is a progressive desease and only gets worse with time.