It’s 7:15pm and I have just got in bed.
When drinking I would go to bed between 11pm and 1am, and wake up between 9 and11am. 2pm-10pm was my productive part of the day.
What do normal people do? Nothing? Watch tv? Scroll endlessly? What does a healthy persons daily schedule look like?
What time do normal people go to bed and wake up?
I don’t know how to be normal anymore.
I’m still trying to figure this out! I end up going to bed early out of sheer boredom. I’m not really into walks. I find myself scrolling.. glad I just found this app. At least it seems meaningful and not just doom scrolling
I cook, try new recipes, clean, go for walks, do puzzles, read, watch tv, talk to my kids, go for coffee with friends, listen to audio books, check out local events, etc.
As a drunk I talked about doing everything.
Sober, I quit talking and started doing.
I invested my alcohol savings to fund many hobbies.
Photography, painting, art, travel are my favorite sober past times.
If you’re new to sober life, maybe join a Zoom recovery meeting? You can leave your camera off and just listen. There are also a lot of sobriety podcasts. Keep your mind and body in the game, it gets easier! Also, just simple self care, like hot bath soaks, can be soothing. Take it easy, but take it!
What’s normal?
When I was new to sobriety I was on here a lot. There’s lots of great threads about recovery and just some for fun.
At first I took a lot of long angry power walks. 2 hot showers a day. Cried a lot. Cooked some nice meals. Cleaned a lot of house. I wasn’t worried about having fun. I was worried about not picking up. And I wanted to. Why couldn’t I just have one? Whelp, I could never have just one in my 40 years of drinking. Why would I think I could now.
You can have plenty of fun later. Maybe with your wonderful children you can have so much fun you’ll be tired by end of day and enjoy a sober sleep and no hangover. That’s fun.
Looking at my grandson and just being in his world not thinking about my next drink is fun for me.
Appreciating Mother Nature and everything she has to offer while sober is so much fun now. Flowers. Sunsets. Sunrises. Birds.
Now this… is such a valuable phrase!
i’m exhausted and tired from busy days and like to go to bed early as i’m a morning person.
if i’m not too tired i read, sometimes watch my favourite series, use the bonus time to get my house in order or clean, knit, i call a friend daily in the evening, my pets love some extra play & cuddle time, meal prep for the next day and a clean kitchen are nice, meditation to unwind helps me with better sleep after busy days, sometimes i treat myself to a manipedi at home and feel so fine afterwards, same with taking a shower and putting on a hair or face mask … the list is endless.
sober we have time to do all the nice and necessary things that got neglected and drowned in alcohol.
do something. no matter what, just do. and keep doing. new routines need time to build up. very rewarding.
So there is no normal but there are healthier lifestyle habits you can build.
I started working out. At first it started with longer walks, then joining a weightlifting class with my booze savings, then i took up running for a challenge.
What have you always wished you could do but were too concerned with your drinking habit?
I was on this app all the time in early recovery, building community and my support system. I started going to aa meetings. I got curious about who i was sober and tried new things i found on groupon.
You mentioned your funds were stretched and it was tough making the bills. Add your daily or weekly spending to the home page of the app and watch your savings grow. Dream up what you will do with the savings…maybe catchup on bills but then think of a longterm reward with the cash savings!
I’m not sure this is ‘normal’ either, did it make you feel rested and your best self? People who don’t drink do exactly the same or more as people who drink. And they do it better and quicker and probably with no regrets.
When I first got sober I asked myself the same questions because minutes stretched like hours and hours stretched like days. I had no idea how I was going to fill this newly expanding timeline of feeling lost. Because all I actually did when I drank was to project false joviality and security around awkward and sad situations. Getting sober made me face many hard truths: I was lazy, I was avoidant, I was out of shape and sleeping too little. I was avoiding pain and in a mental health crisis. I was in a job that I absolutely resented, being treated like a show animal and threw crumbs. Drink made me forget my own dispair, then created dispair which I drank to dodge. Etc.
Things to do with your time:
Read sober literature
Listen to sober resources
Engage with sober community
Attend meetings if you wish
Get real with your reasons for choosing sobriety
Explore your deep truths and the reasons you drank in the first place
Deal with your emotional needs
Go to bed early
Take up hobbies
Change your lifestyle, join a gym, climb a hill, swim a lake, play tennis… Whatever floats your sober boat
Personally, I kept similar hours to you when I drank. It was exhausting as I was in full time employment and that was almost impossible to maintain because I struggled to function with my drinking schedule as it was.
Now:
Bed by 9pm most nights, up between 5-5.45am. Gym class before 7am most days. I read lots, I do crafts, I watch movies, I socialise a bit… Just standard normal stuff.
Good luck, it gets easier. Stick with it.
Meetings, Gym, walks was working so my days were busy evenings i go to a meeting or gym play squash my weekends gym and meetings going out for a meal zoom meetings face time with sober people , going to a face to face meeting youl prob see people who have been were you are now make friends and youl have likeminded friends to share on your sober journey wish you well
How ya doing today @WickedWitchOfTheEast
Amazing!!! Just finished dinner with my family and getting ready for bed!! Day 7! I am loving sobriety!
A guy talking to me after my meeting tonight said something really fitting for this topic:
When you quit working out you have to find something to fill that time and when you get back in the gym it’s tough to get back to it because you’ve filled that time with something else for a while.
His point to me was we have priorities in life and if I wanted sobriety it’s best served as a priority I make time for in my life to go with things like my family, my baseball team etc.
When we take away the drug of choice, something has to fill all that time we made for it! The exciting part to me is that it’s our choice what to fill it with and there’s so many GOOD choices. Sounds like you’re finding your way 
I don’t believe I qualify as a normal person yet. And, alcohol is not my drug of choice. But, I am a recent non-drinker.
With the time I now have (free of both my DOC and alcohol)…
I’ve been reading books, doing puzzles, taking up writing again, and spending much time with this community.
I’m very new to recovery so, to be fair, I’ve been super bored and depressed a lot. But, I do try to increase these activities with the new time I have…
By the way, a quick dumbell workout (or a longer major routine) has been a great go-to for me whenever I’ve been really triggered or tempted.
Wishing you the best!
And, I’m excited to hear what you come up with!
Been sober for almost 8 years, I feel like im fairly normal at this point in my life.
My evening routine:
5PM: Done with work, think about dinner, sit on front porch a while.
6PM: make or go out for dinner
7PM : Post dinner walk (20 minutes), clean kitchen, dishes.
8PM: More chores, laundry, get kid bathed and ready for bed.
9PM: Me time, work on making music or making YouTube videos
10PM: in bed, watch TV
11PM: fall asleep…
3AM: Wake up, go pee
5AM: wake up again, go pee again. Lay awake, contemplate just getting up now and starting the day early.
5:50AM: Fall back asleep
6AM: Alarm goes off, time to get up.