I’ve been in recovery for 4 going on 5 years and the decisions I’ve made up to this point are highly impacting the future of my recovery. I have voices in my head I’m on meds that make me a freaking robot zero emotion except depression. My finances are out of control because I tried to help my ex get on her feet a long with repairs to my Durango. The person I love isn’t around anymore and now we hardly talk we have a kid together. I’m a single father full custody and I’m struggling to provide. My job is relentless with writeups and I’m not sure when it will result in termination. At the one year mark things were good I felt new to sobriety and trying something new I’m 36 and I used for 18 years all drugs. Now as I make it to my almost 5th year I’m burned out life has taken its toll on me and I see no solution that isn’t going to cost me more time money health and it’s literally anxiety depression stress to the max even living one day at a time with everything on the back burner it is still hard to stay sober and go into this storm head on I’m exhausted like where do I turn next?
Congrats on your sober time. It seems from an outside perspective that you’re looking at things too broadly. Maybe try to get back to basics and stay present. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate, can you imagine how much worse it would be in active addiction? You probably wouldn’t have your kid.
Welcome to TS Shane.
Welcome and congrats on your sober time. You have a hell of a lot going on there. It would surely be even more of a shit show if still using. But still, life is dealing you some hard stuff and that is difficult. I would put out the biggest fire first. Try to deal with one thing at a time. Research what help is available for you. It sounds like financial problems are a big part, I know in the UK there is the citizen advice bureau where you can get free advice. Anything like that where you are?
Not that I’m aware of I tried for government assistance but I make to much for food, child support, or financial assistance. I’m trying to do my best I just feel like my wheels are spinning and I’m not going anywhere.