What would the actual benefit/point be in me reducing my drinking?

Advice & Questions
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I’m a 33-year old male.
(Single | No kids | Steady well-paid job | Stable living situation)

I have been drinking (or rather using alcohol as ‘a tool’ to help with emotions I encounter) for approx 15-years now.

I would be classed as a ‘‘high-functioning alcoholic’’, as whilst my acohol consumption is extremely high (*currently been 2-6 units per day / for the past 300-400 days in a row)…
It doesn’t actually cause me any issues at all in my day-to-day life.
(If it did, well I would just stop drinking, as it’d then be causing me problems / rather than simply what it currently is, a tool which softens life’s sharp-edges slightly)

I am aware that ‘‘medically’’ my alcohol-consumption rate is probably gonna result in me dying 5-10 years earlier than I otherwise would do…
But tbh I would 100% much prefer to die in my 60s/70s (but have enjoyed my day-to-day life as much as possible / softened any sharp-edge emotions I faced during life) VS die in my 70s/80s (but have had to endure all those sharp-edge emotional phases raw :: purely to scrape an extra 5-10 years into my old-age life).

But the reason I have created this account + typed-up this topic is because I genuinely would like to try finding-out if (what) the ACTUAL benefit/point would be if I reduced my alcohol consumption??

As currently the notion of reducing my drinking provides extremely minimal benefits:
May live 5-10 years longer (thus die in my 80s / rather than my 60s or 70s)

But there literally seems to be no other benefit vs the massive amount of ‘‘less goodness’’ that’d be required to achieve that.

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You have every right to feel this way and believe that to be true. I’m positive your life thus far has not shown you any evidence to the contrary. From that vantage, it would not make sense for you to think otherwise.
But here’s the thing: you’re actually EXACTLY where nearly every other alcoholic -who’s hit rock bottom- was, right before the sh:t hit the fan. What you are saying to us it’s straight outta the text books: verbatim.

I felt exactly the same way for about 20 years.
“I was a drinker but not an alcoholic.” And, much like yourself, the alcohol was a tool to soften the edges and make the world around me more palatable. Over time I came to trust the alcohol and eventually it became a nightly routine. I don’t know when it happened, but at a certain point, alcohol became a significant part of my personal identity. It became an inextricable component of what made me “Me”. (And this happened YEARS before anything bad ever happened as a result of drinking)

Without really knowing it, over time, you are incrimentally shifting the balance of power away from yourself and over to alcohol. This is not something that happens exclusively in ones mind; it happens all over your body as well. This is not something we can control or even monitor really but it is a biological certainty. The more you drink, the more control you give the drug. And, once it has you, once you can’t stop on your own, that’s when all the benefits you’ve come to enjoy will slip through your fingers like grains of sand.

Alcohol is not a tool. It’s more like a crutch that slowly robs you of all your muscle strength and once you are too weak to stand on your own, the crutch turns to paper and crumples to the ground.
In our desperation, many of us will try to refold it back into our trusty crutch but it will never be what it once was. It’ll never carry us to where we wanna go.

For centuries, humans have been trusting, and getting betrayed by, this incidious drug. It’s a cunning adversary and it’s had a lot of time to practice.
Right now, it’s beating you, my friend.
I truly hope you never discover the truth of what I’m saying.

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Alcoholism is a progressive disease…it gets worse over time

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Um. It could be as simple as why not try something different. :sparkles:

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Nothing anyone of us can say is going to change your mind. If you don’t want to stop drinking and you think the risk you take is acceptable, fine. Your life, your choice. Still I’m going to make a few remarks, if not for you, than ,maybe for myself and the other ones here who do feel that alcohol is not doing them any good.

This is not a pissing match. People’s bodies and minds have totally different reactions to consuming alcohols. 6 Units a day is too much for anybody’s health, but I wouldn’t call your consumption extremely high at the moment. But that can change and probably will.

Toleration to alcohol’s effects builds over time and use. When you use alcohol as a tool indeed you are an alcoholic, and you will need more to reach the same effect. 100% Sure of that. The toxicity of alcohol remains the same though, so over time you will damage your body and mind ever more severe.

That could or could not be true. And at 33 I understand you don’t care about that. However, there’s some very nasty diseases that are caused by prolonged alcohol consumption. Lots of 'm. It’s not the fact that you die younger, it’s how you die. At 60 or 70. Or earlier or later. Or not die but wither away over decades.

You’re an alcoholic by your own admission. An alcoholic can’t reduce his alcohol consumption. All we can do is quit. Or continue drinking and continue to dig our own hole ever deeper.

Whatever you do, all success with your life friend. I decided to quit drinking but it took me another 20 years after my 33rd to make it happen. I was in denial back then, more than you as I didn’t see myself as an addict. So I know where you’re at. And I’m lucky to be alive now, at 57.

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As for the benefits:
Results may vary, but the overwhelming consensus is that damn dear everything gets better with sobriety. Especially if a person’s been drinking for a long time.

Most people in recovery report:

Better quality sleep - which literally benefits every single thing about you.

Higher energy levels throughout the day.

Sharper memory, both short term and long.

Clarity of thought and decision making

Lower blood pressure

Healthier glucosamine levels

Lower anxiety (ironically)

And of course higher libido/sexual stamina.

The question of why we should get sober is NOT one of how LONG we want to live but rather of what QUALITY of life we want to have during those years.

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Man I absolutely identify with you and you’re thoughts. There was a time when I was a functioning addict/alcoholic till 28 I lost full control and fucked everything off in my life. It’s really difficult to be convinced of anything possibly getting any better while still in active addiction. I can definitely recall feeling like shit the sooner I die the better tbh who the hell wants to live to be old as shit reality fuckin sucks. Today it’s not like that for me though thankfully.

For myself if I would have just stopped drinking and using by myself which I did try did not last to long because I couldn’t deal with life in general. I didn’t have any healthy ways of dealing with life on lifes terms. All I can say is for me I’m grateful I found N.A. & A.A. and work it to the best of my ability because that’s what’s teaching me how to live on a day to day basis. With 8 months so far the benefits are things I can’t explain to you you truly would have to do the work and experience it for yourself. In the end my life is so much better today and I wanna live a long happy life & as old as possible with the experience I’m having in sobriety. Give yourself a chance and try something different.

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I think the problem lies in that often when people are in active addiction they think there is no quality without the drinking, i know i had that mindset before i quit … boy was i wrong

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Man im so glad to see you here Anthony!! Ive missed you, so happy to see how amazing your doing too :muscle::blush:

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Aw thanks :people_hugging: missed you too glad to see you.

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SAME HERE
I remembering many times being unable to fathom NOT drinking. It wasn’t even an option in my mind.
Honestly, it wasn’t until I realized that I knew NOTHING about sobriety, that I finally had what I needed to get sober. It was THAT curiosity that made those first few months possible. I remember it was like an experiment. :sweat_smile:

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Gdamn Menno,
I miss you brother.

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The feeling is mutual sir. But always great to see you around.

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I actually completely understand this and I was chatting to someone yesterday about exactly this. Because I had been drinking so consistently, and for so long, I honestly had no idea that my previous “standard” health (what i just assumed was normal for everyone) was so poor. It wasn’t until i was 6-12months sober that i started to understand that most people (people who dont drink) just don’t have those issues.

You just dont realise it because alcohol makes you desensitised…you just accept it as age or catching a cold or wear and tear…its not…it’s the drink.

Your skin suddenly changes colour and you realise you’ve actually got a built-in primer and foundation. You start to realise you’re much less tired at times where when you were drinking, you were exhausted. You’re less emotional, cope better, less inclined to lose your temper. You start to realise that all those things you were super sensitive about just dont bother you any more. Its so eye-opening and you end up looking around you and saying…“what? Is this how everyone else feels normally too!!!”

Its incredible. Life changing.

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Hello everyone, and thanks for all the replies.
(I have read them all | Plus will ‘relfect’ on them over the coming days)

In answer to some of them / This message which I’m replying directly to though:

• The notion of being ‘‘a true alcoholic’’ (someone who would severely struggle to function emotionally without alcohol)… Just doesn’t actually bother or phase me at all tbh, let alone panic/scare me.

I don’t meant that in a ‘‘combative tone’’ at all…
Instead it’s simply that out of all the things in the world I could be/that could be inflicting me, simply being an individual who is ‘‘heavily dependent on alcohol to function smoothly inside their own mind vs the amount of dependence other people have on it’’, just isn’t exactly a big deal in any way to me.

• I have been to extremely low places (*dozens/if not hundreds times before), and so my drinking during those times adjusted accordingly (during the worst phases a 1litre bottle of whiskey was lasting me 2-3 days at best)… ect

I’m fortunately currently (and for the past few years) in a place whilst where I do have many ‘‘life issues’’ which I wish were different…
I have just learnt to accept the reality :: Rather than dwelling on things outside off my control, and then feeling depressed/miserable about them, like I spent 10-15 years of my life doing.

But so it’s not a case of that ‘‘I’m on the edge of becoming homeless, spirarlling downwards, and unless I stop drinking I will experience some sort of disaster’’…
As I have already crashed into those dark caves of misery (many times before) | But my life now is currently massively massively better vs how it was back then (5-10 years ago), plus not operating along those same sort of ‘‘lifestyle pathways’’ which made me vulnerable to those sort of sadness & losses.

• In the spirit of honestly (most importantly honesty to myself), I am fully aware that IF/WHEN I do try to simply just go 1 entire evening without drinking (let alone trying to even fathom an entire 1 week)…
It is a severe struggle! :confused:

So I am fully aware that I am ‘‘an alcoholic’’ (by any reference)…
My issue though quite simply is to motivate myself to ‘‘stop being one’’, I would need to ofcourse understand what actually would be so much better for my day-to-day life if I stopped drinking vs how it is now?

I mainly drink in the evenings due to feeling mildly empty/hollow inside;
Which I could ofcourse just ignore/put up with… Yet it seems foolish why I should spend an entire evening of my life, which I will never get back, feeling those sort of emotions :: When I could simply just have a few beers, and not feel them?

(The end result will still be the same, I will die one day no matter what | But so having been sober for that evening wouldn’t of achieved anything at all, simply made 1 of my life-days less pleasant vs how I would’ve been if I’d had a few beers)

• I do understand that for some (perhaps most of you) the label of being ‘‘an alcoholic’’ is something which you find upsetting/unpleasant to accept, and thus your motivation to stop drinkining (or even just reduce it) was because you felt strongly a desire to ‘‘not be controlled/influenced by a need for alcohol’’.

For me personally though being ‘‘an alcoholic’’ is quite simply just ‘‘as bad’’ as being ‘‘a middle-income earner’’ / an unmarried man in their 30s / a merely average price car driver’'… ect
(Not my ideal fantasty - But not exactly something which I would feel sad or upset about)

• I started going to the gym aged 14/15 because I had a motivation to do that.
My motivation was that I wanted to have a strong muscley body… But so to do that I had to endure going to then gym 3-4x per week.

No matter how tired I felt / How little I was in the mood to do it / How cold & rainy it was outside my warm house…
What motivated me to still push/force myself to get dressed & travel to the gym every day/week was the knowledge of the fact that if I didn’t go, my body wouldn’t be muscley / but so if I wanted to achieve that goal body I physically had to get myself inside the gym that frequently.

(No especially motivated for the gym anymore just to say, as now I’m in my mid 30s, having a sexy muscley body means less to me vs when I was an 18-year old lad!) haha

However my motivation to do something was only ever because like with that example, if I did not do it, the result would be extremely negative for my day-to-day life (having a skinny small body if I didn’t go gym / having no money if I didn’t go to work / having no ££ savings if I didn’t save-up money)… ect

But with reducing/stopping drinking, I personally am struggling to see what the actual end benefit will be, that would crucially need to outweigh all the struggle & strain required daily, to make it net worth it? :confused:

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Thankyou for taking the time to write this post. :pray:

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Your writings here remind me of how i felt, about 10 years before I quit drinking. I was in much the same place. Drinking eventually spiraled out of control. It took its time…but it happened. It ended with a loaded gun in my mouth. I guess it finally caught up to me…i was lucky…

Benifits…there is no term of measurement how much better my life is.

You will make up your own mine, May I suggest, do a lot of reading on here. You will find plenty of i formation on what drinking leads to and what sobriety leads too.

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I won’t tell you you should stop drinking. Anyone who said that to me a few years ago was talking to a wall. I had a good job, worked out every day, kept up with my chores, and took care of my family. So it was okay that I drank bc it didn’t get in the way of anything. Deep down inside I always knew I was an alcoholic. Had no trouble admitting it. I just really didn’t care.

Even after my second DWI, which was 2 felony counts, and I was put on probation with an alcohol ankle monitor and ignition interlock device in my car, I had no desire to quit. Believe me when I tell you my first stop was the liquor store the second that thing came off my ankle. Obviously by this point my life had become unmanageable. I just couldn’t see it thru the blur.

I was 32 when I was released from probation. Very shortly after my body started failing me, and I could see how it was affecting everything in my life negatively. I was able to quit for a few months, with the help of this place and finding AA, but then covid happened. As soon as that voice had a window, and convinced me one drink was okay, I was immediately back to where I left off. Everything turned ugly once again.

This time, however, quitting took A LOT longer. And I desperately wanted to stop but I just couldn’t. I watched every aspect of my life turn to shit, and still reached for that bottle. After three more years my body was shutting down again. It was rejecting the usual amount I had consumed. I physically could not swallow it. Everything inside me hurt. I was lucky to make it off the couch without a drink first.

So my choice here was keep it up and be dead by 40, or put it down and do whatever it takes to avoid it the rest of my life (which I’m sure is many years shorter than it should be now)

You’re on this site, asking others views on the situation. In the end you’re the only one who can make this decision. Personally I don’t recommend waiting to ‘see how it goes’ bc I know it’s nowhere good.

Good luck to you friend. We’re here if you need us :heart:

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Carry on then. If you don’t see a benefit in stopping drinking, then you never will have the desire or the will power to stop.

This is a soberiety forum tho, so you may want to go to a drinkers forum instead?

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I used to drink strategically.
It just made sense because the results were a net positive. There were about 5 or 6 specific things I used alcohol to remedy, similar to how you’re using it now.
These were mostly issues that had plagued me since adolescence.

When I got sober at age 38
One by one
Every problem I used alcohol to solve
Vanished

Now, to be fair, I ALSO entered into substance abuse counseling. I went to an intensive outpatient program.
But between staying clean and working on my inner issues, literally EVERY problem that I used alcohol to solve was no longer a problem.

Like many others who went before me, you might also find that you ARE fully capable of enjoying yourself and easily handling those unwanted feeling, without the use of alcohol.

Honestly, I would encourage you to entertain the possibility that your drinking is contributing to those problems that you believe it’s relieving you of.

Just consider it.
Find the curiosity within yourself to keep this line of inquiry going. There’s a reason why we all kinda say the same thing, regardless of where in the world we are.

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