Wow. Thank you for taking the time to share all of this. Super helpful. Thank you!
Thank you to everyone for offering your support. Iāve read some really helpful tips and encouragement. I feel a lot more hopeful today than yesterday. Had my meds adjusted, agreed to start working with a sponsor and am going to commit to being around recovery friends beginning on Friday through the weekend.
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āWhy even tryā
Thatās a damn good questionā¦ one I find myself asking sometimes too. Honestly I ask it a lot (not just in regards to sobriety) and at times I feel like this dude
Meet sisyphus. He cheated death and Zeus got mad so heās condemned to push a Boulder for all of eternity. When he reaches the top it rolls back down. Repeat foreverā¦And Nobody gives a fuck
But Iām not sisyphus and nor are you! First off you, me and almost everyone on this app shares this seemingly pointless struggle so we are not alone like he is and this commonality creates ties to each other where I can honestly say Iām rooting for you, a stranger. Another difference is that we are not condemned!! ā¦ but boy it feels like it sometimes, Like I feel Iām not smart enough or strong enough or built right to succeed and be normal, but there was no gavel banged and sentence handed out! No there wasnāt. Which means that even if it takes 100,000 tries to get it right it can be done. Sure 99,999 times that Boulder rolls right back to day one with the only change being a weakened sense of confidence in ourselves and worse public image, but that 100000th time is so glorious it makes all the other attempts a blueprint for success.
It feels pointless and hopeless until we give up all negative ideas on our destiny.
You are not sisyphus.
You are not condemned.
You are not alone.
You are loved.
You can change.
When you change your life it will be glorious.
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