Iam a drug addict and have been for years. Righy now iam losing everything my kids were removed from my home . I have a chance to get them home but i still have not quit using my husband is on the verge of divorcing me and iam still using. Why is it so hard?
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There’s a combination of reasons. One of them is that addiction is not about willpower. It’s not about choice. It’s not like choosing what kind of coffee to get, or if you get a coffee at all. I don’t have to buy a coffee on the way to work; I choose to get one (or not). Addiction is not like that. Addiction is not about choosing. Addiction is not about willpower.
Have you tried some group work or recovery programs? What kind of stuff / systems have you tried so far?
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I just wanted to say welcome. Anyways, I can relate to your share. Using despite my attempts to stop and knowing how it affects me and my family. I hope you give yourself a chance to stick around and know everyone here. There’s a lot a great support and tools one can obtain here. Thanks for sharing
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Please, take a look around. You are with friends. Our kids are the most important thing. Please fight.
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Welcome Heather!
No one can make you stop using. Not your kids or husband. You got to want it for yourself. I was deep into addiction myself. I was playing Russian roulette every single time I used fentanyl and cocaine. It takes only one time and I could have left my child motherless but I didn’t care. All I wanted was that next fix. Using daily was exhausting. Everything I did revolved around it. Finally, something clicked and I did care. I wanted a better life for me and my family. But asking for help was so fucking hard. I had to swallow my pride and ended up in an outpatient detox. In the end, it was the best decision I made.
I hope that day comes when you want a better life too. We’re here for you when you’re ready.
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Welcome, Heather. Glad you are here. You’ve already gotten good advice here. Get the help you need to quit. The sooner the better. You deserve a better life and it’s gonna take a lot of hard work to get there. There’s no way around that fact. You brave for reaching out and taking this important step. Keep going. 
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Maybe try ameeting might help you get back on track ,for me i couldnt do this myself needed like minded people round me wish you well
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the day will come - for sure
and then you will be ready for a new life
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How are you doing today? Has anything changed for you?
We can’t stop because we are ADDICTS. For me, I wouldn’t never stopped. But I killed someone because of my addiction; and guess what? I STILL relapsed 9 months later. I didn’t stop again until I went to prison. It took those drastic measures to stop me. Otherwise, I’d be dead. Unfortunately my addiction led to someone else’s. And that’s a prime example of how addiction makes us selfish. Once we give up, something clicks. I know I’ll be an addict forever. But I have to ask myself if the possibility of killing someone again is more important. Today I’m a successful college student with a fiance, money, food, and shelter. I couldnt have ever dreamed this while I was using. Truly all it takes is to just give up one day and work every day towards pushing on. I’m here for you.
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