Just sobered up from a 2 day binge and I’m just so exhausted by all of this. This stupid addiction that literally ruined my life. I first decided to stop drinking 4 years ago and managed to stay sober for 3 months. Since then it’s at most a couple of weeks. I know very well how terrible I feel after drinking and how bad it is for me and yet I can’t stay away from alcohol. I’m just so hopeless and don’t know what else to do. I tried AA, various communities like this one, I went to the doctor and nothing sticks. I know that I don’t want to drink but my addiction is too strong or/and I am too weak. I’m considering some kind of rehab but that would be difficult because if I don’t work, the bills don’t get paid. Need to do some research. Anyway, thanks for reading.
what have you tried apart from not drinking to overcome your compulsion? cos that won’t be enough for any alkie or druggie.
you need to unearth and face your reasons of why you need to escape your life. long term, in therapy or at least in depth peer groups and self examinaton.
you need to build a life you don’t feel the need to escape from. long term.
you need to develop healthy habits that make you feel good and comfortable in your body and mind and help you get through cravings and the hardships of life. long- and short term.
you need to surround yourself w recovery 24/7, learn, absorb, engage and share. this forum and many other resources are available. long and short term. Resources for our recovery
I don’t really believe you’ve really fully tried and given it your best effort and still you’re drinking. you need to get to a place where the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of changing. then you gotta grab that chance to change with all your might.
Your #1 tip for sobriety (over 2 years sober)
good luck.
@fernweh It’s difficult. I took years before I had to admit to myself that I needed medical, inpatient intervention. I am in Australia and on a public health waiting list it took about 6/7 weeks before my 13 day stay. It was the only way I could detox safely and be a game-changer at the same time. I had to quit my job as I had no idea how long it would take to get an admission, but it was worth the wait. Sometimes you have to put your health (mental and physical) before your job, as hard as that is. I am still on unemployment (on a medical certificate) but will be looking for a new job soon. If that isn’t an option for you, see if there are any outpatient medical detox services in your area perhaps? Here you have to successfully go through detox before you can enter any rehab - not sure about where you are?
AA didn’t work for me, but since being sober for just over 6 weeks now, I have found sharing and encouraging others on this forum to be very motivating to stay the course.
Wish you well in whatever you decide to do xo
Welcome to the community
I love what @Faugxh and @Susy have written. Only you can turn that switch of addiction off for yourself. It is not easy but you have to REALLY Want It!. I know many nights i would cry myself to sleep that this was the last time - no more feeling out of control - no more spinning feelings and guess what the next day it would just repeat itself. I still did not believe i had a problem - i just thought i didn’t gauge my food intake and alcohol consumption correctly – Like that’s a thing LOL
You have tried AA but how many times and how many different groups? I know that sometimes you have to find the one that will click. Also - finding a sponsor that you jive with will be good for accountability.
You do need to get to the root cause of why you keep coming back to drinking when it is so devastating for you. Therapy would be a great start.
This community has been my life savor. SO many threads with so many stories and support. Take some time to read around and jump in when comfortable. I do hope to see you around - wishing you luck on your sobriety journey
I have to be really honest here and say that I don’t appreciate these comments (except for Susy’s) and they are very counterproductive if not demotivating. If you want to do the ‘tough love’ thing, please make sure you REALLY KNOW the person. I don’t appreciate being told that you don’t think I’ve really been trying. You know nothing about me or my path or my efforts. I found this forum to be extremely snobbish, full of people with long term sobriety patronizing those who can’t seem to make it for one reason or another. It’s unfortunate because that very much contradicts the AA principles.
I had to make a decision to not come to this forum and share because if these comments continued, it would only drive me to drink more.
In any case, should you find yourself in my position one day (and trust me, no amount of days guarantee recovery for life), I pray you’d get better treatment and some compassionate advice.
Sending love your way.
Took me years of trying before sobriety finally stuck. That’s the case for many people on here. We’re all addicts just like you, trying our best to support each other.
I don’t think anyone meant to upset you with their replies. All we can do is share our experiences. Hopefully you can give this forum and sobriety another try.
Hi @fernweh,
I hope my message does not come of as something you do not need to hear or do not want to hear or snobbishbor anything like that.
.trying to get sober and find what works for us, especially in the beginning is very hard. The people on this site, generally, mean to be as helpful as possible though things do not alwayd land right, and then for me its like well I take or leave it.
I dont thinj it was meant as you havent really tried, just that its meant not to stop trying! Dont give up on you!!
That 3 months mark I tjink is hard when you first start recovery because between the 3-6 month mark we start to get some kind of antsy. I am not entirely sure why, but I remember when I got sober at 20 (abd was sober until 30 before I thought perhaps I try again to drink…in the end did not work for me; hence I am giving it another go, and hoping this time it sticks! Some exploration for me for sure, but in the end this time around I also felt like damb how the fuck do I stop?) The 3-6 month window I think we get antsy bc we just need to get busy some way, in our “recovery” however that is for you…for me this time I am not in AA, though I found it to be very helpful for me in my 20s Im in a different place (but so much of my hope and principles I have learned I do credit them for :)…I am doing therapy, coming on here and getting busy with hobbies. Im trying to really explore the hard parts ib my life and why I even felt like drinking in the first place. This even has me re-evaluating things I thought I knew already from the last tiem I got sober.
The first little bit is very hard and when we fall, fuck it nakes us feel like a failure and like we cant do it. But we can; you can! I believe it. I think the best thing I learned for me was if something doesnt fit (like a therapist, sponsor or group), it doesnt meanbto give up on me or even the method; just try something a bit different. Sometimes it just doesnt fit us right now, sometimes we just dont jive with that sponsor, program or therapist but…dont give up on myself and the goal I want.
I hope you do stick around but if it is not for you I do hope you find a place you feel confortable in. I havent founs that most people ob here are actually long term sober, i have actually seen much the opposite. Sone people are quite opinionated, but that is again to take or leave. Anyway, i know being vulnerable is VERYVHARD and you put yourself out there. Good for you and I wish you luck xo.
Edit: if you see me around ai always have typos feom my keyboard and I never fix rhem! I am not drunk typing just technologically DISINCLINED 