4th day gets me every time

I just can’t seem to make it past the 4th or 5th day without drinking. I’m not sure what I can do to stop myself from this behaviour. I really don’t feel that AA is for me. Excessive drinking runs in my family & I just wish I was normal. Tired of hangovers & tired of blowing money. Any suggestions?

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Yeah, AA. No one wants to be in AA when they first get there. But it sounds like you need to change something in your life to stop drinking. You can’t just put down the bottle and expect to get better. You need to have some type of program in your life, whether it be the 12 steps, intensive outpatient, SMART, refuge recovery, celebrate recovery or a drug and alcohol counselor. You gotta do something, that’s for sure.


I was the same. I went 3 to 4 days then would drink again. Feel horrible go another 3/4 days and do it again. Did that for like a year then finally gave up and went to an AA meeting. Its helped me and now I’m 70 days sober. I completely get AA might not be for you but you could try it out. Maybe you’ll like it. Another suggestion minus AA would be make plans that fill your day from sun up to sun down. So your distracted all day and can get passed your 4th and 5th day. Once I got passed my 3rd and 4th day things got smoother. Hope this helps.


I agree… it’s not that I don’t want to do a group thing… I’m not all about the higher power stuff. There must be something that will fit for me

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You have to decide what u want

Well yes… looking at my options.

I did not get into AA, and the religious aspect was a turnoff to me, so I can relate, but I still found a lot of value in AA step work, and the support I needed in online meetings, and this forum. Getting the knowledge that I needed to work on myself was important, but I could not have gone through it without the support of other people going through it too.


AA isn’t religious. It’s about finding a power greater than yourself. Some of the best AAers I know are athiests.


Definitely. That’s why I’m here! Lots of great info & support. I’m joining the gym Tomorrow so I’m hoping that will help too


I completely understand about AA, don’t worry. It is NOT for everyone, don’t let anyone push it on you if you don’t feel comfortable with it. There are other options though:
Women For Sobriety is not religious. There is a spiritual part, but not a higher power part.

SMART Recovery is also non-religious

You do need to do more than will power though. You need support from peers and from counselors or mentors. These programs are free. There are online meetings. Try something out.


That’s awesome. Working out definitely helps.

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I’m definitely going to try one of these! Thanks!

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I get that your in AA… your all about it. It’s not for everyone. I’m not here looking to be enabled or judged by you!!! Who do you think u are? We’re all here for the same reasons…& yeah… I think the gym will give me a focal point & something to do in the afternoon when my craving kicks in.

If you read any of the thread, you would see that I didn’t dismiss help. I don’t feel like AA is for me… it doesn’t mean that I’m not serious about being sober or that I’m not going to join a group. The gym is just 1 lifestyle change for me that I think will help. And I am sober. Day 2.


Have you considered outpatient, Refuge recovery (meditation based), SMART recovery (out of a workbook, no spirituality at all)?

Going to the gym is good to do in recovery, but it’s not recovery. @Forged isn’t a prick. He’s being honest. And he’s got a lot more than a few days so he might know a thing or two.
Someone needs to be honest with you bc coddling you won’t get you sober either.

The best advice is often what we need to hear, not what we want to hear.


I forgot to add therapy or seeing a D&A counselor. There’s also Medically Assisted Treatment that involves medication and therapy. I think someone above posted links to anything I forgot.

I think there are better ways to state your opinion. I m not here to be insulted & im not looking to be coddled. I stated the gym is just an avenue for me… it’s just 1 lifestyle change that I wish to make. I plan to join a women’s group ‘ I’m looking into my options in my area. I’m from a very small town & im not sure what is offered here. Yup I’m only on day 2 & have alot of work to do.

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Maybe it will be easier to describe what my recovery plan is. I’m not saying I’m perfect by any means. I’m only a couple days away from 7 months so I’m new too. But these are things I do/have done to get clean:

  1. Inpatient rehab
  2. Outpatient rehab (including behavioral therapy)
  3. D&A counselor
  4. Housing counselor
  5. Job coach
  6. Social services case worker
  7. AA
  8. NA
  9. DRA (dual diagnosis 12 step program)
  10. Psych doctor
  11. Mental health meds
  12. Medically Assisted Treatment (vivitrol injections aka naltrexone)
  13. Meditation
  14. Prayer
  15. Sponsor.
  16. Higher Power
  17. Step work.
  18. Service work and volunteer work
  19. Sober support network.
  20. Exercise as a healthy hobby
  21. SMART recovery

Do you think I want to do all those? Fuck no. I didn’t think half of that was “for me” but I did it anyway. I went in with an open mind to each one and got at least one useful thing out of each of them. I would literally do anything to stay sober. I’m going to try refuge recovery here shortly.

Sobriety is the hardest, most important thing I’ve ever done. I tried the whole “do recovery my way” thing and that never worked. I do all of those other things because they worked for millions of other people. One of the worst thing an alcoholic can do is think they are special or different. We aren’t. We are all alike. Clearly your way isn’t working so give yourself a break and try someone else’s way.


Yes I am looking into women for sobriety. I applaud your determination & hard work.

I’ve heard good things about women in sobriety. I think that’s one I probably won’t get the chance to do lol. I do things because I don’t want to go back to where I was. A little over 7 months ago I was homeless in Pittsburgh. I had to steal candy bars so I could eat. I couldn’t afford new needless so I was shooting up with dull needless that caused my veins to collapse. I was days away from killing myself until I finally got back into rehab. For the third time.

I make these suggestions because I have made all the same mistakes. I have no right to deny anyone their bottom, but I might be able to help them realize they are already there and need to stop digging.

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