First post here. I’ve been trying to stop drinking for about two years. I’m not really a daily drinker; have always been more of a binge drinker. I’ll go two weeks or even a month fine and then get massive urges to get loaded, then I’ll take drink half a bottle of whiskey and finish off the bottle the next day. Afterwards, I’ll go into my cyclical shame cycle and restart. It didn’t used to bother me, but now I feel really convicted to stop; the deep ache to quite won’t go away. I am spiritual, but I find it hard to relinquish myself to being powerless. I’ll hit meetings sometimes, but haven’t had anyone take the time to really talk me through this. It seems that I just get the adage: “go to meetings, don’t drink” and if I slip or miss meetings for a while I feel as though they don’t want to put forth the effort to communicate in a more thorough way or individually to help me get past this issue. Thought? Tips? Thanks for listening.
Reach out when you can friend
You did it here. 
It AA it could help too
I used to go to in person meetings. I don’t go anymore because I’m a new husband and father with a change in location with no transportation outside getting to work
I loved just raising my hand and shereing
I was told to sit in the front a lot
I don’t think AA meetings are for everyone. They’re certainly not for me, but they seem to help a lot of people who prefer that format of things.
If you’re not connecting in that realm I’d suggest finding other programs or support networks for your journey.
I’m only a little over a year sober and this app a has been my main support and I have no complaints.
I know everyone’s needs are different though.
Welcome!
I’d even recommend using this thread to check in daily or interact with people.
My first few months of sobriety I constantly absorbed content surrounding alcohol abuse and addiction. I found that really helpful.
This whole powerless thing gets made out to be more complicated than it actually is.
There isn’t anything that gets its power from itself. Where does my physical energy come from? A series of chemical reactions related to the food I eat. Where does the food get its energy from? A series of chemical reactions related partly to the sun, and partly to the soil, and since the soil gets its energy eventually from the sun, it’s really all about the sun.
We are, as Joni Mitchell famously wrote, “…billion year old carbon”. None of us get our power from ourselves. We are powerless. All our physical power comes from the sun.
Why should our metaphysical power be any different?
Welcome to Talking Sober!
In terms of my addiction recovery, I think of powerlessness in a more focused way: I know that if I let my addiction back into my behaviour, very quickly it will descend into dark places and I could die. I know I can’t control it. I know I have no power over it. Therefore, I am powerless over the addiction. That’s not a bad thing. A specific acknowledgment of powerlessness over a specific thing - my addiction - is empowering and liberating for me.
Maybe a program that focuses on empowerment would be a better fit for you? You might want to check out SMART or Recovery Dharma.
Welcome! I was a binge drinker as well and was very familiar with the shame regret drink cycle / roller coaster. It is a sucky way to exist.
I had to step into my own power to get sober. Own up to the mess I was perpetuating and find some self confidence, self esteem and self respect again. I did that one day at a time of not drinking and with the huge assistance of this app, lots of reading, activity, changing my day to day and getting honest about what my drinking was costing me. One book I found particularly helpful was This Naked Mind by Annie Grace. It helped me get real on what alcohol was offering me and what it wasn’t.
Meetings help a ton of people, but I can’t speak to that experience, as it isn’t something I pursued.
Hope to see you around. Tips…don’t drink today. Read all sorts of threads here.
This thread is also full of wisdom…
I think of the powerlessness as freeing. I am powerless over alcohol. It won, in a way.
Because I am an alcoholic I can’t drink or I’ll fall right back into my own binge/shame patterns. I can only step out of that loop by avoiding alcohol.
Accepting that I’m not weak willed or unable to moderate has been a game changer for my sobriety. The only power I have is to not take that first drink. There is no stopping after the first. Maybe not the first night, maybe not the second but eventually I will try to drink all the alcohol I can hold. This is a fact, not a flaw.
I don’t go to meetings but I do enjoy the second-hand AA teachings I pick up here. Welcome! Plenty of good content on here.
Thank you for the kind words
That you so much.
Matt, this is a great point. Thanks for the articulate clarity of such a statement.
Thank you for sharing your story and tips.
Thank you. I guess it is freeing in many ways. It’s funny how we wrongfully perceive substances that embody entrapment as freeing and vice-versa.
@JFrancis Welcome to the greatest recovery forum in existence.
AA, only really works if you get a Sponsor. He’ll take you through the steps and explain them as you go.
Also, get phone numbers and give out yours, it’ll help build a support network.
Not all AA meetings are the same, if you’re not getting support at the one you go to try a different one.
AA has kept me sober for quite a while 
All of what’s already been said in this thread, is well worth considering if you find AA is not for you, or in addition to AA!
But, you’ll still need a recovery program, of whatever flavour, if you’re going to beat this bastard into submission.
It’s a battle which you have to fight every minute and every hour of every day, and you only win by going to bed sober.
Rinse and repeat every day forever.
Stay strong, stay safe and remember it’s always One Day At A Time(ODAAT)
&
What a great thing to read this morning, thank you! You are right. The thing I’m looking for an and saying that I’m not fully receiving will most likely be found in a sponsor. I have yet to ask anyone. Not sure why I haven’t. Maybe I’m fearful that they won’t be a good fit? Maybe in my subconscious that is my excuse because my disease still wants me to drink?
Nobody thinks I give good advice…So, for what it’s worth…
You started your journey a couple years ago…you took some “steps” and now your here, that’s progress, be patient, congratulate yourself.
Projecting your thoughts as others feelings (not comfortable at meetings) is something else, and I’m not a doctor , but if you are not diggin meetings, chances are meetings are not for you.
(Sorry for the upcoming comma splice).
You will get to where you are to be, when you get there, and no sooner.
As frustrating as it can be, have patience with the universe, she works at her own pace.
Don’t be hard on yourself, do what you can do and go from there.
Be well
Welcome @JFrancis have you got a sponsor?
Edit posted before reading all the replies above
Good insight here
Find a meeting you like, find a guy whos shares resonate with you, and grab a coffee or lunch with them, chat. If convo is easy, ask em to be your sponsor
I love you mind @Matt
Welcome to the site @JFrancis
I hope you will find the support you need to succeed. Best wishes.
Great advice, thank you.