I hope he starts being honest with you because if he does continue to lie about so much to you it is certainly worth considering leaving him…You are supposed to be able to trust your significant other…
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What a fuckin day. Like in a positive. Im on the right path kinda way. Sobriety is a fucking miracle.
Got my 2yr chip tonight at my favorite ladies meeting.
Also got made by a coworker at said meeting. Dude thats one of my biggest fears and this shit happens on a day i get my 2 year chip and share my experience, strength, and hope. Well ill get thru it. Hope she takes AAs anonymity principle as seriously as i do. Here we go lol
Amazing fuckin ladies meeting. Alot of powerful shares, strength, and love. It fueled my soul and sobriety.
Then i had the opportunity to take a meeting to a young lady alcoholic who was in the hospital after another serious relapse.
I feel envigorated and pumped after my day today. I got to feel the hope and joy and blessings of sobriety, share that with others who are struggling, and get a reminder that noones immune to this disease and its a progressive beast waiting for me to get complacent or get cocky. Today i am reminded to be humble and take things one day at a time.
So fucking greatful to be a recovering alcoholic. This horrible disease lead me to where i am today where i know a peace, love, and spirituality i always dreamed up. Lifes shit but ya have a fighting chance sober
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Well done on your 2 years CJ, beautiful share…you truly ROCK!!! Big love from me 
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Love right back at ya, my lovely sober sis
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Congratulations @Cjp Soooo happy for you!
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Love this!! Wow on all of it…you have come so far in your journey my friend. Great work on your 2 years and your drive to keep pushing forward 
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Sitting,well laying, and getting my tattoo to celebrate my growth in recovery. Its been really fucking hard and i havent always taken the next right step but im so deeply greatful for my life now and my recovery. Fuck its hard typing with my left hand…but here i am proving i can do hard things lol
Note to self tats hurt more on fleshy body parts and areas of thin skin.
So far…this tat isnt as bad as the one on my back.
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You are one of my very favourite inspirations sister!
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You are too sweet
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Yes you can
Oh yeah the back would have been worse…they say it’s most painful on bone and over organs.
What an awesome reward to mark your2 years!
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Checking in, feeling talkative so might as well document my sober journey these days.
Ive had such a fantastic day and its not like everything went right ( my broken car is in the shop as we speak and wont get fixed until tues at the earliest, yay holiday weekend) but my sober, manic, peacefully optimistic mind was able to see beauty in how my day played out. Its like i saw the matrix and my higher power doing for me what i could not do for myself.
Got a nice workout in
Made it to therapy and it was just what i needed. Like my mom is having heart issues, will need open heart surgery at some point, and my sisiter in law didnt know and yelled at me for not telling her at my nieces graduation lol can you say drama? Neways. We talked about that hubbub and my fear of having to deal with her opinionated ass as my parents start to age and get sick and not have it be a me my sister and brother thing. Idk complicated emotions and dynamics all while me facing my mothers mortality. Thats alot. But besides that we covered alot of ground and i think i had an ah ha moment on my all or nothing thinking, on my belief that i must give 100% or i fail, that belief that its never enough, fuck that all or nothing thinking that is so synonymous with bipolar and addiction. Bam im a double winner. Well if i have to do my best why cant it be 100% balance? Interesting thought.
Ive been struggling to find balance in my life for the past couple months and trying to do it all: at home, at work, with family, with sobriety, with growing as a human, in my marriage, my mental health, my fitness. Its fucking exhausting. Ive been contemplating what balance means to me and im frustrated that i havent figured it out yet. As she says im in the planning stages, fine rock with it.
Feeling great after my session, headed to the grocery store quick b4 making lunch. My fricken dashboard lites up like a christmas tree…talking ABS, Check engine, swervy car guy, car on an incline lite, cruise control was flashing, oil temp lite flashing…never seen this shit happen and im like poltergiest?! Neways was able to drive off the expressway right to the grocery store. (In hindsight i shouldnt just parked in the closest stall and shoulda parked away from others but fuck i was just trying to get somewhere safe b4 roxy my subaru dies) neways without panicking or losing my shit i problem solved. I calledmy regular mechanic and asked if i can drive it or if i should tow it. Tow it. Ok. Theyre too far away. Ps holiday weekend in usa…mechanics close up shop for the next 2 days. Called the dealer i just went to for an oil change, maybe they f’d smth up?! They cant get me in until june1. Fuck. I google mechanics near me, find one open for 3 more hours and they can give me a diagnostic at a decent but not cheap fee. Cool. Got AAA 
cool. Easy online process bam. Strolled into the grocery store and treated myself to a coffee. Like hell i was stressing out about time pressure and having to get all this shit done and my higher powers like how about i let you coast into your destination safely and you slow your roll. Check. Tow truck only took 20min. Some shoppers were inconvenienced for a few minutes, some gauked, some snarled, some found there way around us, and then my higher power sends this sweet lady. Shes staring, she sweetly says thats unfortunate to happen on a holiday weekend. Can i give you a ride somewhere? (How fricken sweet) humankindness. Beautiful. No thank you maam. My husbands on his way. Godwink. Grace. Idk i had this peace in a very stressful situation and it was like im just gonna do the next right thing…roll with it.
This is getting long. I said i was feeling talkative.
Neways my higher power appears to me in nature. I saw those signs today. In birds. In a bluejay friend, butterflies.
Oh so all this to say my hp told me to slow my roll. Got a diagnostic. Something with a valve body on my transmission. Google it…this may be covered under warranty. Granted warranty is 10yrs or 100k mi, but im just at 100,125…come on. Theres hope, subarus a good dealer. So got that going for me. I have a flexible work schedule and i may be able to work from home tues if needed or use my husbands car bc we are a two car household. Idk feeling blessed like shit could always be worse and things are playing out in magnificant fashion
So to wrap this short story up, sobriety journey good. Skills learned good. Gratitude is a way of life. And no reason to stress over something i cant control.
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Wow! What a day! Glad you were able to stay calm and navigate everything. Your higher power was definitely doing for you what you couldn’t do for yourself. Amazing stuff! Sending positive vibes for better days ahead
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Thanks for the positive vibes @Lisa07 glad to share this journey with you
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LOVE THIS CJ! Great summation and way to go on staying cool and collected during it all! 
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I finally admitted that I’m an alcoholic after 37 years of drinking, the past year really off the charts.
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Congrats taking that step and owning the problem. That is huge in kickstarting recovery. Be honest. Be open. Be willing.
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Leaving this link here for later ref. Beautiful sentiments
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This resonates deeply. The key isnt willpower but surrender
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Treading close to 800 days sober. 2 days away. This weeks lesson is acceptance and letting be.
I woke up way too early this sunday and raced a 4mi run. Had my best race time of 9:14 /mi just under 37min. I had a moment of yaaa. Atlast i said i just want to finish before 45min. I wanted more almost right after. This feeling of never enough is pervasive in my thinking. It makes me tired and steals joy from my accomplishment. Oh well now im planning a 10k lol
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You may have to remind me about 800. 798 is awesome.
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