Thinking about surrendering to my higher power yesterday and i had an epiphany. I was saying how if i believed in a deity and not an energy it would be asy to visualize handing over all my “stuff”. Then it hit me…i can give my higher power a face. Idk what that looks like but i think this is a big step in surrendering. Live and let God (higher power). Stop trying to control and just go with the flow. Accepting things i cant change. Courage to take action on things i can change. And the wisdom to know the difference :).
Meeting with my sponsor to go over steps two and three tonight. Im excited. Im ready. I know its not a race but im ready to “graduate” to taking a moral inventory. We shall see.
Your really making great progress and moving in the right direction. You keep showing up, working on yourself, and trying to do the next right thing. Continue stringing more 24 hrs together and it will keep getting better and better. It does take time. So being patient is key. I’ve been going through phases of surrendering more every 3 weeks to a month. It is making life so much easier. I am finding some happiness and contentment. Miracles do happen, stick around and keep growing. Your only going to go up from here if you keep doing what your doing and continue growing spiritually.
If step 3 is too much all at once you can you always make it more simple. Turning it over in step 3 is simply just a commitment to working the rest of the steps. You can find your HP by just continuing on with what you’ve been doing
Its official i graduated to step four. Well my sponsor said theres no graduating or gold stars in aa but im feeling accomplished. I am truly putting a lot of thought and effort into these steps. Im finding a peace and a joy i havent had in who knows how long. Something is working!
Went thru step 2 and 3 with my sponsor over the past couple weeks and rounded it out tonight. I was feeling manic, racing thoughts, anxious before i met with my sponsor but reading step 3 again and discussing some deep shit with her was oddly satisfying. Free therapy? I decided my willingness has opened the door for step 3 but i will have to keep revisiting this often to make sure i am not led by self will and giving it all up to my higher power.
Fuck! I feel like a greatful recovering alcoholic! Greatful because all my missteps have led me to the desperation to try AA and im growing spiritually. Thats what ive craved for years. Im realizing how fucking lost, lonely, and wasted ive been for years. My eyes are opening to a world of new realities and practicing gratitude daily puts me in the right mindframe to listen to my higher power.
88 days today. Seems so fucking crazy. I never thought this was possible. It all started with dry january. Even though i was just counting down the days to drink again i got a taste of what being sober was like. Then my addiction and depression just got worse when i lost my job. My drinking was escalating and i was polishing off a liter of vodka a day. I was barely living. Im greatful my hubby was like ok, enough, lets do another 30 days. But something was different this time. I started going to AA zooms and was listening to the message. I saw people who were happy and free from obcession. I wanted that. Then i started attending an in person ladies meeting and found a sponsor.
Let me tell you the AA Promises are fucking real. And im realizing these amazing epiphanies and joy and peace i always urned for.
Im expecting myself to get a little squirrely because my 90 day milestone is coming up but my sponsor told me thats normal and she goes through the same thing even after 6 years of recovery.
Im happy to say im a greatful recovering alcoholic and im blessed. Greatful for everything that has brought me to this point in life and im looking forward to learning more recovery tools in AA and learning more about myself.
That’s a really good question. To me, sobriety isn’t just about not drinking. I think those that don’t suffer with addiction can still feel serenity and peace by meditation, mindfulness, self-compassion, self care.
90 days tomorrow! Im going to an aa meeting and im prolly gonna share. Im not the best at sharing off the cuff. I want to think about it.
Im finally a greatful recovering alcoholic. Taking it one day at a time and enjoying the personal and spiritual growth on my journey. Ive done it with the help of TS, AA, and my sponsor. 2022 was just my year to hit my bottom and realize i need help for my alcohol addiction. The depression, self loathing, and stagnation just became too much. Im greatful for this divine intervention and definitely a newfound freedom. This is only the beginning and i hope to work my recovery for many years to come.
Yes @Bobbyw ! And you can make it better! For me it works really well to fill myself with good if I want to feel good. Sounds very simplistic but it works every time. If I’m feeling really low I’ll put on a stand-up comedy show to help kick myself out of a dark place, but just a daily filling up the soul when we’re coming from a place of such desolation and isolation and darkness is so important because we have to counteract what’s pulling at us with the opposite side, right? We really are fighting for our life and our sobriety so put some good stuff in your arsenal to combat the bad. Meetings are always a good place for me to fill up my cup of well-being but simple things like listening to music that always makes me feel good, watching something motivational and inspirational on YouTube, flipping through inspirational posts on this app, start finding what feeds your soul and fill it up! It gets good, it gets really, really good.
90 FUCKING DAYS. 3 MONTHS. I DID THAT SHIT! And i have no intention of slowing down. Im full steam ahead sober train. This is wild. I never thought i could attain this milestone. Ive avoided temptation, told that addict voice to fuck right off countless times, attended atleast 3 in person AA meetings a week, typically would catch my zoom meeting at night, work the steps with my sponsor, and am putting in the work. Im a lil scared of losing my sobriety so im alert. Im greatful for this forum, the day counter and journal, AA, and the fellowship which feeds my soul.
90 days ago i was bloated, dehydrated, lost, depressed, sad, lonely, and tired
Today im energized, joyful, thoughtful, greatful, growing, and learning so much about me. Im having fun exploring my new life.
Ive been stalled on step 4 for a few weeks. Im meeting with my sponsor tonight. I hope i get some insight and guidance on how to do this step thouroughly. Im stuck on resentments and anger. I feel like my list isnt long enough…maybe i dont carry alot of resentments? Hoping for progress today!
Just checking in…112 days aka 16 weeks. Its felt like forever but it hasnt even been four months. Recovery is a full time job. I still think about drinks but i wont because i dont want to ruin my streak. I wish my sponsor had more time for me. Still on the fourth step. Attending 3-5 in person aa meetings a week. I enjoy the fellowship. Ive had bad anxiety for the past couple of weeks. We saged the house and im feeling better.
Huge Congrats!