Do you have any advice for my best friend? She’s an alcoholic & if you have any advice, I’d love to give it to her. I have no experience with alcoholism or alcohol withdrawals, so I’m not sure how to help her.
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Hey Alex
I really feel like alcoholism is such a tricky disease as alcohol is all around us — You find it at the grocery store, majority of social gatherings include it, used for a good time, a bad time, just because, great cold one on a hot day. Dealing with hangovers is a watercooler punch line - “man did i really tie one on this weekend”… I am still having a hard time defining myself as an alcoholic even though all the signs are in front of me.
I knew that alcohol wasn’t good for me as wasn’t the weed and cigs and even with my health issues I would never think that alcohol could be the cause for me not healing quicker or at all. For me it took me driving home from a meet up with a buddy and trying to stand infront of my mom to have a conversation. I could not stand straight and was slurring my words. I was shocked at the feeling of being drunk as I was minutes ago driving home (40 min drive) — WTF! how was I this drunk and in front of my mom – horrified me. The whole way home I was singing and even ran a few errands – I did not think I had over consumed alcohol. That’s when I said no more. Everyone is going to have their own breaking points.
Even with the amount of alcohol I drank I was shocked to have no major withdrawal symptoms. This only helped my stupid addict mind try and convince me that I don’t have an problem - thank god i didn’t listen. I did start getting loopy, more tired than usual (if that is possible), moody and clumsy around 3 months - found out that this is PAWS.
I am grateful for the book i’m reading (very slowly) – Quit Like A Woman – so good that i’ve asked my brother to read it as well as I don’t think it’s only for woman and has some alarming good points. Would your friend be up to reading this?
The best thing to do is talk with your friend and share your concerns.
Is your friend in therapy - may help find out the underlying reason to why they are drinking (there isn’t always one but may help if they can figure that out).
Do they feel they are an alcoholic - this is first step cause if they don’t think they have a problem then you really can’t move forward.
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Yes, my homegroup is about a 20 minute drive from me. They meet seven days a week, at different times, every day of the year. It’s a blessing to have that much availability of meetings. All my meetings are at 5:30 because that best fits my schedule.
I would advise your friend to join this community and get some support to stay sober.
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@XXIX , for your best friend I highly recommend The Easy Way for Women to Quit Drinking by Allen Carr, and the other book that helped me save my life, made it all click for me, the one I carry around, buy copies to share…
You Should Definitely Read It, too!
Alcohol withdrawls suck. It was hard for me to do, but it helped me to wean myself, go longer periods without, wait later in the day to start, a drink or two fewer every day or two till I stopped. It turned out to be easier not to drink at all than to try to drink less like that, but I had been drinking too much to go cold turkey. I was afraid of seizures. Anyway, I hope that helps. Feel free to message anytime. Is your friend on the app yet?
I hope you had a great day!
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Ha ha, Yes @JazzyS ! 
That’s my book! Quit Like a Woman - Holly Whitaker, a Total Lifesaver, complete game changer.
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I’ve mentioned this community to her before. I’m still patiently waiting for her to join. Seeing her be an active member of our beautiful community would mean the WORLD to me! 
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Totally agree - I find i’m not reading it as much cause i’m more on this app these days which is also helpful but literally every page i’ve read so far is magic - it’s eye opening and really hits home. She really did an amazing job of putting journey on paper but also all the research —I too carry this with me everywhere and plan to keep on hand even after I finally finish reading
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I’ll definitely mention the book to her…I actually just might buy it for her. Thanks! I’ll send you a message with more information that I don’t feel comfortable posting for all to read.
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Should my friend quit cold turkey or slowly?
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Does she Want to quit? If so, how she does it has to be her choice. If you two haven’t already, you’ll want to research what symptoms of withdrawl might occur based on her drinking habits and how long she’s been at 'em. That said, it is different for every body. For me the risk for seizure was real, so I felt it safer to wean. If she wants to do that, the Allen Carr book I mentioned might be helpful. Another great resource is The Mantra Project - Courses — HOLLY WHITAKER.
Gotta run for now. Hope you are having a super stellar sober Saturday! 
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Hmm…
For self harm, I just reset at midnight the next day,
But for substance, I put the time that i really truly decided it was now or never. When i said no more! It was 01:47 and I have kept that time.
I think i hadn’t used in a while (maybe since midnight) when i made the choice but to me, the time I decided to get sober was more important on this one
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Thanks, Birdy. I’ll let her know. She wants to stop. It’s just very difficult for her.
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Oh, very difficult for sure. For some of us the most difficult, painful, excruciating, gut-wrenching, liberating, magnificent, glorious, beautiful thing we’ll ever do. Thank God we can do hard things. We don’t have to do them alone. Throw everything you’ve got at it, and stick with what works. We are, our lives, are worth it all. Remind her. I believe in you! Both!
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I read ALLEN CARR’s book over the weekend. I liked it very much. Great information.
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It makes me so happy to hear that, @tailee17 
Thank you very much for letting me know you read it, and you liked it. It’s a little weird, I know, but very helpful if you can get through it. I remember thinking, “What is this?” Lol I started and stopped a few times over about a nine month period before I started again and finally finished the night I took my last drink. I’m so grateful for it now. I pray it helps you as well, and many others. Never question the decision. Works for me. Thanks again, for letting me know. Keep in touch, okay?
In case anybody else wants to give it a try…Allen Carr’s Quit Drinking Without Willpower: Be a happy nondrinker (Allen Carr’s Easyway, 2) https://a.co/d/hKGTDQm
I read the kindle version, but it’s available in other formats and for other addictions.
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I read Easy way for women to quit drinking by Allen Carr
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