Very emotional day today I’ve not eaten and done nothing. Numbness, tingling stiff, anxious frustration. So very close to drinking because it temporarily eases the suffering. I called the doctors and have appointment on Friday.
I going to try zero lagers perhaps for a placebo effect.
I question everything now. Is this really because of alcohol? I mean I have never felt like i needed it but I do recognise over the last 25 years or so it had caused me a lot of problems. A list so long I dont know where to begin.
I hope this is some kind of blip and tomorrow’s ok or I going to give in to the booze with a f@ck it attidude
Alcohol doesn’t really ever help. Eat something, go for a walk, turn up the radio and sing along. Do something else to occupy your mind. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow. It gets better!
I have been doing a lot of walking and listing to music, cold showers breathing exercises lately alcohol free for 34 days. The sensations in my body today have been intense it can’t handle much more. I take high dose thiamine but starting to wonder if it’s enough. Not a lot more I can do
The alcoholic mind is devious. Having insight to this helps, accepting that it will at times be louder than sticking our head behind a rocket is important. You don’t need/have to pick up that bucket of fuckits. It’s not worth our time any more.
You’re capable and clear right now. A drink only makes the mud puddle murky. Even in early recovery it’s not a good idea to have beer zero, as I call it.
I know what you are saying is right and I thank you for that. I had some zeros and my partner made dinner. I will be sober tonight. Tomorrow is a new day and I pray the pain reduces for me. On Friday I will see doctor and ask some new questions I have after asking chat gpt about my symptoms.
Thank you. I find it really hard to see past the discomfort especially today. It got hold of me hard. I feel a bit more at ease now except for a thumping headache and exhaustion. Im already glad im not sat drinking alcohol. But it was close. I know I shouldn’t wish my life away but tomorrow can’t come soon enough. Thank you.
Thank you @CanadianGirl it’s only 18.20 pm but im in my bed im full and tired just dont want to sleep to soon or il be awake super early tomorrow. But saying that my head is pounding my eyes are tearful but im glad I wrote my post I nearly didn’t. Thank you!
Glad to read thar u havent drank There will be easier days ahead. I know that when it comes to having the urge to use or drink, it helps if I have taken care of myself in all aspects. Self care for me was (and still is) crucial in recovery. That means eating when hungry, sleeping when tired, connecting with others when feeling alone, and finding healthy ways to cope with intense emotion.
HALT (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) are reasons for relapse in early recovery. So its important that we take care of ourselves in this manner.
Im glad u have a Dr appt Friday. Just take it one day at a time. You may think that alcohol temporarily reduces the suffering, but in all reality, it creates MORE. You then have ur previous pain PLUS all the consequences from drinking. So it makes it much worse. Try not to let ur mind lie to u and convince u that alcohol will help.
Stay closely connected to the forum and any other supports u may have We are here for u.
I hope the docs goes okay on Friday. Well done for working through the urge and checking in here. Alcohol would dolve nothing and make things worse to boot. Together we’ve got this
I am so very sorry to read that you were dealing with such an emotional day. How are you doing since you wrote?
I am hoping that you kept fighting and did not pick up. Great work on getting out for that walk and listening to music and reaching out to the doctor.
Grateful for this! Tomorrow is a new day. I know that pain is hard to deal with (emotional and physical). Drinking will not provide any comfort. It will only delay the healing. I have had chronic pain for many decades and has been on the extreme side for past few years. Yes - drinking would be great to numb myself for the moment but no way would I be able to sustain that numbness. No way will my body every heal enough to be able to deal with the pain if I were to drink…I do have faith that I will heal and get better – I know this and that is what keeps me from taking that temporary relief.
SO grateful my friend. I know that sometimes the symptoms get to be too much and we do want it all to end. This is when you reach out for support. Find ways to get through it cause it will pass.
Wishing you a wonderful night’s sleep and a brighter day tomorrow Take it One moment at a time!
Thanks Jazzy. I did manage to get some good sleep. It’s 08.20 not been awake for long. I have a black coffee and so far feel better than yesterday. Breathing exercises soon then cold shower.
The only thing I take is Thiamine (Vitamin B1) 300mg a day. It looks like 25 + years of heavy binge drinking has gifted me with alcoholic neuropathy. I was told 5 years ago I had an inflamed esophagus (esophagusitis) because of drinking, smoking etc. I just took no notice and carried on because I had medication for it which I abused. (Omeprazole) it looks like I have nerve damage because my body was unable to absorb the B1 from food because of the inflammation and beer. I have to remain sober or will get worse so im learning to put up with the pain and pray and hope for some nerves to repair.
I’m so sorry you are dealing with nerve pain. I know how painful that is. I have been told that it can be healed but may take many years (depending on the extent of damage and location). Taking your B vitamins is great to help with the repair. Stay hopeful friend. Reach out on the really bad days
I am now working with a acupuncturist and hopefully will see some relief soon. I’ve been told that massage therapy can help but I’m not one to enjoy massages lol.
I’m following these tips to help my body naturally heal. Maybe something here may be useful for you.
There will be easier days ahead. I know that when it comes to having the urge to use or drink, it helps if I have taken care of myself in all aspects. Self care for me was (and still is) crucial in recovery. That means eating when hungry, sleeping when tired, connecting with others when feeling alone, and finding healthy ways to cope with intense emotion.
SO grateful my friend. I know that sometimes the symptoms get to be too much and we do want it all to end. This is when you reach out for support. Find ways to get through it cause it will pass.
Take it One moment at a time!
