Hi all, first time using the app and my first acceptance that I have a real issue with drink that needs addressing.
For 15 or so years now I’ve been a binge drinker, go days without drinking but as soon as I get the taste for it I can’t switch it off. I’ve always thought as I’m a working bloke with house and family then I’m fine, but when I look back at all the issues I’ve ever had in life it can be tracked back to alcohol.
I’ve been arrested, fell out with people I love, behaved like a muppet and ignored numerous calls from the Mrs on a night out as I just refuse to let the night end. Ignored many final warnings and Sunday night did it again and I’ve finally broken the Mrs.
Want to sort myself out for my son now, got my first AA meeting later and spoke to others via their services and couldn’t believe how many people have been through the same type of addiction as me!
Drink turns me into someone completely different and every time I say I can control it, it doesn’t take long before I lose the plot and go back to my old ways and prioritise nothing but my next drink.
So I’ve made the decision it’s got to be completely cutting out alcohol before it’s too late and I lose everything.
Kinda feel like you aren’t an alcoholic because you aren’t sat on a bench drinking lager every day and that’s maybe why me and a lot of others never thought it was a problem.
What’s everyone’s advice for sticking to sobriety as I have a lot of mates and most the stuff we do revolves around the pub and drinking…
thanks in advance
Welcome to TS, Jimmy. Glad you are here, and you are in good company. Plenty of us can relate to what you are going through, there are many threads here, so it takes time to negotiate your way through. Tips and advice can be found, and places to vent and seek support and be accountable. If I were better at giving you some links , I would, but you can use the search bar. Likely someone else who is more adept will pop in soon.
I wouldn’t be so concerned about the label of alcoholic or addict. You have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol and want to kick its ass out of your life. Congratulations on taking that first step! So gather your sober tools together, and join us on your sober journey, one day at a time!
Welcome 
Take it one day at a time.
Good advice above to read around, I found when I first came here that I wasn’t alone in my addictive ways, I also found that many have pushed through and recovering and that gave me hope.
It’s nice to meet you 
Welcome my friend & the only thing i can tell you right now in advance is that you need to do this for “yourself” & only you! That might sound selfish but everything else will fall into place once your clean & sober!
Welcome Jimmy!
I struggle with the same kind of drinking, if you have identified it as a problem and something that’s outside of your control I would say you don’t need any further defenition.
If you have a lot of mates that go to the pub often I would recommend telling them you are going sober - I know it seems simple but not putting this boundary in place has given me a sneaky way back to old habits more times than I can count.
Welcome mate you just basically typed my drinking life lol can 100 % relate.
So bit of my background used to love a beer but like u never new when to stop my mates could go home but i would need to carry on to the point id drink anything in the house. Gradually my tolerance got better and it was turning into days of drinking to escape the hangover id crack open a bottle of wine the next day and keep going but come monday id be in work not drinking so couldnt possibly be an addict,
but u see its a funny word addict as i have learnt its not just about the drink but its the lifestyle i used to get excited like wake up early on the day i knew id be drinking id go to the same shop/pub and the walk there was like a kid going to a toy shop i couldnt wait. But like u the fall out from a drinking session also worsened to the point i was lying to people about what i did , numerous arrests for drunken disorderly and many falling outs with my now ex wife, but still i wasnt an addict as i didnt drink everyday. You see addiction is a crafty bastard and lies to you about everything to get what it wants , it basically took me to lose everything to finally think perhaps i do have a problem and now over the last year ive tried to stop i had a good run at first and got to 89 days but then things happened with my ex and i used the booze again to cope with the crap like i was programmed to do but i got back on the horse and learnt from it and am now 6 months sober and honestly havent felt this good in 20 odd years so it can be done u just have to want it for you , dont do it for anyone else i tried that and it dont work. Good luck and well done for taking that first step 
Hey mate, I’m the exact same. Good job, family, mortgage etc. Love to have a drink on Friday Arvo, Saturday Arvo, ohh maybe just a few on Sunday but end up black out. It’s all good, it gave me a good sleep and I’m ready to go Monday. Oh, we’re going out to dinner Monday night, I’ll have a few out and keep going to black out that night. I was getting to the point my wife would be talking about what we spoke about the previous night and I had to pretend I knew what she was talking about. Anyway, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday no drinks. Nope, I don’t have a problem. So keen for a drink on Friday!
My issue was at the end of each drinking night or during the hungover morning I would say id get my shit together and stop drinking. But by the afternoon, the hangovers gone and I feel really good and so keen for a drink. I call it the merry-go-round.
I’ve been off it for 9 days and hope to stay off it indefinitely. I’ve tried so many times that it’s at a point now that I can’t fail, otherwise my life will be over.
You’re definitely not alone mate! I’ve been addicted to reading different threads in this forum and it’s amazing how many people are like us. You are amazing for recognising the problem and trying to be better.
P.s. you sound Australian. Is that correct?
I would say, congrats on recognising there is a problem. If drinking keeps causing problems for you then it probably is one,You are right,you don’t need to be sitting on a park bench drinking all day to have alcohol addiction issues…
Also, if you have difficulty controlling or liimiting the amount you drink, probably another sign there’s a problem. The thing is though, that you absolutely have to want this 100 Percent. It probably won’t work if you are just doing it to make others happy because it takes a lot of dedication,commitment ,effort which requires a want for yourself to improve your life. I am not saying you don’t want this, just pointing out that I think it’s got be your own personal goal or whatever as well…As for your friends and their life ‘revolving around the pub.’ To me, this is one of the hardest parts…Sometimes you might need to reevaluate your friendships or at least change your habits/ lifestyle completely…I wouldn’t recommend attempting sobriety by still hanging out at the pub with mates. The temptation and threat to sobriety is too high and then your back to square one…I hope this doesn’t sound too negative, just my experiences and observations with myself and many others attempting to stay sober…the upside is, you could live a much more fulfilling life💜
Must be…pretty sure only us Aussies say Muppet,right? Lol
There’s so much here that I can relate to… Especially, to escape hangovers, excited on days of drinking but the consequences were always hell…the more I drank,the more problems I had the more problems I had, the more I tried to escape them with alcohol…it just kept making it worse.i would drink so much, I started waking up extremely anxious so I would drink to dull the anxiety which would come back 10 fold the next day. It was a terribly destructive never ending cycle.
That’s exactly me mate takeneveey opportunity you can to crack open a bottle of whatever, but I work shifts so sometimes the weekends are on midweek days… and then when not on nights at weekend I’ll have a skin full and go in work hungover also. It’s mental to see others going through the same and congratulations on the 9 days also, not Australian though. I’m from England.
To everyone else I appreciate the replies and it’s good too see others was the same and have managed to turn their lives around and find sobriety.
Just taking it one day at a time but the urge after 2 or so days sober to have a drink tonight is kicking in. More proves to me that there is a problem that needs sorting.
This time I’m getting it right 
The main thing I’ve seen and take out of what a lot of said is that it’s got to be done for me and no one else or I’ll fail, went to my first meeting last night and everyone in the meeting related to what I said. I know if I don’t change now I’ll end up worse and in situations they was in where the recovery is 10x harder! I’m determined to do this as nobody has ever said they regret quitting drinking. Appreciate the reply
Hi, UK also. Your story is exactly the same as mine if you swapped this Sunday night for Saturday! I class myself as a binge drinker also, go a few days dry then hit the drink hard and don’t stop until I either black out/puke/get arrested. Decided this Sunday morning enough was enough, looked at the 8 empty Guiness cans and 1 litre bottle of Smirnoff on the worktop. On top of this I had considered the merits of drinking a bottle of Chinese cooking wine we keep for making stir fry… I joined Smart Recovery that day. So far I’ve done 2 online meetings and one in person. Binging seems to be very common in this country, even part of our national identity, work the week to spend the weekend comatose. Smart may not be for you, hell it might not work for me, but it’s another resource that you could add to this site and AA. Either way best of luck with the path you choose.
Yeah I’ve been there I was a binge drinker. Would wind up sick and shaking for the first few days off alcohol every time. I’m still working on trying to find ways to have a life outside drinking and for right now it’s mostly work and exercise. I went to my first meeting in a long time the other day. I recommend it. Might help you find other ways to spend time besides the pubs.
It’s definitely glorified in this country. Mrs had itv this morning on today and at 10.45 they was drinking wine, and then an hour later a cocktail and somehow making out it was normal behaviour. Hopefully via this app and meetings, speaking to people like who have reached out on here already will help us sort ourselves out mate. Good luck to you an all.
Hello mate this is a carbon copy of my life until I gave up 4 years ago. I was a binge drinker out every weekend didn’t know when to stop. Ruining relationships but more importantly battering my mental health. A lot of my pals at the time wouldn’t do anything unless it involved the pub, needless to say they are no longer in my life now. If you want to make changes to your life then you will have to make what seems like cut throat decisions but ultimately these decisions will benefit you. Surround yourself with people who are positive in your life. There are plenty things to do at weekends which dont involve drinking. I started driving to football matches and by the time 6pm came I couldn’t be bothered going out. The urge to drink passed for me. I did speak with a counsellor about my drinking and I found this life changing, if I didn’t do this them I wouldn’t be where I am today. You can change if you want too, but you really need to want it!
I’m recently sober and feel the exact same way. I didn’t feel like an alcoholic because I wasn’t drinking every day and I could go days or weeks. I tried having just one or 2 like my husband. I said only when we go out, or no hard liquor or no shots. I tried everything, but I couldn’t do it. I would have “just one” and then it turned into many. I honestly didn’t feel drunk at the time, but realized the next morning that I had blackouts. It started affecting my health, job and relationship. I had to make the decision that it was either all or nothing. I couldn’t control myself once I started drinking, so I had to stop. I wanted to stop. I came to the realization that my job, my health, and my family were more important to me than alcohol. I know it’s going to be hard to break a 30 year habit, but I want to do this. I’m just going to take it one day at a time And find other hobbies that give me a buzz. Maybe get back into the gym, go hiking, make sober friends. If I don’t stop now, I’m going to lose everything and I Can’t let that happen. I won’t let that happen.
Well done you lad for going 4 years, seems impossible looking at it now but I went to play pool last night at the pub and didn’t touch a beer which is a start.
I think british culture makes everything seem like you need a beer in hand but happiest people I’ve seen are ones who can know when stop or people who don’t drink at all.
Hearing from people like you gives me motivation as I like the football and with the euros coming I’m praying I don’t fail if I make it too then.
Sounds like we’re at a very similar point in what we want to achieve and the journey we’re on. Hopefully it works for both of us and we can break the cycle and find out there’s more too life!
Good to see you coming back for replies bro. Ive found it really good posting in the daily check in thread! Would be good to see you on there.