Morning all and happy Saturday
I wrote my diary now and realised an important thing which I would like to share in case it resonates with someone. I wrote something like:
Often, I don’t feel well after I ate sweets. I feel like if my stomach is swollen. It’s paradoxical that it doesn’t stop me from eating more, instead I feel like that my belly is fat and so nothing matters and I end up eating more and more sweets.
It seems that my issue with binging/over eating comes from how I feel at the moment. If I feel any kind of discomfort I try to kill the feeling by eating. It’s like nothing matters anymore so why wouldn’t I have at least the one thing which makes me happier (food), but without realising that in reality it’s this one thing what makes me feel the bad way at first place.
It reminds me my addiction to alcohol, when I was using it as a coping mechanism to get away from depression and anxiety, not knowing that I am depressed and anxious because I drink alcohol. Never ending cycle it was.
I wish that me realising the above would change my relationship with food and stop me from acting silly. But who knows how much I will remember when my cravings take over. It always feel like my brain is frozen and disabled to think about anything else but food and me eating it
@Jana1988 If the current situation reminds you of your previous experience with alcohol addiction, is there anything that helped you overcome your alcohol addiction that might work now?
My new Fitbit came! I’m hoping to get a walk in to make my count 3/7 today. But it is very hot here and there is a heat advisory. I’m hoping I can go just before dark and it will be 80s instead of high 90s.
@CATMANCAM Finger’s crossed for your day @Kareness The heat and humidity have been so abysmal the last few weeks over here that I actually put running on hold and just did walks very early in the morning when it was somewhat tollerable. Navigating all that is sometimes a bit of a hassle. I hope the weather at your place will cool down a bit soon.
291 sugar
155 UPF
29 gluten
29 dairy
Was at a garde party yesterday. Lots of triggering foods. I did not care about those as I bring my own food for these kinds of occasions. But I’ve eaten more of my own stuff than I would have withouth all the triggers all around me. Interesting and a good reminder to bring more of my own food, as I’d rather eat more rice salad than eat something triggering or spend the event ridden by cravings.
Unfortunately not. With alcohol I had something what I would call epiphany. One day everything just came together, I realised how a horrible person I am when drunk and I was so disgusted by myself that I stopped drinking from day to day. And longer I stayed sober - better it felt and longer away from alcohol I finally realised how many issues which I had were caused by it.
I was trying to stop drinking unsuccessfully for three long years and I even stopped believing I ever can get there. And then one bad night and guilty morning after was all I needed. But I can’t tell why it suddenly happened there and then.
I was hoping that I could have such random realisation with Ed too but so far nothing… Maybe I need more exhausting time to get there hahaha
Although I can’t say I am totally unsuccessful because I did get over bulimia and got stuck with binging instead which I much more prefer to be honest. It’s cheaper and less disgusting And on serious note - less harmful.
I am really not an early morning person, and enjoy evening walks. But this heat wave will last through tomorrow so I doubt I will get a walk in until it’s over! I thought about my parent’s air conditioned apartment building where there is a treadmill. That is one possibility but definitely a hassle.
@Jana1988 Honestly that all sounds like progress to me. You are recoverying from alcohol addiction. You are recovering from bulimia. Now you are recoverying from binge eating. These things need time. As long as you keep at it, try new ways out, stay kind and honest with yourself. In my book you are moving in the right direction @Sissychris39 Congrats on three weeks!!! @Kareness The treadmill does not sound great but compared to the other options it might be the one that will work out best at this particular moment.
I am now 3rd day without binging. I over ate on chocolate on Saturday and Sunday night but I didn’t binge it, which is nice. Now I have IBS pain in my stomach thanks to it, which always makes me reconsider the actions and reminds me of how bad sugars are for me if in big amount
@acromouse well done for getting through the garden party congrats on 30 days no gluten or dairy @Sissychris39 look at you go! Congrats on 3 weeks
61 days no takeaways.
57 days no ice cream.
0 days no sugar, no crisps, no binge-eating.
I couldn’t sleep last night again. My addict was really in my head…‘it’s Sunday night, you can start fresh tomorrow, it’s a new week’…‘you only have the final left to watch of the show you’ve been watching, then you can start again’.
Feeling a little defeated at the moment, but I won’t give up. I’m currently at 17hrs for no sugar, crisps, or binge-eating. I had the healthy lunch again after therapy.
Good morning, I am still on 0 days in binge eating. Yesterday was quite bad and I really binged on chocolates through the day and in the evening. The sugars must have some demon in them
As always, I am considering to say goodbye to sweets for once and always, but I am so much surrounded by them, that I am finding it almost impossible. I remember that I stayed away from them for over a month, but it’s such a distance memory! Never achieved it again. But it felt good back then. Not only the success but generally my body benefitted in many positive ways
Anyways, wishing to everyone a very nice Wednesday Shall today bring you where you want to be
and happy Saturday 
congrats on 30 days no gluten or dairy 
Nice job!
Shall today bring you where you want to be 
