30 months today. Life is good. AA has taught me to be grateful for all the things I do have, rather than envious of the things I don’t.
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full 72 hours sober
i kept soo busy
3 loads of londry
babysat
shopped for me
ran errinds with a friend
im freakin beat but not in the wrong so thats good
good day
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@Englishd WOOHOO on 30 MONTHS!! Thats incredible!!
Day 36.3 check in. Woke up feeling like blah and still feel like blah… I dont really feel like trying to fix the blah feeling so I am just gonna sit and observe it and let it be … tomorrow is a new day.
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I learned in meditation that you are just supposed to recognize the feeling and say it’s name. Blah. Blah blah blah blah. Blah. There now it’s passed. Now time for some TV and a little more blah. 
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Aww you always make me laugh! Thanks!! 
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LOVE IT!!! Awesome numbers & congratulations girl!!! You’ve worked so friggin hard 
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Woo hoo! 2 1/2 years is fucking awesome Derek!!
You’re such an inspiration!! Look how far you’ve come, a family and a house and it only gets better.
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Congrats on 30 months of sobriety, truly inspirational.
Blessings and sobriety!
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Day 545. Thinking about heading into Monday and what I’ve got going on, and feeling sad that I can’t do everything I want to do. I just have too many interests, and it’s hard to say no. At the same time, I’m thankful I have those interests, they keep my mind buzzing with energy and motivation.
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Day 28! Woo woo!
Getting pretty bored up here in my apartment *sigh
Honolulu is on lockdown til the end of the month. I think I have to go take a walk down the city streets soon.
My husband has been sober with me all this time. He doesn’t have a problem with drinking, but he quit to be supportive. His 50th birthday is next week and he said he is gonna have some rum and coke. This of course set my mind going. Maybe I could just celebrate one day and go back to being sober the next day, easy! I swear, I’ve went around and around in my head about it. At first, I was talking myself into it, but the more days pass I’m talking myself out of it.
Almost to a month. 31 days will be the longest stretch of sobriety I’ve had in years.
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I feel you. I had that too when I had my new job. I felt like I wasn’t good enough, like I fooled them by saying I could do it 
And ready is good, complacent you can do without 
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I was reading that once you become a little overwhelmed during quarantine that is a really good sign. It means that you’ve managed to fill your time and keep your mind active. Your week just got a lot less blah.
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@Nvbookthief, feeling better now I hope?
Glad to read you’re doing fine @sylentwar, congratulations with the milestone. I think our soberdates are close to eachother 
Venting is a good thing @Maria. Always! And this forum is a good place for it. Don’t hesitate to do so. I’m sorry you feel this way. If you need someone to talk in Dutch you may always PM me. I found it easier to talk to someone in Dutch, English limits me. Hope today is a better day for you Maria
Congratulations @Shoyu 
2 months!!
And one week for you @Turtlefan 
Well done!
A few houres and then…one week @Dolse71! 
@Misokatsu, that’s so hard, difficult and sad But you are there for her 
@Englishd cheering for you! 
30 months! Congratulations!!
Ooops, there he is…the addictive brain trying to convince you to use/drink. Don’t listen to it, it’s a lying bastard 
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Day 143! Today was definitely an improvement, but still feeling a little more down than general
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Definitely a better day today
- Last night I couldn’t connect at all with only friend I’ve seen in person for 7 weeks now. Again she complained she wanted the old me who was so much more fun, outgoing and colloquial with a few drinks in me. Hearing that in turn made me more sombre and closed. Negative feedback loop. Makes me feel very alone. And for the first time seriously considering if I could maybe just have one or two, just with her… I know I can’t. I won’t. Going for a ride instead. Sober and clean. Have a good day all. Love from Amsterdam. Pic is from yesterday.
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Thank you love! it was prven again indeed it is good to vent. going against the fear of being rejected. I also reached out in a patient group regarding my meds, i think they have something to do with it. my body is not used to taking any meds at all. I had to nights of no sleep, lot of tears that help me in the end accept my condition and I cannot promis that I stay clean but I diverted the urge to do destructive things or binge or har my body. And I am so happy about that… guess it was a day of building sober muscles without realising it. Thank you for the offer to be able to reach out. I might pick you up on that one.
Hope you have a good day.
So far still sober and the sun is out!
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Thank you all. for reaching out to me. I am happy that I did, even though it scares me to be in the position of feeling rejected, my perpetual struggle @sylentwar waffle on you thank you!
@Mno yep… guess this shift needs time, from me to accept for myself but especially the outer world for them to see some parts of me changed and I need support now sometimes. and maybe in time it will take new people in my life for me to feel save enough to accept this
@Flamestar thank you for the beautiful quote. we will find a new tribe in sobriety right? in whatever shape or form it might come.
For now indeed the accepting @Fargesia_murielae , if only accepting the change and slowly giving up the beleive that one day I wake up, feel my old self again and pack my back to climb everest… that was my plan 3 years ago when all started to change… other mountain peaks will come.
for now I decided to lower the medication to acceptable level and wait for a doktor to stop after this crisis is over. will take woken nights for granted and use this irritability from lack of sleep as my griss for the mill meditation practice.
at least I can be trusted around sharp edges again and do some work therapeutic work on my furniture again
Thank you so much and have a good day you all!
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