My laptop screen is very cracked
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I mostly remember stuff like how to present myself, ask for directions, order food and kids stuff like banana or tree and numbers 
I wish I had keept it up, but maybe I should start doing that 
I actually didnāt plan to write anything in check in today. And itās eve here so I guess it doubles as a check out. Day 37. This will probably be another grumpy post, my last ones havenāt been to much pink and sunshine (Itās a Lilly Pulitzer quote)
āEverything is possible with sunshine and a little pinkā
Iām having another crappy day again, my foot hurts really bad and is difficult to walk on. And Iāve got menstrual cramps from hell. Weāve been grocery shopping today, and I found a new store in the neighbor village that have groceries from other countries. Unfortunately in a very limited sortiment so Iāll keep going to my usually one in another village a little more far away.
But at least I managed to find one of my favorite candies the Turkish lokum rose flavored,and soms other things Iāve been missing.
Also because the weather wonāt be good on my trip to the ocean and my cousins first communion on Friday, hubby promised me that weāre going with the kids on a city weekend when heās on vacation in two weeks. So I should actually be really happy. But Iām not, itās strange and I feel really unreasonable and ungrateful.
Hopefully itās a better day tomorrow, and Iāll be my ordinary happy Pink sparkling Chattering Disney delight.
Wishing yāall a wonderful day.
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I can completely relate to thisā¦ and itās still so āearly daysā for me. I feel like Iām on shaky ground right now, but I was thinking that as the days pile up the shakiness will go away. I guess it could always crop up, thoughā¦ Probably not helpful to think about that. One day at a time, one moment at a timeā¦ 
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If weāre sober now weāre doing it already, just donāt stop doing it.
I sit here now in yet another meeting thinking I want to be sober, I want to be be sober, I want to be sober. I AM SOBER, Iām here now Iāve just gotta stay here. There is no justification to pick up.
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Shake off your shaky ground right now!! 
One day at a time, one moment at a time is right. Iāve heard about folks going back to their DOC after years of sobriety. It scares me, but inspires me to be on my guard. I am worried about not having had to deal with a major event since my journey started ā¦ but thereās no reason to make up scenarios to fake worry about today. 
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Crap. Another thing to add to my list 
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I just want to say high, Iāve been a bit unsociable sorting out my shit hole of a mind. Hope youāre well.
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I googled your question and found thousands of replies with various instructions on how to recapture youthful happiness. SInce you asked the question, I will give you my two cents worth on happiness seeking behaviors.
Though we canāt be kids again, we can still find joy. A friend of mine says she finds happiness in dancing to music. Engage fully in what you do. Eckhart Tolle says he is āenjoying himselfā by being in joy each moment with himself. We choose how we feel, though at times, it doesnāt feel that way. I am also a seeker of happiness and joy. I donāt have it everyday (Did I really have it all the time as a child? NO!) I get glimpses of happiness by being near children and animals. I continue to search for those moments in all aspects of my daily living. Being mindful and attentive to each moment. Being intentional, seeking those moments. I practice what I hope will bring me happiness. I hope you may create those feelings of happiness.
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@C_8 thank you! No fake worrying - you are right, and @Dolse71 thank you too. I am sober, all I have to do is stay here.
If itās a destination, Iām already there. Just need to stay, and take shelter if the tremors / shaky ground comes, but not imagine them coming and pre-plan my demise!
Thank you both.
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donāt get me started on Eckhart Tolle, I love it 
. Well right now in this moment of consciousness I do 
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Awesome typo there Paul
HELLO!! Iām glad youāre still here.
I donāt think youāre unsociable at all, but I understand. You must take care of the shit first. Itās not a nice fragrance to engulf yourself in
Also, thereās maybe only a day or two a week where I really feel like posting anything, but. I do read every day. Take care dude!
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seriously my spelling is that bad I keep reading it and canāt even find a mistake 
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You wanted to say āHighā
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Hey - how do I get involved in the online meet please?
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I do remember when I was a kid. I was terrified about ending up in hell. Iām more free now, even if I stil have to pay my bills and care for my kids. Iām still trying to grasp that Iām an adult, Iām free and that god wonāt be mad if Iām having gummibears for breakfast or goes up at lunch time. Or that I actually donāt have to go to church to make up for my sins (which might be like a million by now )
But I do get your point. I just do the things I have to do and make sure thereās time to build pillow houses, eat cereals and watch cartoons, dancing in the rain, jump in puddles, or swing in the playground. I just do what the kids does and things I like
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Thanks for your response, makes sense.
Coincidentally, I look to my dog a lot when I feel bogged down by these things. Not just because he makes me happy or because heās my best friend. Its because he is so full of joy. Thereās no worry in him at all. He just wants to play and nap, to enjoy himself and spend time with me. My dog is love on 4 legs.
Tomorrow doesnāt matter to him, nor does an hour from now. Heās in the āright nowā. I think Tolle said something about that in āthe power of nowā, about animals not being burdened by the concept of time. I have that book but never got too far into it.
I heard Prince say something about it once too. About how time isnāt real, number age is not real. You have one birthday, you are born once, and from there you continually evolve and grow. Iām paraphrasing and he delivered it much more eloquently and powerfully.
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I always see it as my way and the normies way. Iām special and probably crazy according to some people if they see me in my comfort zone. But I donāt hate that. I am who I am, not a single fuck I can do about it except embrace it. I am me and I am special.
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