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Thank you!
I’m at work right now. I have to hold back my tears. I don’t know why I want to cry. I feel like everything is fucked up. My emotions, my ability to ever love someone again with having to be scared I’ll end up in this situation again…
This does make me crave a drink or 20… the other bad side of this.
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Well, you know that is a bad idea.
I have been through a few myself, 
; and it does absolutely feel like your world is completely upside down. BUT, you do get through it. I promise… you learn from each relationship, be it friends or lovers; that’s basically what life is!
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Thanks for the wise words 
i could use a hug.
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3.75 years today. I have been sober since 12-14-16. Not a real milestone, but hey, it IS something!
Typical school morning during Covid of getting my daughter on and off her zoom classes – I think I bruised my leg jumping out of bed where I was reading when I realized she was no longer on her Zoom lesson! I am a bit stressed not knowing who is helping her with her band assignments. She has an aide sit in on her class with her (not sure how that helps on Zoom) and then what is supposed to happen, how does she get her work done?? I am trying to email her teacher and find out…
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Day ☆17☆.
I had a ‘speed networking session’ via Zoom this morning for work. Normally I would be shy and anxious but I wasnt at all. It was actually a pleasant/fun experience. I’m amazed at how my anxiety has dissipated since not drinking. My sleep is SO much better too.
My daughter and I painted her bedroom this weekend, it turned out so good! I love having the motivation to do these mini projects now, whereas I only did what was required to maintain everything before. Next is to work on the boxes in the basement. I know there’s so much I can throw away.
The weather is wonderful outside today. Low humidity, breezy, sunny and in the 70s. Fall is my favorite time of year so I’m looking forward to it!
Everything is just so different without the toxicity of booze controlling my life. I feel an inner peace which is amazing. Have a great week everyone! We got this!! 
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Oh man, withdrawal from venlafaxine is the worst! Even accidentally skipping a day puts me totally out of commission.
I really hope you can get get your meds sorted soon!
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Arthritis in a finger is killing me (think it’s gout). Left my wallet at work 
can use a get cash option on my banking app for emergencies, did but their only atm is empty ffs.
Normally stuff like that would really annoy me and would prob say fuck it I’ll get some beer.
Nope, have some change at home and going to the shop to get some paracetamol although could do with some stronger pain relief but will be fine and it probably won’t be as sore tomorrow … hopefully
Keep checking in 
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It’s Day 4 for me. I’ve slept a lot. I promised myself I’d take myself to the cinema yesterday to see the first film I’ve wanted to see on a big screen in years, if I got through the weekend sober, and I did, I enjoyed it too Days 4-7 are usually where I lose my way, but spending time on here is so inspiring, so I thank you all so much for your posts. It’s bed time for me now, once I’ve given the cats their treats and taken my meds, by the morning I will be half a week clean from Cocaine.
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- Got my blood results back-my liver levels are stable (thank god) but I got an ANA test and it came back positive. Have to see a rheumotologist. Does anyone have any experience with autoimmune disorders? I’m assuming it has something to do with the weird red blotches I have on my legs and I bruised all over my body when I was drinking but I thought that was just a sign of my cirrhosis. Any info would be great…trying to get in with a rheumatologist this week
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Christmas lutefisk is a part of our Christmas tradition. Or used to be. Some people still have but I think they’re getting fewer. I hear that the cooking smells downright horrible and the actual fish is quite bland. I think I was in highschool (in the last millennium) when I asked my dad if we could cook lutefisk for Christmas. Just to get the experience. “Sure you can!” he said. “But you don’t get to cook it on my property.”
Point made 
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Thank you!
I do know that you can have positive result for antinuclear antibodies without having a disease. Many folks have positive ANA results without disease so it can be common. Certain meds can cause positive results too. Glad you’ll be seeing a rheumatologist though, to get some answers and run further tests. Are you still having the bruising/patches? I’ll be thinking of you!
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Checkin 30 Day 
I did it again after a long time. I am so happy . I was so determined that I walked this road without looking back. I will continue like that…
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Well done!
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Ahh thanks for letting me know that-My mom said the same thing about a lot of people being positive which is a sigh of relief! No more bruising…that all went away when the drinking stopped, just these weird red splotches that exist on my legs. They don’t itch, it’s truly the weirdest thing. 
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Great job ! I hit 30 days not long ago, for the first time in God alone knows how long !!
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Just hit the BIG 90 today too!!
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Hi everyone. I’m off to bed shortly, but I wanted to check in. I’m coming up on 33 days in a few minutes, so I’m pretty pleased about that. I had to go through the beer / wine / soft drinks / water aisle at the store today, and I don’t really recall having even looked at the beer and wine, I just slipped past that part without noticing.
I’m pleased about that, too.
It certainly has been warm here today. I felt kind of badly for the three guys who were installing my new windows in my flat today, but what can you do. It never ceases to amaze me how many people here in Europe DON’T use window screens… having every bug in creation flying into my apartment while I have the TV or lights on is something that drives me nuts. Still, they aren’t all that common here… but I certainly like my window screens !!
Other than that, just the usual work…
33 days… a good start, I think.
Goodnight all.
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