Please keep us posted! Hoping it’s just a cold.
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Universal health insurance. We MUST get it in this country. It is a travesty. At least you’re doing the right thing with those numbers. There’s got to be a heart specialist who will work out a plan with you. You’re too important!
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Thank you!!! Me too!
Mmmm…I don’t know about funny. It’s more scary and worrisome than anything when you consider what’s at stake.
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A sponsor is a person who guides you through the steps. Preferably of the same gender. Sponsors are not therapists, bankers, taxis or any other type of professional. I would definitely not ask that woman to be your sponsor. Generally a sponsor has been through the steps and has solid sobriety. Definitely talk to some of the men in your home group. They will get you squared away.
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D 844
I woke up this morning and watched my recording of the presidential debate last night. What can I say that hasn’t been said? Complete and utter shitstorm. I needed a bath after that one. What an embarrassment.
Additionally, my back feels the worst its felt in about a year. Usually I can pinpoint what caused it, but I’ve got nothing this time. I even went easy on my lifting yesterday and didn’t do anything out of the ordinary, and it felt fine going to bed last night.
I’m not stuck in bed, or in excrutiating pain (just major discomfort), and I am not seeing the lateral pelvic shift that happens when its real bad. So hopefully not a full-on aggravation, and hopefully doesn’t get worse…but it definitely doesn’t feel like it’s just a muscular issue.
In my praying I begged to not take a step back in my healing. My back starting to get better gave a HUGE improvement to my mental state and I finally felt like I was starting to get my life back, I had hope for the first time in years. I can’t lose that now, please no.
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I feel you man! The uncertainty of not knowing really sucks! I hear you when you say it affects your mental state… Some days I can hardly feel my pain and my mental state is so much better and I feel happy like maybe its gone forever!!.. Wishful thinking… 
Maybe we should start journaling to try and figure out what causes the pain to be better or worse?? Mine seems to be all over the place… Sorry you are going through all that!!! Hope it gets better!! I havent prayed in a while, maybe we should try that again… 
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Day 585 and 69 smoking
Enjoying a week off work right now and the rest is great. I really need it and I’m totally happy just sitting around, drinking tea and reading.
I watched the first debate this morning and what a rollercoaster of emotions that was! What I found most interesting about it was my reaction to all of these emotions. Typically I would get angry, frustrated etc. I would hold onto this negative emotion for longer than I should, get frustrated with other people, with myself also. But that didn’t happen. Although the emotions were there washing around, I was able to feel them, process them, to some extent understand them. I’ve seen this recently in other areas of my life also, situations that previously may have caused an undesirable emotional response that I have handled differently and better as a result.
I find it harder to notice the improvements these days, it’s a lot more gradual and subtle, but this is one for sure. I didn’t expect a TV debate to help me realise it.
Have a great day folks 
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Day 110 clean and sober today. Just got done dropping off my uniforms to my old boss and to make amends for the past. He said I look 100% better than when he last saw me 4 months ago. I came there to apologize and make things right, not necessarily to get my job back but to also pick up my tools. A little bummed because he said he has no idea what happened to my tools which I paid around $3500 for and I didn’t even get an apology from him or any solution. Oh well I guess at least my side of the street is clean and I’ve done my part. Not going to continue to be upset by the tool thing, my life is transitioning into a brand new phase and that’s not part of who I’m becoming or the dreams I’m pursuing so… goodbye and good riddance lol. Have a great day today everyone, love you guys!
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Ice. Ice. Ice. Ice.
I’ve always been a back pain sufferer. Mine comes and goes nothing a chiropractor can’t help straighten out though. When I’m feeling better I use to go back to lifting the weights too. I’ve always said what you said. “I went easy on them” next thing you know the back is hurting again. I’m done with the weights now. Took me 60 years to figure that out. But I’m done with the weights. Doing Pilates now. Course I’m an old man now and I just don’t need the hassle of maybe picking up a dumbbell wrong and wrenching my back again. Be careful out there.
Back pain sucks!!
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Congrats @Luckyredz we have the same sobriety date!!! I’ve been feeling a little sad lately too and I think it’s part of the healing process. Keep up the good work bro!!!
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Well done you, for going to your old work place, that must have been hard!
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You have such a positive attitude about that!! I am loving it!! 
Heck yes!! THIS is a beautiful thing!!!
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Thank you @anon27760155 I asked God to walk in before me and I believe I carried my self well. Have a great day!!!
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Thank you so much @Clarity I really appreciate it!!! Definitely not the man I was before and it’s awesome! Have a great day today!!!
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You have no idea how much I appreciate you! Always so kind and thoughtful! Thank you!
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Day 45 ; it goes well overall, normally I don’t like dessert very much. But nowadays I have a constant desire to eat dessert. I hope it will pass 
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Day 11- I have a pain condition there is no cure for and they won’t prescribe anything that helps. Usually I drink through it to numb the pain. But I didn’t this time. I just stayed in bed and suffered. I don’t know if this is a workable situation but I did it this time and it feels like a tie between two days wasted in bed I could have been at least partially productive AND a win that I didn’t drink and in 3 days I’ll have 2 weeks sober.
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