@Misokatsu , @anon28001181 , @apes2020 , @Joy , @C_8 thank you very much 
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Update from last post
So apparently this teen has been at the psychiatric care at the hospital for three weeks. The mother (mu husbandās ex wife) has spent the night there and found out that they doesnāt want to keep here because sheās not in bad enough condition to stay. The foster care home sheās been placed at have said that theyāre not going to take her back, and wants nothing to do with her anymore. The mother doesnāt want her home. And since my husband doesnāt have legal custody he canāt do shit. So he chased the social services until he got a hold of the lady who has been in charge for this teen,since another social worker has told him that they are looking for a new foster care home for her. When he finally got in contact with the lady in charge they paused all actions and are now trying to get the mother to sign a paper for shared custody or sign it over to my husband. From Monday this teen will be placed in residential care home for teens and theyāll introduce her to our family even if sheās been here a lot before. And if the mother wonāt sign the papers the social services is going to arrange something so the teen will stay with us anyway. So from Monday my husband will be off work for at least two weeks until this mess is cleared.
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Congrats on 90 @Chiron . I too reset on day 88, so you are an inspiration to me from here on my day 35, I wonāt feel Iāve achieved anything until I hit 90 this time, so it must feel really good to be there 
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Checking in sober and cigarette free 
Keeping things simpleā¦ went to 1 online AA meetings today, which went well. Going to another one later on. I think this is something I need to immerse myself in to be more successful in my recovery. Wishing everyone strength 
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So itās Friday, and Iāve got 35 days now. It feels really surreal, because this is probably the most sober Iāve ever been in my life, because even when I quit Cocaine for 88 days previously, I was still drinking back then thinking it was okay because it was legal atleast. Iāve got over 2 months sober from Alcohol now too. Itās also day 6 of no binge-eating, so Iāve literally only got healthy habits now. Spending time on here, getting back out walking twice a day, and the DBT skills group and PD support groups all seem to be healing me. Itās hard not to focus too much on the future, like getting back to work one day and buying property again in the future if working works out for me at any point. I mean I havenāt even sold my current place yet or got out of debt by any means.
Had a dream that I smoked a cigarette last night, I woke from it so angry at myself until reality properly kicked in and I could taste that I hadnāt actually smoked. Itās getting towards 6 months since I quit cigs as well so strange that it was that that my dreams chose to relapse on. It was a stressful dream though, more of a nightmare. Iāve always had extremely vivid nightmares, ever since I was a child, itās something I really didnāt miss whilst I was using, but still I wonāt use. My subconscious it obviously doing some work to get through trauma related stuff, so itās healthier to let it do so.
Itās probably an unhealthy way of thinking, but I decided to ātreat myselfā to another pumpkin spiced Frappucino from Starbucks with oat milk, because it was Friday, and to diminish the binge-eating urges I was having.
I am really going to try to do some journalling this weekend, I really miss the self-reflection that writing gives, I havenāt been able to do it since I got clean, but Iād love to get back into it as another healthy habit to do sober.
I donāt have any viewings this weekend, the agents have asked if I would drop the price by another Ā£5K, but if I do that, I wouldnāt be able to clear all of my debts, and I donāt like the thought/stress of that, Iāve already reduced by Ā£10K since I first put it on the market in February, itās really good value as it is, but Covid is truly throwing a spanner in the works. Gah.
I like being back in a routine. I like being completely sober. I want to stay consistent with it all now, which is where Iāve previously struggled, but I have a revived sense of determination and can only pray for the strength to keep going, one day at a time 
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Havenāt been on much lately because life is just busy & Iām trying to be more purposeful about how I spend my time. But today my counter turned over to 400 days and I just wanted to say thank you to all of you whoāve played a part of my journey. I probably wouldnāt be sober without this app!
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@CATMANCAM Thank you for the congrats. You will definitely get back where you want to be. Youāre doing really well so far with all of the habits that youāre trying to master. I think doing some journaling this weekend is such a great idea.
@Quit4myDaughter Congrats on your 200 days! Youāre doing amazing!
@crystalclear great job on your 400 days! Thatās really awesome!
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Congratulations
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That is very impressive Cristel.
So happy for ya 
What a great way to start the weekend.
Woo Hoo 
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Today is just a pretty bad day.
I think I want to cut those 4 years out of my life before Iāve processed everything. And especially the last few months. Things god really bad then.
On the 29th Iāve got my first appointment with a therapist. Ever. Really hope that helps me.
My ex has emotionally abused me quite a bit. Made me feel like I was nothing. And yet somehow I still wonder how sheās feeling/doing. BUT I mso fucking sure she doesnāt wonder that about me.
So I beat myself up over why I still care for her.
I need support so bad.
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What a day your having, makes you grateful to be able to deal with it sober.
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how did I miss this 
Iāve been watching you grow from the sidelines and I like what I see, Congrats on the big 90 sober friend
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This is getting ridiculous Iām running out of superlatives for all these awesome people today, 
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I hate to admit it but honestly Iāve been on my way to raise that glass more than once today.
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Aww thank you! I appreciate that. 
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stop talking bollocks thereās nothing there for You.
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Hang tough, sweetie. Youāll need your wits with you navigating the process with your niece.
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Thatās so great! Well done!!! 
Love it!! Congratulations 
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