Day 60!!! 
2 months yāall! Iām so blessed to be here, considering the dark hole Iāve been making my way out of. Iām happy and at peace. God and The NA program has been a life saver for me! My sponsor will give me my 60 day key tag today at the noon meeting! Iām soooooo excited. I just want to give each and every one of yāall hope today. Thereās so much beauty in sober life if we want to see it. Never forget that you are loved and worthy and powerful. You truly can do ANYTHING you set your minds to. If nobody has told you today, I LOVE yāall! 
have a great Tuesday!!!
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Day 2.17
Currently out for a mountain bike ride. Packed āDraculaā with me to sit and read in the surrounding nature. Used a rucksack I hadnāt used in a while. Thought it was empty when I tossed my book in and threw it on my back. Just used it to sit on, as the ground is wet, and heard empty beer cans being crushed under my backside. Today is a lovely contrast from what a day out used to be like. āDraculaā may be scary, but it has nothing on a life trapped by alcohol.
Also, if I had woke up hungover today, I wouldnāt have been able to enjoy the insane beauty of autumn today. I donāt remember the colours being so intense last year. So filled with gratitude right now.
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Day 612
As the winter draws in Iām beginning to pick up on a few warning signs. Not so much regarding drinking, but my general mental health. Iām isolating again, not replying to messages, avoiding people and certain situations. My mood is low, as are my energy levels. And negative thoughts are becoming gradually more intense as each day passes.
Winter is always like this for me, but coming off the back of 2020 so far, and with no clear end in sight to the madness, it feels all the more important that I address these things early.
Iāve started meditating again, aiming for every morning and night. Iāve managed about a week so far and have seen some success. I find consistency is key for me with meditation. Doing it every now and then doesnāt really help unless itās a quick SOS if I feel panic building (which thankfully I havenāt had for a while).
Iām also going to read the Recovery Dharma book having seen a discussion about it in another thread. It should arrive later today. Although Iām always engaged with self improvement these days, I havenāt done anything specifically addiction/recovery related for a while. I confess to being complacent in this regard.
Diet wise Iām ok but I have put on a few kilos over lockdown which I want to shift. My target is 3 gym sessions a week and a ban on cheat meals for a couple of months. And I could do with drinking less coffee.
I also intend to buy a SAD lamp. Oh, and Iāve removed all the time wasting/social media apps from my phone.
Hopefully all of this will help, and itās all very achievable (no unrealistic goals or things outside of my control).
Have a great day folks 
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Thank you Geoff. I am slowly starting to see that. The girl who spoke at the meeting had 31 years. She looked at me and goes man, my 1st year, god was I something else, I was all over the place and miserable. I got a good chuckle out of it, I was like yup me too me too
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So true!
I just had to re-deactivate Facebook again. Social media is a huge time waster for me. Good idea on deactivatinh messenger as well. People feel entitled to having access to you, itās so annoying.
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Is a SAD lamp a sunrise lamp alarm clock?
Oh thatās so much tragedy and sadness. I guess some people would prefer not to have to come to terms with that.
There is no right way to grieve, you can only do what you need to do and trust that others will find what they need too. Lighting lanterns sounds like a lovely idea.
I love that idea that we all hold different puzzle pieces. We all have our own memories, shared experiences and perspectives.
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Just that messenger ping noise still gives me anxiety if I hear it from a persons phone if Iām out in public on the tram or something lol 
I really dislike it. And yes you are spot on, such a waste of time 
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Hows journaling Coming along?? 
You can get ones that are alarm clocks or just the lamp. Iām thinking of getting just a lamp. Iāve had a look online and there are lots of options and price ranges so Iām a bit confused about whatās best?
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Funny you should mention it, I only ever heard about them literally 2 or 3 days ago and I did some research on Amazon myself to see what a the fuss was aboutā¦they are quite pricey and Iām not sure yet if it will help me. But they still seem to intrigue me! 
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Me too 
ā¦ This is why Iāve come back to TS to recalibrate and get my mind right. The weather change and time change definitely can contribute to a mental imbalance. I love how solution oriented you are about it though! Meditation, exercise, journaling, etcā¦are apart of my solution and will climb us out of the funk.
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Welcome to the forum Holly. Keep checking in and reach out when you need to, there is a wonderful community and lots of support on offer here 
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Iāve been consistent! Which is important and the daily brain dump is therapeutic. Iād say me and journaling are getting pretty serious. 
lol
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Exactly the same here. Iām happy to spend Ā£30/40 on one, but for all I know I could just be sat infront of a normal lamp. And the reviews are really hit and miss. It could be doing nothing. And then the next tier is more like Ā£100+ which seems a lot for something that might not help 
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Let me know how you find it. I was quite sceptical about CBT (individual) and Recovery Dharma on video callsā¦ But I actually like it. You can make yourself comfy, if you have a tough time youāre in a safe place and if it gets too much you can just get up and go make a cup of tea!
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Yes girl this makes me so happy to hear 
ā¦ Itās like we are our personal assistants to our monkey minds and we get it in check every morning by brain dumping all the important stuff that we normally brush to the side to deal with later etcā¦ Itās such a simple tool to use to literally get our life in orderā¦ I even went and purchased fancy new pens to use for it lol
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The only certainty is change, friend. Feelings come and go. The more we want to feel differently, the more we end up focusing on how we are feeling and that usually makes it worse!
Whatās the plan for Friday?
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We should just buy puppy dogs and they will do the job for us lol but be super cute while at it and also bonus morning puppies love and kisses lol I vote the puppies over expensive lamp alarms 
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