I’ve not looked anywhere else yet but I’m going to say 272 and that’s impressive for us both 
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Day 5 sober. After my last relapse I was embarrassed to post here but again in the battle. I am passing some days with my elderly parents
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I guess I have the same problem with chocolate 
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it’s definitely universal. BTW don’t stop posting, you give others courage to never give up. The only reason I am still here is bc of you bc after about my 50th relapse I thought I was pathetic and was the laughing stock of TS but I thought if you can show up and be honest then so can I. I can’t help you on your journey bc I don’t have the knowledge but I can definitely thank you for the part you have played in mine. 
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Day 627
I’ve been sticking to my new morning routine and it seems to be paying off. The SAD lamp is good, really helps to wake me up. I’ve noticed that my caffeine intake has halved without any specific effort. I just don’t feel as tired in the morning and I don’t spend most of my morning yawning. Really glad I bought one. The morning meditation is good aswell, helps to set the tone for the day. In general my mornings are more relaxed, no rushing around, plenty of self care in that first hour of the day. It’s making a difference.
I’m also really encouraged by the results I’m seeing from a regular meditation practice. Sure sometimes I can’t connect at all, but I don’t give in. Like anything it’s about being consistant and practice. Some days it just doesn’t click, but that’s fine. Working hard to recognise, honor, acknowledge and respond to my emotions as the arise.
I’ll gradually work more into my daily routine, but for now sorting out my mornings has been successful and I’m happy with that.
Have a great day folks
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@Bomdhil Do you switch off your favorite movie when the main character stumbles at the first third of it, or watch it throughout till the end because you are interested in the fight of a human not in the triumph of an unbeatable machine?
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Better to be in a battle and have difficult times than giving up. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.
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Checking in day 41.
Today is Remembrance Day in Canada to honour those who have served and continue to serve in the military. This was always a big day in our family, as my dad was military, and his dad (who died in WWII in 1944) and many others in our family. Oddly, it’s not a holiday here in this province, but is in many others in Canada. The first year I moved to this province from out east, dad had a heart attack on this date, and he joked it was because his daughter had to work on a day of honour lol. So I have always taken that day off as vacation ever since, and gone to the cenotaph to the ceremonies as we always did, as dad was a part of them. I had the day blocked since last year but because of the virus, no ceremonies. I will drop little guy off at his school, come back and do some work from home and take some time off and do the online ceremonies. I rambled a bit more about Remembrance Day than intended lol. Sentimental day today without dad. This day last year, we were flying back home from his funeral.
Hope you have a great sober day, fam.
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I am remembering what is was like on the revolving door of addiction. Feel worthless and pointless, so drink. Feel more worthless and pointless, so drink. You gotta stick a foot out the door and stop it turning. It sucks for a bit, your ankle is bruised, but u get a chance to step out and into your life. U gotta bite the bullet and get enough sober time that u start to feel a bit better.
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Not sure what you mean by dispute in papers but we do here in Canada have to defend our papers in front of jury (masters and phds). 
No exams at the end neither.
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Feel better man
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Nice one! I am thinking of switching my TS time from the morning to do something else for me instead.
Last month I was writing every morning while drinking coffee an hour (at least) before my usual wake time. This month I’ve sticked to the wake time, got a little late tho, but I chill on here instead. I excuse myself from not doing anything productive for myself because I tell myself this is part of my recovery, but really I sometime just chill here and feel I should’ve done some journaling, reflections, meditations or writing some papers I’m working on.
My problem now is really stupid. I havent restarted journaling since I got sober, and my last journal are full of confronting ideas I had when I was actively using and full of battles of thoughts about moderations or looking for what I need, etc. etc. So it’s like the journal of old me, but still a big part of me. I sometime feel triggered by it. So I open my computer and I am thinking about what can I start to write and I am not sure about what so I don’t start a new document. I named all my past journal by a different name, and now that I don’t know how to name it, I don’t start it. As I write this I find this is so stupid lol.
Well I guess now I am going to close TS and start that journal right now. 
Thanks for sharing and have a good day 
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282.…… I want to start off by saying thank you to all the veterans out there, and to anyone who is mourning there loved ones.
I have today off, things are kind of looking up with the gym we might be back open in the next week, I’m actually going to go in today to volunteer clean it. I’m probably going to get a jog in and relax, I need to start doing things out of my comfort zone again. I have been come to comfortable, or procrastinate, I finally did go and lift yesterday, but I’ll usually only do that go to work and then come home and maybe sometimes clean and run on the treadmill or just come hide up in my room. I want to say its bc of anxiety I’m not sure, but like I still have never went out for a jog because I am to worried about being seen, I haven’t even really taken many bike rides. Doing that to myself stops growth, and opportunities to keep becoming the version of myself. Nothing is going to fall into my lap sitting in my house, sure I’m doing more then before. But I still could do better
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I think spending time on TS in the morning is good, I still check it for 10/15 mins while I have coffee. This thread in particular has been an important part of my recovery so I like to check in even if I don’t feel like writing anything myself. But working other things in gradually is important too. I spent loads of my time on here early on and then gradually you find some balance as you introduce other actions to recovery.
I think journaling is a great idea. I’ve had it on my plan for a while now but haven’t managed to include it yet. I’m not going to force it but I do think it’ll be useful. And sticking to that regular wake up time is good. It makes the world of difference to me, just routine in general is very important. When my routine starts to slip it’s usually a red flag that there’s something I need to address.
Best of luck with the journal
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Day #75. I think I skipped yesterday posting entirely, though I did read a new - member, is that what we call each other?- who had a horrific story about a drunk driving accident that killed her wife. She, unfortunately, was the one behind the wheel. They’d been sober for 7 months before that. Those split decision twists of fate are sobering and humbling. There, for the Grace of God, go any of us, right? Gonna concentrate on relaxing - exercise, rest, reading, nutrition, knitting and sleep. Need desperately to recharge.
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I feel u, that happens to me when Im watching a movie or a serie and they look so good drinking wine or beer or a couple of martinis, I miss it… But not really the taste, it makes me remember when I start drinking when I was 15 and I believe that I was so cool for doing it! We are under a drinking culture, I live in México, and the people that dont drink is seen like boring.
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Get well asap my smober friend.
Blessings and sobriety!
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@Luisa53 I can totally relate to that. Where I live it’s completely normal to see mothers drinking beer at the playground at 11 am, in the restaurants beer is actually cheaper than water. It’s so intertwined with everyday life, one can get triggered a lot.
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Checking in on day 18. Feel great about the number of days but things have been difficult and I just wanna take a pill or two to take the edge off. 
🤦 I know that’s not the answer so I will not do that. I am going to keep myself busy and try to stay off my phone so I’m not tempted. My husband who is usually my biggest supporter, got drunk, and said some hurtful things to me. I’m glad I was sober and clear headed because it was him and my mom because she’s an alcoholic and to be honest I’m seeing he is too. I can’t use their irrational behavior as a reason to relapse. Have a great day TS folks.
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