Goodnight all… almost finished the Russian music video…
15 Likes
Day 2 going well
19 Likes
I love this
2 Likes
Samesies. …
Congratulations!! 8 months is amazing M just like you!!
Thank you for all your wonderful posts. Much love. 
3 Likes
- Checking out
The afternoon was better turned out I was hangry lol. I had worked out at the gym at my office so I went right to work and was super busy. Should’ve had a morning snack. I am happy to be working in the office again. Although it’s rough going back and one of my boys still homeschooling does make it difficult. I come home from work right to helping him while making dinner and whatever else needs to be done. Don’t get me wrong I love the busy life. But my body needs to adjust. Part of my job is helping others and it gives me great joy. I just need to remember I need happiness too and not to get too caught up other wise that leads to a downward spiral and I lose control which is no longer a option in my life. Being in control of my life keeps me sober. Before I had the mind set of never needing help but I had to realize asking for help is not a weakness. I also found out more people are willing to help then I thought. Just my bedtime thoughts. Have a good night all
25 Likes
Day 200 and something
Just using the website at the moment as my phone is still quite broken, but kinda usable so am putting off getting a new one. The phone is a bit of a metaphor for my life at the moment, I mean it works, it does the things it has to do, just about, but many of the fancier functions are no go. I am the same, I am sober, which of course is good, and I am plugging along with various things that I have to do, but not really feeling satisfied. I know life isn’t all rainbows, and even just chugging along without resorting to drinking is a big deal in itself. I am just tired of the simple act of living feeling hard for me. That I have to work at being happy. That unless I actively make effort all the damn time I slide into thinking really negatively. I am tired of being so sensitive that the tiniest thing I can make into a stick to beat myself with. And then I feel guilty because nothing particularly bad is happening, and I am being self-absorbed.
30 Likes
This whole feeling resonates with me so much! It can be exhausting paying the “motivation” rent everyday. I know exactly how you feel. I hope it gets better for you. Take that kind of stuff one day at a time as well…life is made hard to make us stronger people I suppose but sometimes I just want to be weak?
10 Likes
Hello Mitch.
You have pretty much described my mindset at the moment. Have been feeling really upbeat since stopping drinking. I don’t think that euphoric would be overstating it. I have really been bouncing. The last few days have been a bit underwhelming though. Just a bit average and normal. Dare I say it, just a bit dull. As you say, it feels like I’m doing something wrong. It’s certainly making me wonder what the point of it all is.
Not sure what the answer is.
I’m feeling a bit better today actually because I’m a bit busier in work so I feel like I have a bit more of a purpose.
I think I’m not seeing the contrast as sharply because I’m getting accustomed to feeling better. I’m forgetting what the hangovers, the lack of sleep, the anxiety and the clouded thinking all felt like.
I don’t know what to say. The best I can do is to tell you that you’re not alone.
9 Likes
Same goes to you, Fleur. Seems like there’s a bit of ‘meh’ going around at the moment. I’m sure these things are cyclic. Hopefully we’ll all be feeling tremendous again soon.
6 Likes
Thanks Tone!
Regardless of our DOC, they’re all far more cunning, baffling, and powerful than we are. If this were just a coping mechanism for me then I would only have the desire to act out on the bad days. I can get into broken thinking whether I just knocked it out of the park or when nothing noteworthy has happened at all. I’m an addict.
I read in the big book study I was just at tonight, "My old manner of life was by no means a bad
one, but I would not exchange its best moments for the worst I have now.’’
But sometimes it’s easy for me to neglect all the havoc I wrought while acting selfishly. It can even sneak up on me when I appear to be doing everything that my sponsor is telling me to do.
8 Likes
Day 16 in the house. Great day. Learning just to go with the flow. Excited to start my Yoga zoom classes tomorrow with my class. Good night all TS family. 1 day at a time!
29 Likes
Day 246.
A massive thank you for all of the “yay!” posts on my 8 months! It really makes me feel companioned on this journey - not home in my best sober clothes with no where to go! 
Tucking in early tonight. Beat from day 1 of 3 days of intense meetings. But also… relieved. As others have noted – there’s a sense of “meh” right now. And yes, like I’m somehow doing something wrong if life isn’t rosy. Whoever the Disney character is who waves her magic wand and makes everything enchanted seems to have left the building, and it must be my fault.
Maybe, though, I’ve just gotten used to this greener grass over here. My colleagues were talking over zoom about their plans to unwind tonight (avec spirits) – and I was suddenly hurtled into the past. The shame wake ups, fatigue, cravings, rationalizations, regrets. I’ll gladly forfeit the wine and take the absence of all that comes with it.
When I think hard about it all – there is still sweetness in a sober sucky day.
Sucky or no – we did it. Another one. Let’s go for another tomorrow. I know we can.
G’night all – super grateful for you. 
34 Likes
M. I’m so sorry I’m so late!
One day I don’t check in during the day and I miss one of my favorite Canadians. Ya?
Great big congratulations to you on your 8 months. I am so proud of you. You are doing so wonderful. And you are so worth it. Great work buddy 
8 Likes
No worries! I was feeling like the typically-apologetic Canadian, that I can’t dip down - across a border - and shovel your walks (we 
know our way around a snowy walk) while your back is blech!
Glad you are feeling better. And like I was saying, even if you have a sucky day? I would always choose to have you here than not. We just get to come as we are, around here. 
8 Likes
@M-be-free49 idk how the heck I missed it. But congrats on your 8 months and one day girl. So super proud of you and all that you accomplish.
7 Likes
Checking in day 24
Long day, honestly was a regular day, not bad nor good either, a little tired rn but didn’t want to go to sleep without checking in, I love u all❤, one day at a time.
24 Likes
