Sounds like a great idea if you can afford to give up the steady paycheck. Music is so healing in so many ways. I hope you get to follow your dream.
Sorry, I think I missed your celebration yesterday. Congratulations on your big 501.
Go for it!!
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This check made me smile so big!
Really happy for you.
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Thank you!
I moved back in with my parents so I don’t have that many bills to pay. Only my car, cell phone bill, Netflix, Spotify.
I hope I can figure out a way so I don’t have to sell my car cause I can’t afford it.
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1022 days alcohol free. Anxious as hell. Weird pains in my body always tweak me out… happy terrible Tuesday
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Happy for you Jenna. I understand the anxiety. Like many here I used to take benzos and drink loads at the airport and on the plane, trying to pass out while flying. However much I used it never worked out, and it got more on every flight I took. I can honestly say flying sober and clean is a huge benefit of being, well, sober and clean. It’s better to be present in the present as you can handle the present better when you are present. No joke. you’ll do fine. I have a good friend whose terrified of flying, we flew together a couple of times. She always tells upon entering she is afraid and asks to talk to the pilot. That’s always allowed and it helps her a lot. Anyway. Safe travels Jenna. I’m sure you’ll be fine.
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Congrats on 500 days!!!
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Look at that! Huge congrats Joseph!!
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Congrats on 500, welcome to the club 
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Way to go Joseph !
Congratulations on your 500 days. We going to need a bigger bus.
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Wow! Well done! 
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2 days and 6 hours! Feeling pretty good 
Today I went to Trier- Germany with some friends (we live in Luxembourg, so it’s not that far)
We had an amazing day!!!
I even tried to use the ridiculous amount of German I know 
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Congratulations! I agree. What a difference a month can make. Amazing really!
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Day 30.
Wednesday
6.55am
11 degrees
Going to work today. Masks now mandatory indoors at work. Bummer. On the bright side, i can get away with only eye make up now 
I’m actually still really looking forward to going to work. I really enjoy the woman I work with and my tasks are fun. I’m feeling fulfilled
@Dazercat e , I hope your feeling OK and its not playing on your mind. You will be fine. Your sober now, so that’s a huge difference to your health and body. Not long to go till June till your appointment. Something I just remembered, when I had my dogs, when ever I was sick or really unwell, my cavoodle knew it. She would come and sit right on my chest all the way up to my chin and just lay there staring at me with eyes that were pure love. She just knew. It blew my mind how emotional she was. So my point is, use Minnie as emotional internal health guide 
she may have to push all the kittys away from you to get to you first lol 
stay strong friend 
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Got another day sober. Had a drink dream last night just to remind me how disgusting and guilty it would be if I drank again. Have a good one sober friends your all amazing and don’t forget it.
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Congrats that great achievement Joseph 
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Super numbers, congratulations
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Checking in.
Met with new potential housemates about 2 hours ago, nice people good vibes, very motivated and driven. I like that.
They asked what my goals are. I said pay off debts, do my own personal growth, and improve my life to generate the things I want they were like great, we are all doing the same.
Been checking in with @KevinesKay based on his recommendations on the book, kinda nice to have that. Gives me some perspective and opportunity to grow,for that I am grateful
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1.12 am UK time. Today will be day 41 for me.
I’m checking in very early as I’ve just woken from a very intense nightmare. I won’t go into too much detail but it was a nightmare including my father and violence against myself and my mum. It has left me with such a bodily response. I feel cold and panicky.
I’ve been reading the book The Body Keeps Score which is about how trauma is stored and how our bodies react years after. I think this indicates I could perhaps use some help processing my past. It also makes me so sad and mad that alcohol played such a role in the life of my family and that it had the capacity to change my father so much at times.
But for now I’m going to get up. Have a hot honey and lemon. Journal about this for 10mins to get my immediate thoughts onto paper to lessen the immediate anxious feelings, then meditate for 10mins using calm before trying to get to sleep again feeling a bit more relaxed hopefully. I’m sorry that this is a bit of a dark check in and I hope people don’t mind.
But it is a new day. I will not drink today. And this journey is teaching me to face these things and try use coping mechanisms.
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