Checking in daily to maintain focus #31 (Part 2)

Checking in.

Boundaries in the begining of my recovery were so foreign to me. I was confused, I felt like I was running on pure self will as I cemented firm lines in the sand around me. I didn’t understand that boundaries were flexible and that the beauty of recovery and freedom is that we now have choices. I didn’t understand that a boundary I made with someone today might change a little as I grew stronger in my recovery down the road. As time has gone by and I have worked my ass off learning how to live again this whole concept has become more clear. It goes along with impermenance… things are always changing now. Nothing is stuck like it was when I was in that constant state of chaos I couldn’t escape from.

I am so grateful to be free from that. No matter how many times my addict knocks on my door and tries to lure me outside to play today, I have enough “Fuck you’s” stored up for 24 hrs.

:orange_heart::dizzy::orange_heart:

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And that’s exactly what you are doing… a step at a time #teamprour@ja

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Mathematics do count… first time I looked @ TS today… What a nice number.:pray::heavy_heart_exclamation:

I thank my angels, and more then few amongst them are with you guys

Check in.

6 days and my wandering starts again, I will keep ya’ll posted from all over Europe and @LuluJo … Leave a day later… And call me

Someone in Vienna?? Up for coffee (?
Or London Stansted… I have to transit there for 7 hrs

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You damn right rock

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It’s okay no need to be sorry I don’t think I’ve explained how it happened just that I had to have it done and was very scared, no one’s ever. Thank you for caring enough to ask. That’s very kind of you.
It is three titanium disc, with 3 titanium cages, and a 1 large titanium plate, with 12 titanium screws, that you can’t really see all of them. The reason is a closed head injury that happened when I was 5 many years old. It’s a head on collision, my head and a station wagon! That my brother told me it was okay to cross the road in front of a red caution light, while we were trick-or-treating. That left me with Autonomic dysreflexia of the spinal cord.
I probably have to have four more identical to these over the next five years, in my lower back and C6-C7 yet in my cervical spine. My spine is just so bad they can only do so many at a time. It’s taking them since 2006 to decide to do these and to find a good neurosurgeon because there’s so many nerves involved in this being crushed along with my spinal cord. And of course they like to wait to the last minute nobody wanted to mess with it to do it until they have to even though they know it’s happening and can see it happening ! Even knowing the insurance company will pay. But it’s all good. I do have my use back of my left arm so that’s really good. I’m not real sure about the pain though because they still have me on pain pills so that will tell on time. So everything’s looking up. The next súrgery hopefully I will get the feeling back in my left side from the chest down and hope and full control of different orgañs . But like I said it’s okay You can ask questions.

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Understand how you feel. I’ve had to do that with the job as a teacher once. I also had the same worry about something my brother and I did when we were 18 years old. I will say a prayer for you. You will be on my mind, and in my heart too. Until you start your new job, for I know you will get the of your dreams. I have that much faith, praying for you

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:joy::joy::joy::joy:

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Those are really beneficial programs. Well done.

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Welcome to the Cult of Clean. The place where,
when you check in, you are encouraged to never check out.

Even if you get to “million-zillion”, as long as you don’t stop getting up when you fall, with sincere conviction and belief in your ability to arrive, you will eventually make the days you’ve been clean a “zillion”.

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what up everyone checking in on day 67 . God bless everyone out there determined to live a better life.

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Wow, that’s so intense! I can only imagine how terrifying this has been for you! Have you ever heard of Frequency Specific Microcurrent (FSM)?

It’s a medical tool that uses frequencies. Various types of practitioners use it from medical doctors, to chiropractors, to nurses, to massage therapists, etc., etc. The frequencies used by the specialist just depend on what is being treated.

This book was written for the layman so it’s easy to read. You can buy the book, but honestly if you like audiobooks, I would be willing to give you the file if you want it (Honestly, I’ll share it with anyone who wants a copy, just hit me up): https://www.amazon.com/Resonance-Effect-Frequency-Specific-Microcurrent/dp/1623171105

I don’t know how open you are to trying various modalities of pain management, but if you are and if there is a suitable practitioner near you, it might be worth a try. It’s not a panacea, but things like nerve pain can actually pretty easy to treat.

You can try this link to look for practitioners if you’re interested: Practitioner Locator - Frequency Specific Microcurrent the real difficulty can lie in finding one in your area, and then finding one that specializes in what you need.

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Still going strong :muscle::call_me_hand:Trying to weather through this storm :cloud_with_lightning_and_rain:

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I have small and large cell neuropathy so I know about nerve pain. And I’ve done acupuncture, chiropractic, and my daughter is one of the leading medical massage therapist, in the area so over the last 10 yrs I know, I say since 2006 but it’s actually been going on a lot longer than that I’ve tried a lot of things. Because I have been suffering from migraines since I was probably 10 years old. I will most
definitely check the link out later. I really thank you so very much. I really do appreciate it. Sounds very interesting. I’ll copy and paste it to my notepad. I think my daughter did that FSM for something she was going through. I’ll have to ask her about that. I’ve done a lot of alternative medicine because of herfield of work. And also because of my grandmother she’s into or was into that type of stuff She’s passed away. Thank you :rainbow::two_hearts::hugs:

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Checking in clean and sober trying to keep my priorities in line spread the strength and hope. Greatful to be alive today wishing you all well in the coming week.:hugs:

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Thank so much :100::green_heart:

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Hun I just did a week long digital detox, no internet at all. I deleted Facebook many many years ago and I stopped looking at Instagram about 6 months ago. I wont lie, I do enjoy tic tok because there are so many funny animal videos on there :joy: but I do go down a tictok rabbit role often and I realised I do need to have a complete internet detox… So I did it… It was great!

I highly recommend doing it. The only socials I occasionally look at now are Pinterest and here on ts… Oh and YouTube, but YouTube is a non negotiatiable life tool :joy::stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye::tada:

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Lmao :joy: love it :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

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There are different frequency therapies available out there. While they’re all working with frequencies, there are some differences in how the approach is applied–which is neither good nor bad. I think they are all able to do good things.

I know what it’s like to run the gambit with every modality I can get my hands on. I’d actually reached a point where I thought there was nothing else I could try and gave up for a few months before decided that there had to be something else out there that I hadn’t tried. I found a chiropractor that used this, so I gave it a shot. I had some success, but felt like they weren’t treating the right thing. Out of sheer determination, I signed up to take the training as a student (I was studying exercise science, so I had basic underlying knowledge to take the class), then traveled out of state to get trained with a bunch of doctors, nurses, chiropractors, natural paths… there was a dentist there and a vocal coach, a few massage therapists.

I won’t go into the entire story, but I found out that the reason I was still in so much pain after the surgeries, was because I was being poisoned by the hardware in my neck. The end plates of the disk replacement are made of chromium and cobalt, and I was suffering from metalosis. This is most often seen in hip replacement patients, but my situation is not unheard of. Since no surgeon would be willing to pull the hardware out unless I was literally on death’s doorstep, I bought an automatic unit so I could treat myself as needed (and for a while it was every day), but also sprang for the manual one with the idea that I would also get my massage therapy license and use it for that (then COVID happened and I decided to put a hold on that path :laughing: ).

I still have pain (because the cause will never go away), but it’s manageable, and I no longer have the other horrible symptoms that come with having metallosis. I also don’t have to deal with doctor after doctor telling me that I was imagining things, faking it, having problems that I knew I wasn’t, etc. I treat myself for other things (I am my own test subject :laughing: ), I treat friends and family, and most of all I treat my 19 year old cat. And honestly, I will treat literally anyone who crosses my path (often for free and with their understanding that I’m not a doctor and can’t guarantee anything) if they want me to and I think I can help.

You are SO very welcome. The physical pain and suffering of something like what you’re dealing with is so much, but then there’s the emotional impact, and then you have to deal with the “Industrial ‘Medical’ Complex” and the “Legally Approved Drug Cartel of the United States”. :unamused: I really hope you’re able to find someone and that it’s able to help ease your suffering. Your daughter sounds like she’s an amazing person! Seriously, let me know if you’d like the audio book and I will supply you with the file. :slightly_smiling_face:

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Day 85.
7.33am.
8 degrees.

Late yesterday afternoon I got a call from work saying that our building had been shut down because of a covid close contact attending. Everyone has been asked to get tested and await instructions… So I went to get tested last night. Will get result today I think…our states lockdown has been extended anyway , so even if my work building has been shut down indefinitely, we can’t go to work anyway till lockdown in lifted in our state, so sitting ducks we remain :thinking:

I feel good today. No urges , no wandering using thoughts… Today is a good day :heart:

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I try to make a funny here and there, just to be sure people know I have a sense of humor. :wink:

Glad to see you back. You doing okay with that heavy feeling that hit you last week?

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