Day 1066. I got a big day tomorrow and so I hoping my toddler will allow me a full night sleep tonight. 
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Day 378
After setting a boundary I am now double-guessing myself. It was the right thing, but may, probably will, make things awkward.
I am generally feeling more productive now, it was the good ol pms slump. Doing some Japanese study, started getting cracking on some research. Feeling more tolerant of my partner, etc
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Day 1070 
Hello TS people, goodmorning! At least for me it is 
Holiday is slowly coming to an end. Iām at home and have today and tomorrow and then have to work again. Not looking forward to it.
I could get used to have a forever holiday!
Iām doing good on the alcohol recovery path so now decided to try to work on my other addictions as well: sugar and shopping.
I know I have a addictive brain ore personality, how do I explain what I meanā¦I wonder if I have this from birth ore that I became this way by drinking to much?
So here I am:
Sugar and shopping Day 3
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Lol, I just did an āaddictive personaliy testā and got āfew to no signsā! I am sensible when it comes to moving in with someone, etc, which was a question, but still drink to escape low self esteem etc. Maybe I skewed the test because I am sober and more stable now too?
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I just read an interesting article (in Dutch so I cannot share it) about a theory about 2 different kind of personalities who more easily get addictive. It also mentioned the genetic part.
It discribes a anxious personality and an impulsive one. I definitely recognize myself in the anxious one. It also mentioned a bad life event as triggering for developping an addiction. That also fit in. The genetic part as well.
The anxious personality builds up his addiction by needing more and more for the same ātrillā and the impulsive one is faster addictive. They said the anxious personality is mostly above 25 and the impulsive below 25 when addictive. And the impulsive has a more destructive life the anxious one is mostly high functional.
Maybe the artical was to much black and white, but I found it informative and recognized a lot.
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Sober AF
I cannot do this without you all.
@Tim904 @beachmouse @JLove
@Lucky1620 @ChillyToast @Stormy
@Wakikki @MolotovMoxie
@No_more_C2H6O
@DontGiveUpTrying
I donāt know you all as well as some, but I see you, and your shares mean a lot and help me to continue on my journey.
And for those of you that know me a bit more, I certainly could not have gotten where I am today without all your love and support.
Thank you
I came toā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
āDonāt be afraid; just believe."
Mark 5:36
Good night everyone 
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What a great number! Awsome done! Such a inspiration 
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- Coffee. Didnāt do all I set out to do yesterday. I did have a friend over for dinner. And I did arrange for me and my sis to finally go and scatter my mumās ashes in a couple of weeks after waiting to do that for nearly 8 years. Itās finally time. Talk about avoiding stuff and procrastinating. Well. Seriously working on that now. One day at a time. Sober and clean or I couldnāt do it. Lifeās not easier, but itās definitely much more worth living like this. Have as good a day as you all can friends. Clean and sober. Love from Amsterdam.
@Dazercat Huge congrats Eric. On all. Thanks for being here friend.
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Thanks for sharing this - I can relate absolutely to the anxious personality. I have been far from impulsive in my life. I wonder if there is a difference in what substances these personalities use? Alcohol certainly was my way to numb anxiety.
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They didnāt reffered to a special kind of doc Rosa.
I was looking for the article, but I cannot find it anymore 
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Woooooo! You rock, amigo!
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That makes a lot of sense. Certainly, many people who donāt know me well would be shocked I am an alcoholic. So quiet, so sensible, so dowdy. But inside the nerves, the self-hate I wanted to escape, made for a perfect storm.
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1212
I am not someone who believes you need to complete a 12 Step Program or work the steps to stay clean. There are so many other tools I learned in rehab, that even though I secretary a NA meeting, I can still help the addict who is still suffering. I completed my first step my first year clean, but with one Sponsor going out to our disease and the other I dropped because we werenāt a good fit, I was fine staying where I was. I didnāt want a sponsee because I didnāt think I could mentor someone because I hadnāt done my own step work.
That all changed 30 days ago. In a meeting, a young man came up to me after the meeting I secretary, introduced himself and that he was told by others to look me up. Turns out we have a ton in common. Were bot not only Veterans but Combat Veterans serving multiple tours in Iraq, Afghanistan and an unnamed location. We suffer not only from addiction, but from the horrors that come with war. So with him asking me many times if Iād be willing to be his Sponsor well knowing I was unsure because I hadnāt went past my first step I told him I would make a decision after talking to some other men. So last night I went to a menās only group and laid it all out. There group acknowledgment was undid have something to offer. I needed to have more clean time then he does, and be willing to guide and mentor him.
Iām starting my second step.today and help guide him through his first. I.know that by doing the steps, even if it didnāt start out the way I wanted it our Higher Power guided him to me. I will finally be able to fulfill a dream I had when getting clean, and that it to help another Soldier.
NEVER CRAVE ALONE
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Good on you both Chad. Iām very glad for the both of you. This gives me hope. BTW, I think and believe you helped many already, soldiers and not.
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The first steps are the hardest. You know it. Like you say yourself, just for today we shall not drink. One day, one hour, one minute at a time. Good you are here. You are not alone. Together we CAN do this ( 
). Have a good sober day friend.
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Thank you so much 
its a honour to meet you 
Also change the way you are dealing with your recovery, so many times we read this is day one, promise me next time you want a drink you tell us before and not after, it doesnāt matter if we sit on here talking to others for hours if thatās what keeps us sober at the beginning. Donāt ever be afraid to ask for help, Donāt ever be afraid to tell another addict how you feel. I hate to surprise you but your really not that special your not experiencing anything new and that my friend is how I know we can help you. All you gotta do is listen and take action.
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