Brilliant work @Clarity.
In a half hour I’ll have 27 days, some easier than others. I had a fairly good day today.
Still staying at my mother’s. Up and away to 11am aa… don’t think I heard much but I was there.
Went to shop and home to my own family. They are heading away for a few days summer holiday tomorrow so I helped wash clothes for them to pack. Washed my wife’s car and my own. Just keep moving all day. Had to leave early there to let them finish packing because I didn’t want them to see that I’m gutted. Know it has my wife’s head wreaked going without me… but she can’t Cope with the pain of my relapses.
This is where I am because I haven’t done the work to stay sober. I’m kind of just sitting with the pain trying to accept it because it is real. I’m hoping that a few days reflection on this will give me strength to continue on my sober path and help me through the moments when I’m weak.
I’m not going back to the soleless misery of active addiction so if it takes pain to get there… it’s good pain.
God I’m a wingeing fuckwit this evening… No one’s dead and I’m in a better place than a few weeks ago.
Peace and love to anyone struggling. Kevin.
373.57 Days
Welcome to the 365 club
I’m here, I’m alive and I’m sober.
Day 329
Today we celebrated Christmas in July. Our Elf and Easter Bunny helper that does stay with us year around got some extra magic so the boys could get gifts. Instead of Christmas stockings we put out Flip Flops or crocs, and they decorated a palm tree. We spent the day in the pool, as a great final we had a big BBQ.
The boys finally had saved up enough money to buy their own laptops too, we ordered them like a week ago. They arrived today with perfect timing. So now their trying them out waiting for dessert to be ready.
I also invited everyone in my family for a Crawfish boil in two weeks. We buried Pa’s ashes Friday and after the ceremony my Uncle asked if we had any plans on celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary. So I sent our the invitations for the Celebration that’ll be a crawfish boil. I’m planning some party games and all. Hopefully it’s going to be a lot of fun.
We’ve done a lot of gardening the last week, we still have a lot to do,but it feels amazing to be getting forward with the house, with our garden, and with life in general.
I’m so happy and grateful to be where I am today, having the possibility to move forward and keep improving my life.
And I want to Thank all of you for being here, being the amazing support that you are.
Thank you so much 
Wishing everyone a wonderful week.
Today’s quote " everything that happens to you is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose"
I absolute love today’s quote.
@Clarity Sarah amazing milestone! Congrats hun!! 
@M-be-free49 Emma happy birthday!!! 
Keep at it Kevin. It sounds like you got a whole lot to be grateful for when you’re sober. Keep up the good work. Feel it and remember it. That first month is a real nasty bitch.
Being grateful for all that I can have when I’m sober is my strongest tool in my tool box. I practice my gratitude every day. Right here. Check us out if you willing. Daily Gratitude List #2
It’s so worth it.
Ans so are you.
@M-be-free49 - Emm - Happy Birthday! I’m sorry I neglected to say it earlier! I hope your day is awesome!
@Girlinterrupted I think you’re awesome, but can relate lots 
@M-be-free49 I love your plants, and your mug 
Happy Birthday for yesterday 
I hope the reunion goes well 
@RosaCanDo congrats on 70 days I hope your pain is manageable
@Beforemy30s congrats on another sober wedding have fun at the festival
@Lilemm congrats on 30 days
@JustAlys congrats to you and your sister on 47 days sorry for the loss of your Grandma, she would be very proud of you both
@Mno your plant is so beautiful
@JLove congrats on double digits
@Wakikki welcome back 
keep trying
@Clarity congrats on your soberversary 
@Rockstar24777 good luck for your first day 
you’ll be great, looking forward to hearing how it goes
@Jon_Ian congrats on 2 weeks
@Claartje congrats on your month
@MrsOdh merry summer Christmas! 
349 days no alcohol.
317 days no cocaine.
6 days no binge-eating.
I’ve had a rest day today, my body gave me no choice. I slept for 5 solid hours! I usually wake every 60-90mins. I even had to have another nap later in the morning. Spent the day watching TV, I’ve started watching a reality series that has 28 seasons, I remember watching the first few seasons in my early twenties, but I didn’t keep up with it, the oldest season available is season 15, so it’s going to keep me entertaintained for quite some time! 
I even ordered a pizza for lunch, ate half, and ate the other half for dinner. It’s still hard to accept that it’s okay to eat things like that occasionally, but it was needed today, I had no energy to cook, I enjoyed it.
Tomorrow is my assessment for long term therapy. I am so nervous about it, I don’t know what to expect, but I imagine they will want to know about past traumas & current issues, not my favourite things to talk about. I’m really not great at talking to people face to face, especially as there are two of them assessing me, I don’t do well in groups at all. I really wish it was being done online. My dad and his wife are taking me because my anxiety doesn’t let me drive to new places or places that aren’t local, this place is an hour away via motorway, we are ‘making a day of it’ in celebration of the birthday I had at the beginning of the month, because I haven’t been able to see them as they all caught Covid. They are all doing well now, and I am very relieved.
I am hoping to have the motivation and energy first thing in the morning to go to the gym and swimming before my dad picks me up at 11am, if not, I may go in the evening to shake off the stress of the day. Failing that, I will start again on Tuesday, I need to get back on track asap.
I’m so happy to be back such inspiration that I get from ppl like you and others thanks for helping me through the toughest times of my life, I’m literally fighting for my life my addiction is that serious. But I’m done with fighting, il admit defeat and hang my gloves up happily and walk away with my humility, SAYING YOUR SONE FIGHTING I ALWAYS THOUGHT WAS A WEAKNESS BC OF THE WAY OF WAS RAISED, I NOW UNDERSTAND ITS THE STRONGEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR YOUR SELF, NIGHT NIGHT TS. X
308 days no drink drugs or smoking. its a huge drop back down to reality when your little pink cloud finally bursts but TBH although sobriety ain’t too much fun at the minute it’s definitely the time when the magic is happening. Never needed a reason to drink and drug and never had a reason to stop but today I could justify picking up 100 times over but do I, No, Why not???.. The miracle is happening on a daily basis, I don’t know how I do it but who cares how. All I know is nothing ever got better from drinking and when the smoke cleared and the headache was gone guess who used to sit there waiting for me to deal with… Life… You might not always get the reality you want and just when you think you know it all God will teach you another lesson but there is and will never be a justifiable resentment to pick up. We don’t control life but drink and drugs control ours if we give it the opportunity and trust me it only needs one opportunity.
Thank you to ever that tried to make me feel better, I really appreciate it 
I definitely didn’t want to make anyone feel guilty or anything. To be honest, the one’s that hurt my feelings the most don’t even post in this thread. I know I’m just being a little bitch about it, and I’ll het over it. In the past I’ve just taken a hiatus from the forum. It’s honestly so silly, but it’s where I am right now. I’m just grateful to be sober, and I’m sure the funk will lift. Thanks everyone for being there.
I get like that at times, I muted the sober selfies thread bc someone upset me and then spent days wondering why no one was posting on there. I thought it had been banned bc of too much nipple controversy 
CONGRATULATIONS @Clarity
365 long days when viewed from day 1, and short days looking back.
Champion effort
Love this share, Paul. I’ve been thinking of you and your family. Really appreciate you.
