Quick nervous check in…
About to take a bus and look up an old (girl) friend of mine. Her mother was an addict also in my time and she’s her daughter and we go way back but haven’t seen her for at least half a decade and then some… I’m expected to make make dinner and I am quite a bit nervous… It has been a while since I have been out of my comfort zone, and it’s not like a date or something but I do know that she is a special person. always sober, but with all the history… We kept in touch though and now I get to see her again. I don’t even know why I am a bit nervous… Couse I know it’s all good but it feels like another step towards independency away from the depandancy of old live I guess…
I’ll check out later and wish the whole TS clan a formidable and blessed day !
Goodmorning all I find myself today in Augusta GA lastnight truck broke down turbo blew out boss stressing me out no AC omg what a day anyways at the end of it all my boss says hey buy yourself a 12 pack hit the hotel enjoy yourself I said no sir I don’t drink I rather stay sober proud of that as I was walking towards my hotel here in Georgia stressed tired looking defeated but I stayed strong lastnight I’m proud of that ! Sober gang let’s goo !!!
Only I just feel sometimes I’m not like “just people” myself makes me nervous but I damn well know to be proud at what I am today…
Thnx hun, you de_nerved me pretty much
Quite emotional today I went past my old home and the gates opened of how much I miss my step dad… I know I’ll get through it clean… Its learning that its okay to cry…
Jeez my old hometown (doesn’t feel like home) is full of homeless and people on drugs as i was driving past there was a guy in the road asleep while two cars had blocked the lane so this guy didn’t get ran over… On the way back there was an ambulance and two police vans… Addiction is a fucking killer!!!
Well…a woman’s gestation period is actually 40 weeks which is 10 months. We just say 9 months because that is when a baby is considered “full term” your daughter is more than likely past 9 months pregnant.
Checking in AF. Birthday party just over and its all clean and nice here again. Few hours we are going out for dinner, and Im a bit stressed for this, thinking about the drinking. I dont want, and know if I do one glass, Im all over it again. Yet my head and mind say ohh its just for the dinner and cozy, familytime at the restaurant having a good time. My mind its stupid. Telling my self stay strong, stay strong.
Thanks menno. That’s where I struggle, I don’t know what my problems are. Why I get depressed, or why I have anxiety, or trouble getting motivated. My councilors that I had for that year just always said nothing is wrong with you. Your normal, and then when I got my doctor who prescribed me my medicine she said I had severe ADHD. I literally have everything to be grateful and happy for and I geuss alot of times I just set all these expectations on where I should be in life rather then just actually taking it a day at a time. I definitely do plan on on doing my steps again as I have knew amends to make and I do hear ppl in the rooms work the steps over and over
For me therapy was always me time. It was each time fucking exhausting and each time I realised something new. Although I knew it long before, heard it so often before there is a time when it sinks from the brain to the heart. So, for me none of the three therapies I did was useless.
Yeah for sure I do struggle to remain teachable some days and definitely fall into Mike’s way. I geuss the reason I feel rehab isn’t going to help anymore is because I didn’t think I would of even relapsed after that year and having the humbling experience I did in that year. What got me was being cocky, I know how to work my recovery and what I need to do to stay sober, so I geuss I think going to rehab isn’t going to stop life from happening and when I get out I’ll still have to fight through all the same stuff and if one day I decide not work my recovery then boom another relapse… Idk I still haven’t drank, yes I stayed accountable and reset for the line I did, I am proud that I did dump the rest rather then going for a full blown fuck up. But it was a fuck up none the less. I’m still attending my meetings even when I relapsed the other day, so alot of it boils down to manning up and working it harder, one day it will stick for me in proud I don’t give up.
thnx 
omg what a day anyways at the end of it all my boss says hey buy yourself a 12 pack hit the hotel enjoy yourself I said no sir I don’t drink I rather stay sober proud of that as I was walking towards my hotel here in Georgia stressed tired looking defeated but I stayed strong lastnight I’m proud of that ! Sober gang let’s goo !!!
