Our Covid numbers are spiking here, too. We’ve never really been locked down. Now we are about to get into the super cold, where all the people are indoors for most of the time. Precautions here, except by choice, are basically none. I really feel for frontline healthcare. They have to be so OVER IT.
Day 11 here. I love the number 11. Yesterday was a great, chill day. My mother wasn’t feeling well, so she stayed home. So, no pie. We went to a movie in the morning. The kids and I cooked and ate and played a game called “Therapy,” which was hysterical. It’s from the 80’s, so some of the terminology is It was educational and entertaining and I wish there was a more current version. I wish I had taken a picture of my cornbread pudding. For the love! It was amazing! My college kid decided to spend a second night, so she’s sleeping downstairs, kiddo number two is at work dealing with Black Friday insanity.
I hope those who celebrate had a great day. This will be our last “celebrated” Thanksgiving. We’ve made a plan to be in the theater for most of the day, watching movies and eating pizza (gluten-free for me, vegetarian for them) from now on.
Thanksgiving was 116 days without alcohol for me. First sober Thanksgiving!!! It went well. I had an N/A option called Toast, a sparkling beverage made with white tea, ginger, and white cranberry that was so good and festive. I feel like I was able to enjoy the holiday even more without alcohol in the way. I could eat more food (haha) and was less tired.
How did things go for everyone? I know holidays can be tough…
Checking in at one year, nine months and four days I haven’t been coming on here daily like I was because I have been endlessly scrolling on stupid Facebook which I really want to work on that. I didn’t have it because I deactivated it and once I downloaded it again the addict in me just went to town. I had an awesome Thanksgiving. Usually in the past I would need heroin to get through it, stay upstairs in my room when my family came over, or I would be in treatment and miss it. So this year I got to be with my family and I didn’t have anxiety around them like I thought I would. My addiction really affected some of the relationships and I need to make amends and have grown really far apart from some family members i grew up really close to but I was able to get through the holiday sober with social grace. I had a good time and stayed around them even though there was some points where everyone had someone to talk to, besides me… so I just sat and thought about my Higher Power and how
I can ALWAYS rely on Him even when I can’t rely on my family because they aren’t perfect. Hope you all had a sober, great holiday and that today is amazing as well. I am at my parents house until Sunday then I head back to my place.
Beautiful post and might i add… u are just glowing in ur pic! You look so happy. Amends made to your loved ones are already happening for u… by u being present and clean and sober. It’s showing them that your making change and that your serious about recovery. I’m proud of you! I’m glad you had a wonderful holiday
Checking in Day 5
Not much to say this morning. Woke up sore from the gym so I decide to sleep in until 7am. Emotionally in a funk sort of. Just having some coffee and relaxing. Have a great addiction free day everyone.
Checking in day 13. Been for a run which was nice. Just feeling like I have so much time at the moment and not sure what to do with it as I’m also trying to keep a low profile and steer away from some social stuff to begin with as I don’t want to risk drinking. I live alone, wish I had a dog or something to play with! Maybe I’ll try and adopt one hope everyone is having a good day
Day 1,485. Heading to my home group to get my 4 year coin and because this tends to be a very busy meeting for newcomers and people coming back so it’s always good to be there.
Day 6 here!
Slept better last night. Wasnt a great sleep but it was better.
After work last night was a little bit rough. Walking home I have no choice but to pass by the pub I always went to. Last night while walking by I could see a group of my close friends inside. The temptation was real. I think if I went in I could have just grabbed a pepsi or something, but I dont know… so I just kept on walking.
Got home, had a snack, got my laundry done and stream a horror based video game on twitch, which managed to scare the crap out of me a few times haha.
Despite those few moments of struggle, it was a decent night.
Checking in on day 8. People here have seen my ups and downs… I’m an imperfect rollercoaster, I know that. But I’m not here for that. I’m here for me. To make it my purpose to turn my nobody life into a somebody I bloody love in the end. Something I noted down earlier: I always expect to magically receive so much more than I’m prepared to give back to this world… I need to invest at least as much or more as I wish to receive, because that’s what the great balance of life is all about. How honest and fair am I really being, expecting more from life than my careless self deserves? It’s a give and take. The greater the input, the greater the output. Life and some of the great joys which can come with it are not for granted…! So, here I am anyways, with lot’s on my mind, and the pressure of success or failure on my shoulders wherever I go… What to do? Family expectations… Friend expectations… Even stranger expectations… And then there’s my own, jesus…! I’m sorry I can’t always be there for people when I’m not even there for myself to be honest. Maybe that’s what it all comes down to? But we know BETTER now! Such is life… Whatever the case, never a point complaining about that which isn’t. I’m grateful to be alive, and have 100% faith in myself! So moral of the story is…? There isn’t one. How strong are we people? And how far are we willing to go in the end…? I do care, and am trying. Fuck eternal failure. There’s zero expectation to be free, only your will to be…! Hope you’re keeping your head up, feeling good and healthy whoever and wherever you are in life right now sister or brother, we CAN!
It was educational and entertaining and I wish there was a more current version. I wish I had taken a picture of my cornbread pudding. For the love! It was amazing! My college kid decided to spend a second night, so she’s sleeping downstairs, kiddo number two is at work dealing with Black Friday insanity.
and might i add… u are just glowing in ur pic! You look so happy. Amends made to your loved ones are already happening for u… by u being present and clean and sober. It’s showing them that your making change and that your serious about recovery. I’m proud of you! I’m glad you had a wonderful holiday
Maybe I’ll try and adopt one 
u know I might just do that! 
congratulations!!!
Such is life… Whatever the case, never a point complaining about that which isn’t. I’m grateful to be alive, and have 100% faith in myself! 
So moral of the story is…? There isn’t one. 
How strong are we people? And how far are we willing to go in the end…? I do care, and am trying. Fuck eternal failure. There’s zero expectation to be free, only your will to be…! Hope you’re keeping your head up, feeling good and healthy whoever and wherever you are in life right now sister or brother, we CAN! 
