Checking in daily to maintain focus #35

Congratulations on your 90 days TM.
And your victory over that Christmas trigger.
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:pray:t2::heart:

Speaking of 90 days @ShesGotMoxie :thinking:

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Way to go! itā€™s definitely a challenge to have a husband still drinking in the home but you are doing it well. KUDOS!

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Thank you so much! U must be sooo excited about your visit with ur son! Hope all goes well :slight_smile:

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Welcome Carol :hugs:

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:boom: :clap: :partying_face: Wahoo! :partying_face: :clap: :boom:

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Looking at this as I type. The air is chill and crisp, and I can hear a few birds chirping in a way that reminds me of spring. A strong urge for a cup of coffee and an accompanying shot of liquor hit me hard, then slowly tapered off into nothing.

Itā€™s amazing how tactile emotional memories can be.

I donā€™t particularly want alcohol (though I do want the coffee Iā€™ve also given up :laughing: ), but there is just that warm and fuzzy feeling from the past that has faded into something sadly nostalgic for another life that had its good times, but within which I was horribly miserable.


@TeamMeyer congrations on your 90 days!
@Olivia Vent away. Insomnia is the worst. Iā€™ve been there and I feel like there may be nothing worse than not being able to sleep because it makes trying to handle everything else in life more difficult.
@MagicILY big congrats on 100! You have been doing so awesome!
@Mno The orange color on that tree is really amazing!
@crystalclear Welcome back. I like that ā€“ ā€œchoosing your hardā€. A good reminder that sobriety wonā€™t necessarily make your life unicorns and rainbows, but that you will be taking control of your difficulties instead of letting them take control of you.
@Butterflymoonwoman Great job! That really is a big deal and Iā€™m so glad your husband gave you that recognition. Youā€™ve been working so hard and making the choice not to spend that money on drugs really is a major thing! Iā€™m so happy for you!
@Fury Wow. Good for you for reaching out and Iā€™m so glad she recipricated! Itā€™s hard being the oldest in a dysfuctional and abusive family. I donā€™t know your life, but I can relate to that. Iā€™m really happy for you.
@Its_me_Stella Oh noā€¦ Iā€™m so sorry about your homegroup member. My heart goes out to you and the members of your group.
@Winchester Welcome back.
@CATMANCAM Iā€™m always impressed that anyone can keep up with the meme thread. :laughing: Though maybe itā€™s just me. I kind of feel like I check it in the morning and then in the evening there are a 1000 new memes. Thatā€™s hyperbolic, I know, but still feels like it! Hang in there. Food related addictions are always hard, I feel. Itā€™s not like you can just quit eating and avoid food. Hope all goes well with the job thing.

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Day 37 My husband thinks Iā€™m spending too much time ā€œgetting soberā€ and that Iā€™m being ā€œtoo influenced by people here in this community into thinking Iā€™m a drunkā€. ~ sigh ~ Part of me wanted to believe him. Wouldnā€™t it be keen if I didnā€™t have a problem? But that would just be the drunk in my head, listening to the drunk in his head, that want us both to drink. Standing firm and standing sober.

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That picture is so beautiful. So calming and kinda eerie at the same time lol I love it! Iā€™m a huge fan of nature. Thank u for the support and the acknowledgment. I feel good about what I did :smiley: I hope I can keep this up cuz my thoughts and urges come and go and itā€™s crazy how our minds work.

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Oh jeeze :frowning: thatā€™s hard to hear. Ur doing something positive for yourself and your life and it sucks when those close to us donā€™t see this as something that is actually saving our lives. Does he struggle with addiction or alcoholism? I found that people who donā€™t struggle with this, find it hard to understand that we need to make recovery 1st and foremost in our lives so that we CAN be a productive member of society/family etc. Iā€™m glad to hear that you sticking to your program and not falling away from it. Hope ur day looks up!

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Congrats on your 13 days sober you won last night.

I just wanted you to know how much I appreciate teachers. I value how hard you work to help our children succeed. I am so happy you have found a position that fits with your values. So many of us just go through life working a job because itā€™s what we got our post secondary education for or itā€™s what our parents dreamt we would do. We end up living lives that werenā€™t meant to be ours and therefor we become unhappy and self medicate. What a change though waking up to a job that gives your soul a deep sense of purpose. I am very happy for you.

:orange_heart::seedling::blush:

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TY for the support. He has an alcohol addiction too but is in deep denial about it. We were best drinking buddies and heā€™s missing that. I feel bad for breaking up the party but I canā€™t be that person he wants me to be anymore. Weā€™ve been together 40 years and itā€™s hard to have our paths diverge so catastrophically but I KNOW Iā€™m on the right path.

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Yes we are :muscle:

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Yes you are! And your doing an amazing job on your journey to becoming the best version of YOU! Really proud of you. I can imagine how hard this must be for you in this situation :frowning: but ultimately at the end of the night, we each have to lay our heads down on our pillows and live with our decisions. No one else will do that for us. And right now it sounds like you are doing what you need to do for you hugs

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These 90 days have flown by! I sometimes say that Iā€™m proud of myself, but I was thinking deeply about that this morning, and honestly Iā€™m not really feeling thatā€¦ at least, not yet. I do know that this is a big accomplishment after 20 years of drinking, but I also know I have so much more to work on. Getting the alcohol out of the way is only the beginning. Thank yā€™all for being here as I work on the REAL me. :purple_heart:

@Dazercat Thanks bunches, Eric. :blush:

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Yay!!! Omg! So excited for you! Congratulations :rose:

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There she is! So happy for ya Carolyn!
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Iā€™ll go ahead and feel proud of you enough for the both of us if thatā€™s makes any sense. You been such an asset to TS. And I just know you will get to where you want to be. Getting the drink out of the way for 90 days is huge. And you worked your ass off for it.
ODAAT
:pray::heart:

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Awesome achievement! Congratulations with your 3 months! :nine::zero::star_struck::muscle::partying_face::pray:

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Is that Chesney? Great screen pic. :heart:

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Day 3
Checking inā€¦
Felt really REALLY, proud of myself this morning. Was sitting on my couch thinking about how I wouldā€™ve felt if I had used last night with that money instead of spending it on things I needed. We all know those feelings too well, the guilt and shame, experiencing the physical effects of it all etc. Was really grateful for waking up clear headed and emotionally okay. Yes, I got through that and ya im proud. But im realizing there is ALOT more work to do and today is going to be more work. I literally forgot that today was my payday lol. I only work as relief staff on weekends so my cheque was not that big. I did pay bills and then I have $96 left. My mind starts goin. Here we go again lol I didnā€™t think I wouldā€™ve had money left over so I didnā€™t really plan for what to spend with this extra money. So im trying to plan on how to spend this the right wayā€¦ while my mind is trying to convince me that. ā€œOh, u did so well yesterdayā€¦ maybe we can have just one)ā€. I donā€™t remember who commented this on one of my posts, but if you read this and recognize it, I want to thank u!!! Cuz Iā€™m getting myself one of theseā€¦ a timed safe where I stick my money in there and it wonā€™t come out until the timer releases it:


Anyway, Iā€™m thinking of maybe a Christmas tree for the home and a pack of smokes for hubby lol idk gotta think of something soon before my mind gets the best of me

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Yes, it is! Doing what she loves and tearing through the snow! :dog::heart: Thanks Eric, for being you. :blush:

@Butterflymoonwoman Thanks so much, Dana!!! Speaking of being proud, Iā€™m really proud of you! Iā€™m happy youā€™re here. :blush::purple_heart:

@ShadowFax Thanks bunches, Roland! :relaxed::purple_heart:

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