Bad ass butterfly you are doing great and the racing thoughts and yoyo emotions are just you healing.
I know money is not good for you so if you need to hit the microphone and talk it out all day on here to get through do that. I’m not busy 
.
I’m proud of you
ODAAT
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Wow thats some amazing self awareness 
Sugar is a hard one. But you seem to be handling it ODAAT 
proud for you!
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This. Right here. One example I can come up with for me is stealing. That broke my soul because I was going against my morals and values but there have been times where I have been sober and I have stolen things and I relapsed not too long after. For whatever reason those behaviors are tied into my drug use and I know this time being sober I CANNOT bring them into my recovery because I have to work a program of rigorous honesty.
“Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves.”
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D 510 sober. Tomorrow the tests to check my thyroid. Then sleep.
Today, anxiety. Then relief for talking to my boss about how I have been feeling. And then more anxiety bc still couldnt follow through. Anxiety. Then, an overwhelming feeling of sadness.
Appetite still not back. Heck, I was asked today if we should order pizza and I said no. I have never turned down pizza…
I think might actually be depressed and I didnt even notice. I was telling myself all the time that because everything in my life is good, that Im good too.
Told my date about this and he is so freaking supportive. Still weirded out by the fact that he wants to spend time with me, is nice to me, says he misses me. I mean i get why i like him - he is nice, caring, funny, interesting… But why does he like me 
i still dont think i deserve any good people in my life so this is good training for me, trying not to run away and hide.
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Isn’t it amazing how dishonesty and activities that go against our moral compass is tied into relapse? I fine that too. It’s almost like a snowball effect. I start lieing and being dishonest or intentionally hurting people and before u know it I’m using. I hate to admit this but the post office drops off packages for people in my building behind the Concierge desk. And since being clean my brain makes up crazy shit like, take a package that isn’t urs and see what it is!.. keep it or maybe sell it… and thankfully I never have bcuz I tell myself… that’s dishonest and I wouldn’t want someone taking my packages. But the insanity of our disease is unreal! And it’s a slippery slope if we choose to act out in old ways… imo it’s only a matter of time before relapse occurs.
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Thank you so much for your support! I really appreciate that I don’t know how I will feel tmrw but we will see. Going to start my day off right and check in often for sure anyway
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We are sober and I love it!
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that’s a very random picture not sure why I found it so funny but I did 
congrats on your sober days BTW 
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Thank you Flannery 
She is still in the hospital but she is a fighter. Thank you for your prayers 
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Your incredibly strong even if you don’t feel like it at the moment. My thoughts are with you 
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I missed you hitting 365 days I’ve adored your recovery and checking from the beginning…
Just wanted to say well done x
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Checking in 92 days no alcohol and while waiting for the train I got to tell 3 people “I don’t smoke” 
I officially accepted the house manager job today and was able to go to my friends graduation. I also of course went to the gym and finished putting up Christmas lights at church.
I got everything done today that I was wanting to do and there is nobody I need to apologize to for anything that I did today. I’m kinda liking this clear head the one problem I really want to change is my sleep schedule. I am up at 5 and asleep around 10:30. I feel like a grown up… forget that lol
I love you guys and want the best for you all
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I know it feels very hard right now but it will get better. You’re doing great.
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Just saw this and I don’t know you but you should not play around with chest pains. Please get checked out.
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Never checked in today. Day 35, tired and slept most of the day. Typical, few good days, few bad days that’s life ain’t really shit we can do about it, just wait for the better days again ans quit expecting everyday to be good because that’s just not how life works. Take care see y’all tomorrow
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I love productive and fulfilling days. Isn’t it satisfying?! Glad you had an awesome sober day!
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Hey all! Thanks for the thoughts and prayers. I seem to be okay now. Tried to take a nap, which didn’t happen in spite of my tiredness, but at least the pain went away!
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60 day check in 
Had a busy, productive day and focused on my mental and physical health, which includes setting boundaries with people in my life who leech my joy. Took a run, walked the dogs and pulled weeds. Weeding is great for anxiety 
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Evening check in
Coming up on Day 6
Wow… I haven’t seen 6 days in a VERY long time. It’s remarkable… honestly. I get very excited to see the number go up everyday the higher it goes, the more I don’t want to restart… so it’s good motivation too. Hubby got home and I got that feeling that he wanted to maybe make a call. I could just sense it in his body language. Normally I would take this opportunity to say something like, “ya that would be nice” etc. Instead I didn’t say a thing… neither did he. He was abit irritable after work too for whatever reason and it was amazing how I responded to him. I’m much more calm and patient when I’m not itching to use. Im much more sensitive to others needs when I’m not thinking of myself and my selfish needs. We ate supper and will relax until we get ready for bed. Good day so far overall. Really so very grateful for my recovery and for TS 
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