Good for you, Dana. I’m glad you pulled through. I’ve been away for a day, so I wanted to congratulate you on your 7 days. If I’m not mistaken you’re getting close to day 8. Good job.
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Yesterday, I started craving to act out. My mine’s toxicity level went up to 7. I was a mess. My TL level has not been that high for over 2 months. But this morning, my toxicity level went to 8. By this time I was demonstrating horrible custody of my eyes and mind. I was watching videos on my phone without much concern for my boundaries. And today I was thinking about acting out throughout most of the day. It’s strange. It’s like the addict inside me knew exactly what behaviors would step over the line into level 9. So I didn’t view any porn. I didn’t masturbate. I didn’t go near any places of acting out. I didn’t put any nasty search terms in my browser. I wanted to go to level 10. But the addict in me just couldn’t convince me to get past level 8. I tried playing the tape. Logically explaining to myself that porn has no value. Why crave something that has no value? That I was getting no benefit from this. And that wasn’t working.
But later on, I played the tape again. And this time, I played it even longer. And recognized that after the acting out followed by the guilt followed by the cravings and the moodiness and the obsession and the void. The end of the tape let me back to here. Because without a doubt, I know that because I don’t give up, ever, I will always come home. I’ve been here before. So why act out to begin with? From there, I started to come to my senses.
What I don’t like about what happened these past 24 hours…
That I let my mind take me so far away from clarity. I’m not proud of that. And I’m not proud of some of the behaviors that I’m guilty of such as lusting after women in my view or on the screen.
What I do like about what’s happened…
My boundaries. The toxicity level diagram that I’ve set for myself has been extremely helpful. Many times, over the years, I let myself go to level 9 thinking that it’s okay because it’s not a relapse. And then relapse happens shortly afterwards.
I like the fact that this is the first time I’ve craved in over 2 months! Wow! This is a first for me.
So my toxicity level is back to level 4. My mind and self has not been perfect, but according to my boundaries, I can still consider myself sober from porn 72 days. And I’m gonna take it. Thank you, Lord.
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Hey Kevin! Yes I hit my 1 week last night at 11pm. So my 8 days is in 2 hours and 15 min lol 
and I want to say wow!!! Wow and right on Kevin for ur post!!! I am so proud of you too! U worked thru that amazingly and u came back here and u didn’t let that addictive thinking take u to a toxic level of 10! Thats impressive! Be so proud of what u accomplished today. We both got thru something today way to go my friend!
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So… when I was reading your message I kinda teared up. I said oh no…I felt it cause we got the same war. The same struggle. We all stumble many times. Stumble forward. But remember: DO NOT LET SHAME OR GUILT DOMINATE YOU TONIGHT. that’s a strong dopamine response your body will push to make you feel better… which simulates you know what. Tomorrow will be day 73. Keep your head up… it happens. Get up and move on. We are getting to 365.
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You won that one, fuck yeah you did!!!
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Kevin congrats on your 72 days!!!
I know how much strength it takes to pull yourself out of the rabbit hole once you are that far down. You did a great job today.
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Welcome back seb 
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Haha thanks girl!!! Love the video 
thanks for u support 
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Today has been a meh day of epic fails. The universe just is not on My side today 
BUT then something lovely happened…
I’d forgotten that I had a make up order due to be delivered. I buy so much online that I literally forget what I’ve bought until it’s delivered. It’s a problem. But that’s a story for another day
So this package arrives, and inside it is a note that says " everything is always working out for you"
I wrote that to myself when I placed the order, and completely forgot about it 
And then I opened it up at the exact moment I need to hear it.
Magic 
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Sweet. Enjoy your new treats.
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Omg the world gives u a sign exactly when u need it! Love this sooo much!!
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Thank you 
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Good morning all, its 5:50am here in London UK.
I am grateful for the strength iv been given go get to 100 days today. Yayyy .
I’m also gratefull for all of you here and stand with you today and every day sober together 
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100 days!!! So happy for you! 
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Thank you so much 
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This is good to read. 
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Woooohooo
Triple digits congrats!
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Congratulations Twizzle. How exciting 100 Days!! Great work!!
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Driving Theory test! Yay! Sending you best wishes on the test! Let us know how it’s going!
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Checking in on day 1159 and 5 days no diet coke. 
Today is a holiday, it is snowing a bit but it is too warm to stay.
I wish everyone good and sober 24hrs!
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