Thanks Sarah!
Day 121. I believe today is 4 months, so thatâs cool if so. Itâs feels nice, Iâm in good spirit and grateful much love
Itâs all about the taste! Thatâs what I go with when I bake anyway
Congratulations Mike heck yeah!!!
Wòooooooooohooooooooooo.
Woooooohooooo
Welcome to the 500 club Olivia!!!
You go Olivia !! 500 congratulations !!!
Closing in on Day 5.
Thank you, All, for the non-judgmental, compassionate, genuine response to my Day 1 post. I may not check in everyday, but please know that I throw you light and love from the places that feed me and my recovery! (Iâm sure this is not a shocker: from ski trails and books and coffee mugs and deep into my own writing.)
Letâs all go hit the sober trails and glide through another day, yeah?
Big love
Love ya right back, big bro. Canât tell you how much I draw on you and your strength, everyday.
Congratulations on your string of 500 Livy!
You. Are. Incredible.
And
@ShesGotMoxie Whoo hoo! Congratulations!
@Matt Openness can be scary, but afterwards it feels great. I was secretive about aa meetings and this app with my family for a long while. I didnât want to admit it was so bad I needed so much help, I guess. Congratulations on knowing your boundaries and your clean time.
I love BrenĂŠ Brown. Sheâs got great wisdom in her work and her words.
And thanks @Misokatsu! Itâs nice to open up some.
Checking in 28 days sober ! Trying hard to get out of my head today !
That makes my heart happy thank you!
Checking in day 145,
One of those days where I feel like I have to really go out of my way to stay busy to keep from being in my head or negative feelings. Did lunch with my kid and my mom, tonight Iâm going to be showing my nephew how to cook properly for himself(heâs 22) and train him at the gym since heâs never been to the gym and he wants to get into shape. His gym is half an hour away which might sound far, but to me it sounds like an hour remaining occupied, singing siouxsie and the banshees on the freeway .
Shower and yoga when I get home, eat, maybe play something on my PC.
And this is how I will be spending my valentines Saturday.
I took time to think about last yearâs valentines and had to stop myself. The amount of abuse I was enduring under my partner was unacceptable. She destroyed such a magical and expensive weekend. Instead of making memories that wouldâve lasted a lifetime, I spent it cowering in fear when sheâd wake and hoping she didnt have a seizure when she would rest. I wasnt able to be at ease until I finally gave in and drank 2 days in, only then were we both okay and not fighting. Such a God damn shame.
Day 297 clean from self harm.
The friend I made yesterday introduced me to her friend group and we talked for hours. It was tons of fun and they seem like really good people. Hoping to hang out with them regularly.
I havenât slept a full night in weeks. Never sleep more than 4 hours. Have a hard time falling asleep and when I do fall asleep Iâm awake at least every hour or so. And then I usually end up waking up very early in the morning and canât get back to sleep. I canât even begin to explain how exhausted I am. Iâm really not a fan of sleeping pills. I was forced to take them when i was 13 or so and I was a complete zombie. But I donât know how much longer I can take this sleep deprivation either.
Other than the exhaustion Iâm ok.
Checking in!
Today was a hard day. Still sober and no desire to drink but I was reminded today just how much Iâve disappointed my family. The consequences of my addiction are hard on me but my family feels guilt and powerless to have helped me avoid what I must confront now.
I have to remind them that this is a disease. I just donât want anyone to think it was avoidable had they done something different or fixable by anyone but myself.
Anyway, I appreciate this outlet for allowing me to vent and providing me with a community of people who understand my situation - thank you