Checking in - officially about an hour away from a full 7 days sober. My families not impressed (I usually average 10 days then get bored and drink again) but I’m impressed. This time feels different!
Cried A LOT tonight. I can’t cry fast enough to release my emotions so it turns into an angry cry. May have slammed a few doors but I didn’t drink!
Any recommendations on good, affordable punching bags lol
@Dolse71 congrats on your 16 months, Paul. 
@Newlife5 Great job on 60 days, Cindy.
@mno Those flowers are so beautiful!
@Thirdmonkey Wow Scott, 1400 days!
@Girlinterrupted You know… I decided to dump sugar out of my life for a little while. Today was day one. Thank you for posting dougnuts. I can at least look. 
@bloop Welcome.
@C_8 I approve of that number 
@HannahSara7 You know, the great thing is that you don’t need to impress your family, just you. 
Each day that you succeed, you can feel impressed again and again. Life is too short to wait for others to be impressed by you. Just like life is too short to wait for someone else to buy you flowers. 
Try push ups instead of punching bag. It’s free and you are still applying force. Good luck with everything.
I can really relate to this and I remember the feeling well. I experienced different sorts of sadness during the course of my addiction and as I was trying to recover although both times the cycle of sadness seemed pretty much the same.
I can remember the first time in 2005 when I cleaned up of meth and I felt sadness. Some of it was stemming from a feeling of failure. I had not lived up to what everyone thought I was for all those years. I had been living a lie and I gotten in way over my head. I was ashamed, full of regret. I was pregnant and full of fear for the future. I missed my DOC. Once I detoxed, more so then craving the high I craved the intimacy we had. The all nighters we pulled, the 5 hour drives we would take…that also made me very sad.
I can remember in 2019 when I decided I was ready to try to clean up again… to really try. I was also full of sadness, I had piled on many more regrets in my 12 year relapse and had drowned in the shame of them. I had “failed” and being a person who leaves no room for mistakes this was a huge problem. I remember coming on here and asking if “mourning the relationship with your DOC” was a thing in my early days without booze. I had so many people replying to me telling me I wasn’t insane, but I still felt like I had broken up with my favorite boyfriend. I missed the intimacy, the way it made all my pain go away, the way it never left my side. I was sad that I wasn’t a normie. That I wasn’t “just a meth addict” like I thought I was. I was sad that I was a raging alcoholic, garbage can addict who doesn’t give a shit what’s in a pipe or in a rail in front of her. That is my reality and yes it made me sad.
I managed to overcome it though with a lot of acceptance and self compassion. I can now see the beauty in being an addict. If I had not lived the absolutely insane life I have lived I would not be able to walk beside some of the coolest people today in recovery. I would have nothing to offer them. I would have nothing to offer you. If we end up surviving our wars we are left with the biggest gift. We are left with our stories to share with other people which hopefully help hold them up and inspire them when they need some fire.
I am sorry you are feeling sad right now feelings definitely pass, and this is a beautiful thing. The openess will come… keep coming back!!! I am glad you came out to say hi.
Checking in
Day23
Definitly feels weird being home alone as hubby is out with the guys. We are both severe home bodies. I am definitly happy he’s gone out. He needs this. I am trying to make my night nice as well on my own. It’s been very quiet, I have overeaten (and don’t feel good actually), and shortly I will have a relaxing bath with this new face mask I got recently.
Okay… so I’m trying not to let my brain get to me lol Hubby being out is reminding me of past events with previous exs. And I shouldn’t really even compare the 2. Most of my exs were alcoholics and they would go out often and drink and sometimes not come home etc. I loved the fact that my hubby has never even tried alcohol, and I’m not concerned that he will now. But it is still stirring up emotion. I have really tried to make this time for myself a relaxing one. I don’t get this opportunity very often to just have me time. So ya… day 24 is coming up in under 2 hours
Omg I get you.
I stopped drinking and my addict took my eating disorder and ran with it. I suffered terribly last year but with a lot of support and therapy I am feeling more positive this year.
It was a slap in my face “freedom from addiction” ,bullshit,… there’s no freedom for me. But instead of wallowing in the shit of it acceptance has helped. As soon as I tried o “fix” my eating it got so bad. Acceptance and just letting go has helped.
I am here to chat anytime.
Early check in on Saturday morning in bed reading. Day 1175 AF and three whole weeks no diet coke.
Caught a cold somewhere but I am lucky, my glycaemia is good 
so I will just take it easy today.
Have a good and sober weekend!
Day 123 checking in meeting a friend for a gym session then hitting a meeting in the afternoon wasent a great day yesterday someone scratched my car when my wife was doing the shopping I’m going to pray for them this morning nothing is worth drinking have a great day 
Grateful to have made it to 30 days again 
Hope you’re all safe , have a great day everyone
Congratulations!
I heard Blonde Redhead are the support band this tour, did you happen to catch them?
Oh and congrats on staying strong!
391 days
Swim cancelled, so getting out for dog walk, it’s one of those beautiful frosty, blue skies days, so shall wrap up.
@Bassanova ongrats on 1 month 
@apes2020 you go girl being prepared is such a great feeling, well done on filling all those boxes. You moving? Somewhere close by? Be lovely to have a fresh start, we’ll done.
@Thirdmonkey congratulations on 1400 days
Have a good day all 
Another sober Saturday conquered.
Peace and strength to all.
Day 529
Went to see the kids’ presentations at school this morning. Then a little shopping, laundry, etc. About to take a nice bath, and then some creme brulee that I made (from a packet!), and if my kids let me have time to myself, read some more of my book. All good. 
I am indeed 
How exciting for you! You done amazing. Must feel all so exciting
30 days is huge, well done.
