Noon Check in
Experiencing anxiety from an unknown source. Also experiencing jealousy (?) with me comparing myself yet again to my friend and her family and her career and mayerial assets. I almost wanted to just distance myself from her but I chose not to and instead messaged her asking her about her day. Trying to remain grateful for what I have today and to realize we each are on our own journey. Did a diff 20 min guided meditation specifically on the root chakra. Amazing! Came out of it feeling almost dizzy and slightly disoriented but I havenāt gone that long before on a meditation. Learned abit about colors and how they impact the chakrasā¦ in this case red - root chakra. So wearing red or eating red foods etc help to ground when we wear or eat them with intention. Really cool! I feel grounded and calm. Have a few things more to do today 
feeling blessed 
Hey guys checking in day 22.
I want to share something I experienced yesterday which revealed some old emotional scars for me.
I was watching a TV series called raising dion. A guy called pat was my favourite character in the show. He was the very typical nice guy, was caring, always supported dion and her mom. He fell in love with dionās mom, nicole, but got rejected despite taking care of her family. He then got heartbroken and very desperate after watching nicole with another man.
During that scene I literally felt the heartbreak and desperation of pat. It ruined my mood. I finished the show, went to bed but I still kept thinking about pat. I started crying.
Then I asked myself why am I experiencing it. Its just a show. I try to dig deeper and then I remembered that I had been in similar situation where I got needy and desperate about a girl and she rejected me. I was always nice to her and back in the day that broke my heart when I got rejected. And this was 4-5 years before but still I had not process that feeling.
So before I slept I sat down, meditated and try to work these feelings of heartbreak. In the morning I felt the same and did the same thing.
I am just grateful that I had the opportunity to work on some old unresolved emotion and afterwards it made me happy. I chose to accept my emotions instead of running from it. I did not once think to go to my easy escape which is p*rn. I am very glad of that.
Thanks for the reading and have a pleasant day
@SelfLove_42. Hey man congrats on the big 90. So happy for you.
@ShadowFax hey thanks and I hope you are doing well.
@CATMANCAM thanks for your support. Means a lot to me. Happy to see you going strong in your journey.
@Beachcat805 Congrats on 2 weeks. Keep up the good work.
@TigerMatriarch Hey thanks and hope you are doing well.
That macaroon is beautiful! Thereās a really nice shine on it. What an achievement! Those little buggers can be tricky.
Checking in another day sober . I actually did it ! 1 month sober today ! 
Day 20. I wish alcohol was the problem.
Woooohooooo!
When people take their first 30 days it always brings me back to taking my first 30 days! Those days were the most difficult days of my recovery thus far. Thank you for the great reminder and congrats on stringing together 30 consecutive days. Super job.
Looks delish!
@Bran522 congrats on 6 weeks 
@Jonachav123 welcome back 
congrats on 3 days
@Cherry_Kisses congrats on 2 weeks
@anon52066378 congrats on 80 days and the promotion opportunity
@Beachcat805 congrats on 2 weeks
@Clarity safe travels 
@anon86198612 congrats on 30 days
@CleanJean congrats on 30 days
@Deep thank you 
@Gbw3006 congrats on your month
554 days no alcohol.
19 days no cocaine.
16 days no binge-eating.
The depression is on me again. I had to nap in the morning and again this afternoon. I forced myself out for a short walk to the shop. I bought a couple of chocolate bars and ate them when I got home, it could definitely be worse though.
The landlord has passed the sale over to a different estate agents now, they are coming on Thursday to take photos, my addict thinks this means that tomorrow we need cocaine, to do the cleaning, but Iām not listening to him.
Tonight Iāve just been to a CA meeting which was good. I didnāt share at all this week, but thanked the main sharer at the end and also bought a Big Book.
Iāve now got a migraine and sore throat, hoping itās just a cold from my walk in the rain the other night.
@SoberWalker So glad he is ok! Yes, drunk and emergency do not mix well. Glad u are out of it.
@Sunny11 Congratulations! Such a great achievement!
@Dansig 9 months! Well done!
@SelfLove_42 Fantastic!
@Jonachav123 Keep trying! You only fail when u give up trying.
@anon86198612 Congratulations!
@CleanJean Yay! Well done!
@Gbw3006 Congratulations!
Day 554
So happy to see all these milestones. It really cheered me. I am feeling a little down, another member of my aa online group has admitted that he has not actually been clean while attending meetings. I understand that getting sober takes time, and is not linear, but it still makes me sad.
Day 300 clean from self harm.
Still no good sleep. Also didnāt go to the library for school work. I keep telling myself Iām too exhausted to go. I cleaned off an area of my desk finally so unless I get super energized, Iāll just do my school work at home. Just having a hard time thinking clearly.
Every night feels bad lately. I think itās because Iām so desperate to sleep well. I just keep sobbing and hoping Iāll relax enough to sleep. But itās always nightmares and waking up a lot during the night.
Things are okay today. Ate a full meal. Really struggling with that but Iām going to force myself to keep it down. I canāt remember the last time I ate a meal.
very nice
Your going to start feeling the feels, people like us havenāt had to deal with real life and real emotions. Be kind to yourself, if you are in a position to right some wrongs then go for it but at the end of the day what is is what is, your now biulding some strong foundations to not make the same mistakes in the future. Wish you well on your journey
Aw Megan. First ! Wow. 300 days !!
Iām so sorry about the sleeping. I know how much it affects all aspects. Iām sending a prayer and a sleep fairy in the hope you get a few hours reprieve.
If you can, take a moment to celebrate yourself. You really deserve it.
Thank you so much. So are you 
Missed the numbers by 10 minutes : (
Donāt miss the alcohol, love the abundant energy I have!
Huns Bday today and off to moms to celebrate.
Happy sober 24 to you all friends!
Good thatās 10 minutes more sobriety 
they all count. Congrats and well done on your sober days
7.10 
The new lucky number! Congratulations!
39 days just checking in. Been fighting covid so havenāt thought much about checking in, feeling better today.