Checking in
Day 37
Feeling fine today (but as my old therapist used to say, “fine isn’t a feeling” lol), so I guess today I am feeling content? Not too sure what I’m feeling today to be honest. I had more weird dreams last night, not using dreams of anything but still very odd ones. Hubby is home for today as he is super uncomfortable but tmrw he will return to work. He barely slept last night. I guess today will consist of meditation and prayer. Taking care of a few errands and cleaning. I guess that’s it. Hope everyone has an addiction free day!
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January to March are the tougher months…congrat, good on ya
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Thank you! 40 days coming up tomorrow 
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I think day three was one of my hardest… Now I’m day 23!! Keep going. You’re doing great!
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Oh jeez, I hate those mix-ups.
I hope you’re appointment goes well!
Let me know 
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Day 602
Was definitely feeling an up the past few days but woke up really irritable and down this morning. Too many thoughts in my brain getting overwhelming right now.
My mum tends to communicate in ways that are very cryptic and get manipulative fast so went to sleep talking to my sister about that which always throws me off. Had some really weird dreams last night and didn’t want to get out of bed this morning.
Idk trying to snap out of it. Need to make more coffee and meditate. Probably going to clean up the house plants and get more seeds going in the greenhouse x playing in the dirt always helps when I get in a funk so here’s hoping it does the trick.
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Checking in
Day37
Saw this and really like it! I use the serenity prayer but didn’t know there was a flow chart!
I will definitly need to be using this today. I get really frustrated with my friend. I realize she’s busy, as am I. But I’m starting to feel this friendship become pretty one sided. She never used to be like this. She is super busy (I understand that, I really do), but it’s annoying when we will “talk” (as in I send her a msg asking how she is doing today, she responds when she can and asks me how I am doing, I respond and then I don’t hear from her for 1-2 days). Sometimes it has even been during times when I’m not feeling well (like when I increased my med that one day due to drs orders and I was not well mentally at all…she will just disappear, snd text me the next day or 2 saying she was worried about me, and asking how am I doing now?) Yet when something is going on for her, I’m all for helping her and supporting her. Maybe I need to back off a bit or have a very open talk about this. But I don’t want to come across as “weird” for feeling this way and I certainly don’t want to make her feel bad. Idk… it’s not like I have much experience with real clean and sober friendships I guess. Maybe I’m making a big deal out of it. My hubby thinks it’s very one sided. Maybe I’m just too available (so it can come across as if this is one sided). Maybe my expectations are too high and since this friendship isn’t what I’m expecting, I’m getting disappointed. Idk. Any thots?
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Waiting for paint to dry. Its raining. Today is day 18. Wednesday.
Its actually worked out so well that my day changes at 8pm, when i first set the clock.
If im sober til 8pm already, its easier to get through cravings. And its heartening to already be 15 hours in.
Truly tired of bullshit at my job but i also need to work on my shitty attitude and inattentive work ethic.
Anyone in their late twenties early thirties and feel stunted and immature? How to get past??
I know ive got things to offer this world sober.
Sigh. Reading the pdf of Sister Outsider I got, it opens on Audre Lordes trip to an African-Asian writers conference in Russia and Usbekistan in 1976. She writes so incisively about the cities, the landscapes, her interactions with others, her hope and fear for peoples. I wonder what shed think about today if she was still here.
I know what i wind up giving to the world, it wont be fast, but itll be the total of what i bring to each day. It would be easier if i wasnt reading headlines. With climate change, my dreams are so different than they might have been.
Well, today im looking forward to having ginger tea+honey and a book in the evening, after a long day.
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Hey guys just checking in day 10.
I hit a new PR on deadlift today which was 170kg. So am really tired. Gonna eat then bed time.
@SadMemeQueen Hey there. Congrats on reaching 3 weeks. Thats really good. Keep it up.
Have a nice day
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Congrats on day 37 and thank you for sharing this chart here. Truth!
My thoughts and experiences on desiring another human being to be there with me along certain walks in life and then they are not is real and I , too, have suffered and felt abandoned (if you will) by certain ‘friends’.
Then I remember that my higher power is in control and I believe nothing is by coincidence and when I put those two into the equation and also add that my ‘friends’ are human with their own stuff going on. I conclude that maybe God is trying to elevate me, strengthen me and get me to rely and depend upon Him and no one else. I’m also shown that I make it through such circumstances good all by myself yet the only un-good was my attitude and choice to hold a grudge or be discontented at what I wasn’t getting from another which then circles back around to my addiction and tendency to put me and my needs as center of attention and there I am… God revealing to me that I still have some stuff and character defects to address.
That’s just me though on my journey.
I encourage you to ask your higher power what it is, if anything, that you ought to be learning from this situation. Then after the answer comes then perhaps asking or setting a lunch date with said friend and ask about them.
Food for thought…
You are doing amazing sweet lady.
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Day 8.5
Just saw the sobriety clinic! If UA/blood tests go well I can be on Vivitrol by next Tuesday! 
I’m so excited! I’m gonna go grab a yummy tea at the comic shop to celebrate!
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Day 128 here.
Finished moving to my new Recovery home in the master room. I honored to be able to live with women who are mature and motivated in their own recovery. Little to no drama here.
Had my 4th interview with a great Ministry out here and very prayerful that I am chosen. If I’m not chosen then I know that it doesn’t mean a firm NO it only means a NOT YET. 
Encountered my first burst of old fury and murder with my mouth experience since getting clean this weekend. Someone said something to me that triggered old memories and feelings of being controlled, manipulated and lorded over, and I completely used my tongue to fire furious arrows at this person and it felt good. Then bad. Whew… I can be surely the perpetrator in my own nightmare and really glad it occured tbh. It revealed some more that I need to look at and work through with my therapist and God and it also brought myself and this other human closer. We both apologized and got to know each other a bit better and dig deep into old habits and past experiences that drew us both to be so immature and nasty with one another. Pride is a serious stumbling block.
I’m off to help a friend’s family with their company biz today. Taking service calls. The daughter of the family is also a Doula and she has three births this week. So I’m grateful to be asked and trusted to help.
Thankful I’m part of the solution today.
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O.M.G.
How amazing.
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Woooooohooooooo!
Congrats!
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Thank you. It’s great to be a toddler again!!
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This is SUCH a beautiful approach to this situation. Thank u sooo much for sharing. I often forget that everything is an opportunity for growth and an opportunity to learn. I will ask for guidance and insight when I sit down to pray soon. I’m not mad at her but the word “abandoned” that u mentioned rings true for me. Never really thot it as that until u mentioned it. I really appreciate you for sharing what u know. Thank u!!!
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WOW ☆☆☆☆☆ Great work!!!
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