Awesome!! I’ve got high hopes! 
The sobriety clinic people were amazing, and the place was so nice and clean. It felt very comfortable, and my new Dr really listened and talked to me like a person and not just an addict/patient. It was great! I’m actually excited to go to appointments and meetings - other than the witnessed UAs lmao! 
and thank you so much!!
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Just know your limitations man,
I look back and there are some people I could never be friends with again, our whole relationship was based on what we were sharing that day. But others it was like we had plenty in common just that using or drinking was a reason to get together I wish you the best man
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4 hours from day 7, my anxiety is so high since my DUI. I feel like I can’t breath and anxiety has never been a huge issue for me. It’s to the point of effecting my eating, breathing, sleeping. Any tips to get through anxiety? Meds are not an option being military. Much love.
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Are you currently enlisted like AGR or something? Meds are an option, In fact my first round of meds where when I was in the Army, that was 15 years ago and it has gotten more liberal since.
Also try different grounding techniques and meditations like the calm app
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Yea I’m AGR. Our last guy that went on anxiety meds got medically discharged…?
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Well I think your not getting the full story there,
Plus like you said you got a DUI, that could be more detrimental to your career than mental health, I don’t know your budget or the circumstances but my DUI lawyer handled mine in York and was a special case.
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Looking for a lawyer too but mine is first offense no damage just got pulled over kind of thing
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I’m going to PM you, I got mine there
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Please do!
Have you tried a meditation? I’ll send you a link…
This one has really helped me with anxiety/panic attacks
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No I haven’t but I’ll try it! Thank you for the link!
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I hope it helps. You will be ok. It must be so stressful. But I believe every moment in our life brings us to where we’re supposed to be even though it’s hard to see it. I haven’t been in your circumstance so I can’t speak with as much advice as perhaps @fury can.
I’m sorry you’re going through all of this♥️
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Thank you for your reassurances. I’m gonna try this meditation to see if it’ll help me calm enough to sleep. Thank you so much
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Day 603
Today was better than yesterday. Got my workout done, sun peaked out while I was doing my gratitude journal, got an iced coffee, ran errands and bought new seed trays to replace some that got destroyed in storage over the winter, started seeds in the greenhouse, cooked myself good meals, and watching hockey now.
There’s more things I could’ve used to get done but I’m happy to have pulled my head out of yesterday’s gloom and I’m grateful for all that today was. The bad days happen a lot less often lately and when they do they force me to slow down, ground myself, process shit, and learn who I am in this part of my life.
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Checking in Kinda,
So I almost came home with another guitar today,
I went for a in hole humidifier for im acoustic and I’m like oooooh
3 of my must have bucket list guitars and they had one, les Paul jr, If they had it in TV yellow it would be in my possession right now.
I went ahead and asked and they didn’t know when they could get one in.
I’ve noticed that I rationalize my spending based on well it’s better than spending it on booze or drugs which was ingrained in my head throughout my childhood. But I need bettter spending habits, anyone else have this issue?
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yess thank you so much, I really appreciate that and I think you’re right on all counts lol! I feel like I’m ready to make progress this time and let things go
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Day 159
I work remotely, but gotta work from the office once a month. Tomorrow is the day I have to drive up there. A little break from the kiddos, but I feel awkward around other human beings. Working from home messed me up 
.
Yall take care. Stay up.
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Day 23 of no self harm
Nothing of note today. Spent the day watching ink master and gaming. Feeling extremely tired today so I’m heading to bed a bit early. I’m doing okay today. Mostly numb and dissociative, but that is a good day for me unfortunately. Still learning how to be aware and present.
Much love to all of you beautiful people
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Work from home was a love hate relationship for me, I loved the fact I didn’t have to roll my ass out of bed until like 10 minutes before my shift, but it felt like my home was my job and that didn’t fly
We went back in July and now I’m like I’d kill to be able to sit on my deck and drink coffee and do my job while it’s nice out
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