I got the job! Thanks for asking 
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Proud of you too! 
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Iām proud of you too @Miranda ā¦ you are really focusing and doing everything you can to get through it and thatās what you have to do. Grateful your husband is as understanding and supportive as he is. You will never regret your decision not to drink. Big hugs to you and strength for success and for it to get easier for you.
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Matt you were the first person who reached out to me on this app and I will never forget the kindness in your welcome. Tomorrow when I wake up to have my quiet morning coffee I will be sending you some self-assurance vibes. I believe in you. Go toward what you want.
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Checking in. OMG I have to say this corona is unbeliveble. Maybe I just got it real hard, I never felt this bad. I know other have had it way worse, but this Is really awfull.
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So sorry to hear. Rest up and hope for a speedy recovery
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I thought Iād share some things that irritated me yesterday in my home group. Itās pretty new and we have a kind of head still around. Itās completely free, no program so thatās maybe the challenge. So he asked us what weād hope or expect in case of relapses in the group. I said that I hope the person to be honest and having enough trust to come back. One said that he didnāt think that the group could be of help when āes hart auf hart kommtā (kind of getting tough, when you really really struggle). Well, thatās what I think meetings are for. He was saying that he was a bit nervous now with spring and covid restrictions completely lifted to be out and seeing his old friends and everyone high. I offered him help by saying to text at any time when he was in need. Another woman said that in case of relapse she couldnāt stand people getting on her nerves. It showed me a deep engrained understanding that we have to deal with this alone. But I learned here that this is not a good approach. Let people help me. Donāt let a slip develop in a long period of relapse, self pity and destruction.
I still have to think about it. What to expect from this group.
I wish everyone a happy Easter!
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Day 99 AF
Went for a lovely drive through the countryside today and had a picnic in the Botanical Gardens in Castlemaine.
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To me thatās called digging your own grave. I agree with you 100% Freundin. We do this together and please check in here (or there) BEFORE giving in to the urge. Maybe the most important purpose of any group. You do you. Might help one or two others but most certainly yourself.
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Good morning all, Day 7 today.
I am sorry to those that are struggling at the moment. Still quite weak so canāt name all, but have read every single post.
Hope you all have a lovely Easter break. Is it a Bank holiday everywhere else? We have a lovely 4 day break here, most of mine will be spent in isolation but at least there is chocolate on Sunday!
@Wakikki I am sorry you are struggling so much. I am āluckyā in that it is just a bad cold for me at the moment. My husband seems to be struggling more than me, just exhausted himself going up the stairs to give my daughter a towel. Take really good care of yourself. I am taking so many vitamins (includinf C, D and zinc) and drinking lots of fluids - anything to help. Sending lots of sympathy as sounds like you have a nasty case.
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Good morning on day 42 
For those of you who have been wondering where I am, Iām still going strong.
Iām just busy with being lazy 
Have a beautiful sober day team
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I felt lousy too, despite being triple vaccinated. Itās hard to be grateful when youāre feeling like that, but I kept thinking how much worse it could have been without the vaccinations.
This too shall pass.
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Despite being pretty content with most of my life, some parts still bug me.
Yesterday I ran into one of those parts on a meeting.
A female I talk with often after a meeting shared about a miscarriage she had 8 years ago and the pain in her eyes was so visibleā¦ so I wanted to tell her I felt for her, that I was sorry that had happened to her.
Instead, we talked and laughed for almost an hour after the meeting, but I didnāt say a word about it. Tried several times, but it just didnāt happen.
Back home I texted her to say what I wanted to say.
This is just one of the things I canāt seem to change. I know I shouldnāt be too hard for myself, but this is exactly why people tend to believe autists donāt have empathy. I definately dĆ³ have it, but I canāt respond to it like a normal person would and that bugs me.
But on the other hand, this was actually the first time a situation like this happened with me being 100% aware of it. And being able to turn it into a slightly more acceptable situation by just texting the words afterward. Itās not a normal verbal reaction, but at least itās something.
Strangest part about it is, I focussed on it for 30 minutes as object of a meditation, but I really havenāt got a clue what causes this inability to just say how someoneās words make me feel sorry for them.
My throat just locks up the wordsā¦
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Yes, really good point. I am so grateful for the vaccinations (also triple). How long did you feel rough for? I started on Monday and now donāt seem to be getting worse, just not improving either.
That is really interesting and from my perspective it sounds like you did really well. You were there for her afterwards, and provided the support she needed, before following up with the text. It may be that while she felt OK with sharing she was giving off signals that she didnāt want to discuss it after? I am very good at empathy, could share my deepest thoughts and then offer sympathy to someone, but am rubbish at receiving it! It would make me so uncomfortable. The way you handled it would have been perfect for me as I would have been able to read it in my own time, process it and then respond.
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Yes thats true. I only had two shots, for some reasons I dont think its allowed dicuss. But yeah I think it could be way worse, and some People really have it way worse. Hope to feel better soon. Just lying under duvet on couch drinking water, eating paracet and feel sorry for my self.
Hi Jenny,
Sorry to hear youāre feeling under the weather, sounds like youāre doing all the right things to help.
Hope you manage to have a restful weekend. Take care 
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Thankx for the reply, had to think about it for a while. Never occured to me that there might be factors in the other playing a part in it.
But no, this really is just something thatās just me. Something most autists seem to have in common - we just canāt respond normally to empathy.
There were no signals she didnāt want to discuss it, in fact several others dĆd come to her, hugged her and wished her strength.
Nevertheless, the moment I think about doing so, I simply block.
But well, baby steps.
When I started my journey, my main goal was having more empathy and compassion in my life.
So learning itās always been there, just not within my reach, was a first step. Now itās in my reach. I reckognise it, welcome it, listen to it. I just canāt respond to it. Yet.
At least not in the direct setting.
But a text message is a start 
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You are right and sounds like real progress. Donāt underestimate what you were able to give, through just laughing and talking for so long. I am sure she really valued that too
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Aaah, thank you
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