Checking in daily to maintain focus #42

The fact that you are so aware is super important. Remember it’s not starting over, now you have more tools to help you get an even longer streak

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Late and also 2nd checking in at day 245.
I’m almost done with my late shift. But I’m working at a location I’ve never been before and it was quite a long drive. Then I found out that I was working in another province (state). In this area I knew they speak in a dialect but OMFG I couldn’t understand anyone the whole shift🙉As if they spoke Chinese both the clients and the staff. In my work industry, the clients are often so low-level that they don’t talk, but these people were of a higher level and they were chatting to me all day and I couldn’t understand anything🙈Please let these 2 hours pass quickly and I’ll never come here again😳I’m tired😅

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Music to my ears.
Love you.
:orange_heart::seedling::dizzy:

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Day 2.5 alcohol free. I did 30 days in january and went back to old habits. Im trying to get healthier because alcohol really doesnt help my mental health. Im finding my witching hours are between 5pm and 8pm so you will see me posting alot.

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Evening everyone, about to hit 25 days here.

Absolutely exhausted, was thinking about bed, and then watched the first 3 minutes of the Liverpool match. May have to stay up after all! :grin:

Feeling quiet today, have been reading but not really writing. Just really tired. Will contribute more tomorrow.

Congratulations everyone hitting milestones.

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Good afternoon!
Grateful to be sober today. I attended a early afternoon AA meeting and then did some errands. I’m on the hunt for a job. I have 2 interviews scheduled this week. One face-to-face and the other a ZOOM meeting. Waiting to hear back on next steps for a position in Memphis, Tennessee. That is the job I really want!

Tomorrow is my Sweetheart’s birthday, so I’ll need to wrap up her gift and pick out a dessert to celebrate with the family.

All in all, I’m having a pretty good day.

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Hi @deep, I too relapsed earlier this week. I understand the disappointment. It really sucks. I spoke with my sponsor and my wife. No secrets any more. Back to the drawing board, however, I’m learning that I can be sober as long as I stick to the plan. I’m attending more meetings as I believe they help. The more meetings the better.

Let’s do this together! You can do it!
Take care,
Mike

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Sociology was the minor for my 1st bachelor’s degree. I loved it so much that I almost had a double major . Are you working towards criminology?

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My degree is criminal justice. So along that field, yeah. It’s something I never get tired of studying

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Hello dear friends. Checking in on day 326 with a big bottle of sparkling water. Did not sleep well last night. Hoping tonight goes better because tomorrow is a big day for me. Sober on!

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Scheduled for may tenth. Hoping they can really help me out with my mental health as well. I’m sick of just feeling like this big sex crazed drug junkie. I don’t understand my mind and it’s like I try to hard to understand it and when I’m sober it’s just so tiring, I don’t want to be sober and just sleep all the time I want to have fun and do stuff with my girls and be successful. I know it’s a get up and do it thing and stop making excuses but I just don’t know how to do or be human even when I had my year I was still all over the place and confused about who I am.

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Happy to hear this, Mike. You’re doing the right thing getting help. I went to therapy for awhile and it was so good to talk to a neutral person who made me feel heard and understood where I was coming from. IOP is really going to help with that and building your tool box. You’re not alone but we have to take the first action step outside of ourselves. Well done and can’t wAit to hear how it goes!

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Day 94 AF, day 5 PMO free.

I got about 1 click away from PMO, not even sure what kept me from it. I’m desperately trying to find replacements this week. Cigs here and there and binging redbulls… dont even like redbull that much. I’m currently smoking a pack of cigs cause it brings back all the memories alcohol gave me, I miss it so much. Guess I’ll start my no cig/caffeine streak tomorrow. Then what… guess it’s because I’m not talking enough with people. I keep postponing meetings because they scare me to death. Even after 10 weeks of heavy group therapy in a 24/7 clinic I was too anxious to share. I’ve so many negative thoughts, I put myself down at every chance and dismiss any compliments going my way. I’m such a dumbass. Just to end it on a positive: got accepted for a job today. That’ll help to put some structure into my days. Have a great day everyone, grateful I’m still sober :pray:

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I am really glad that you are doing this for yourself. You deserve that life you want Mike, and you’re right it is hard work, but once you get the right gear on the hike isn’t a treacherous. I am so grateful to be on this journey with you.

:orange_heart::seedling::dizzy:

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If he were neuro-typical I would absolutely let him learn from his mistakes. But in this case just leaving him to do it himself would be leaving him to drown school-wise. He had adhd, and an abnormally low working memory. It doesn’t help that Japanese jhs have an insane number of textbooks. Each main subject, and there are five main subjects, have at least three books each, and the same material is on different pages in each. The layout of the question pages and answer pages is super hard to understand too.
I always let him do by himself first, but he just sits and says he doesn’t know. Then if I point out questions and ask pertinent questions he can answer some. He also has some issues with motivation and self-esteem. If someone is with him encouraging and praising he will try, but otherwise he will just give up straightaway.

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Hi everyone, am on day 2, just had 5 months of a bender after 13 months sober. I am determined to do this so will be holding myself accountable by checking in every day.
Thanks

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I did sociology at uni too :purple_heart:, double major with Japanese studies.

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Really glad to hear this :purple_heart:

Liverpool going to the final I heard on the radio on my way back from work🥳

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Day 63 of no self harm.

I had a job interview today. I’m not sure how it went. I hope I get it, but the job I’m really wanting I interview for on Thursday. (They’re both customer service but I want this second job because it has a sign on bonus)

Had quite a bit of school to do today. I procrastinated as per usual and ended up having 8 hours to do a week of work. I always manage to get it done though.

I’m starting to really enjoy talking with my gf. I always have, but we message the majority of the day now and it never gets tiring. We never talked this much before but I’m really loving it.

I’m doing okay I think. No urges or self destructive cravings so far today. Probably because I’ve been worried about school and my interview. But it’s the first day in a while I haven’t thought about suicide. I hope that sticks tonight since night are particularly rough. But even if tonight is bad, this is the most stable I’ve felt during the day in a while.

Something positive: I’m learning to open up with my gf.

I hope you all have an amazing and sober day

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