Thanks Menno, imagine me in my pink Muppets “animal” onesie and wearing that sneakers. At least it makes me smile 
Enjoy your day Menno and PS: that windows are going to be cleaned by the rain 
Read somewhere that there’s even a possibility for a small tornado where I live in the south😵
Yesterday it rains so heavy overhere that the rain came in trough a leak. Put pans on the floor to protect the floor from the water. But my banana trees in our yard where happy with all that rain.
We’ll see how it develops today 
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I’ve certainly started having more sleep after 2 weeks sober but the nights are feeling really really long due to all the bad/weird dreams I’m having. Think it’s just my brain adjusting to the change and being able to actually get some proper REM sleep for a change.
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Nice purchase Claudia 
When you are fully recovered and that will happen faster than you think you can go for a test walk with them yay 
The situation sucks now but it’s really going to be okay 
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Have a nice day Menno. I just heard on the news that it’s going to rain a lot. Now the weather is still very nice. Nice picture looks a little bit different than the other pictures from your window.
This looks like a different part of Amsterdam, nice
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Whoa!!! Hope your ok man! Thats scary
Owwwww a fellow jordan advocate I see love the blue black colour way…
My last few purchases have been a few light football grey dunks. I think this month I’m back up to 6 pairs 
opps lol 
I also got a dope pair of lows that I’m loving… obviously i don’t wear any of them, they just sit in there boxes looking pretty lol
There my latest for this month… it’s clearly an addiction that isn’t under control lol @Dazercat but I do resell so I do profit from my purchases
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Checking in 1 month 4 days. It’s late, I’ve had a long day of driving and flying. Man was flying a TEST for ME! I am not a fan of barreling thru the sky in a metal tube, and even tho I understand the science behind it, I do not trust how tf an airplane just flies, and stays flying 
and USUALLY im a wee bit inebriated by the time i get on the plane… but not today Satan! I managed to white knuckle thru take off sober, distract myself with fun math (sudoku) in flight, then breathe thru landing. All in one sober piece. Fun part is I get to do this again in 4 days when I go home yay me!
However, im excited for the weekend! Pedicures with the best friend tomorrow followed by bbq. Her husband is sober so I won’t be alone on that. Then off to the mountains here for my cousins wedding Sat! Ugh it’s going to be so beautiful 
goodnight sober friends 
“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new” -Socrates
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Dope collection! LOVE the first pair with the green and leopard 
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Hi, I have tinnitus too, it’s awful isn’t it? Some times are louder than others and different noises too. It can get annoying. Do you have anything you do to relieve it?
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Day 241 checking in
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Just a quick check in… We got approved for our second home!! All the waiting, and bidding at auction and anxiety was worth it. A nice upgrade for our family and a chance to invest in our future by renting a second property!
Finally moving away from the bar across the road. Our new place has a pool and it’s near hiking tracks in the estuary, close to my sons school and football oval.
I’m so excited for the future 
just wanted to share!
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That sounds like a really positive step Alycia, congratulations!
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Hello. Talked with my nurse today. I will now go three times a week there at least to get Antabus. Just can’t afford to go on full on relapse but after my slip I noticed the romanticizing of drinking began. At least 3 months of Antabus fow now plus in queue for therapy.
Anyway, I do want to stay sober. It sucks that I relapsed but I was able to contain it - this time. Another time, who knows. Shouldn’t play with that fire. An addict can’t afford to just “have a few” 🤷
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Sounds like you are acknowledging danger, and getting right to prevention, sounds smart to me.
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Jenna, I’m proud of you for being so proactive. Good on you! Sounds like a good plan. I’m in the queue for therapy for the first time! Hope you get a spot quickly.
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Howdy, amigos! I followed through and am in line for therapy with someone in my network that I selected and that feels like a good fit. I was told I should hear back within a month or less. Glad I attended to that straight away. I thought I would feel nervous but I mostly feel resigned…I guess because I was somewhat resistant for so long, or at least ambivalent. I thought a lot about therapy and knew rationally it would be a good thing for me but anxiety held me back. I tried online/virtual therapy during the pandemic and got some good work done but ultimately it was hard to get that relationship to mesh and I fell off. I have hope this will be a better experience.
My low mood seems to be shifting somewhat to a lot of rumination, overactive brain and some intrusive thoughts. I guess it makes sense that addressing the low feelings swings me to the opposite end of the spectrum and now I really am having to practice quieting my mind. More quiet space during the day helps, just being with my thoughts and being proactive about shifting my thinking rather than the constant distractions of podcasts, public radio in the background all day, binge watching tv shows, even music that helps me when I’m low. It is helping to be mindful of my surroundings, listen to the sounds outside, focus on my senses. This is nothing new, I just haven’t had to access these tools in a while. It works.
Let’s get another sober day in the books, eh? 
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Unbelievable achievements! Awesome pal! 
Checking in at day 262.
I’m a little frustrated and irritated. As I mentioned yesterday at my Check-in, I am quite ill with a 39 degrees fever and a cold. As a result, I missed an appointment with my counselor at addiction care. I’ve never missed an appointment and it’s really not a big deal because I don’t really follow a treatment but it was just a chat about how I am doing. But I did need repeat prescriptions for my medication, so I texted my counselor to tell the doctor to send repeat prescriptions to my pharmacy. However, he was not responding to my text messages. So I called the facility and the operator left him a callback request. He calls me back at the end of the day with a bit of a vague story but about the repeat prescriptions he said there was no doctor until Wednesday so he would ask Wednesday right away. And he said luckily you still have a prescription for the methadone but the diazepam will be run out so you will have to wait with that until Wednesday. But I was so sick that I didn’t realize what he was saying. Later the pharmacy called me that they would like to prepare my medication and had called the institution but they were told that I had missed an appointment and there was nothing they could do for me. But the fact that I missed an appointment has nothing to do with my repeat prescriptions and should be prescribed by the doctor, not the counselor. So why is this info passed on to the pharmacy? So later it dawned on me what a bad institution/counselor I have. Firstly, it is possible that there is 1 day without a doctor, but not 6 days without a replacement. Secondly, if you do not take diazepam, you will get just as many withdrawal symptoms as with methadone. So I called them this morning and asked if they would like me to buy medication illegally. And what if I didn’t have a prescription for methadone? Should I have taken drugs to keep from getting sick when I’m doing so well? I only take a very low dose because I have already reduced a lot, but from a little to nothing in one go, you still get withdrawal symptoms. I’m really going to file a complaint and I want another counselor. This is so unprofessional and I have never experienced this before.
I don’t know how to solve this yet. The medication keeps me partially stable and I’m afraid of what’s to come. It stresses me out. And all because of the addiction care itself. Unbelieveable!
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Hey all, checking in on day 705. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Day 707 clean and sober today. I hope everyone has a kick ass day today, love you guys!!! 
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