Awesome news Mike! Thinking of you.
2 Likes
Hey everyone. Got busy yesterday but 10:30 pm last night I officially hit 3 weeks sober that big ā21ā that they always say is the habit forming timeframe. Well I donāt believe that. Anything can cause a slip up no matter how long. Today was especially tough for a bit and it was the first trip to a grocer that sells alcohol and past two liquor stores alone. All alone and I managed to come out on top. The going to store wasnāt why it was tough it was just some other stuff going on that I could feel myself wanting to slip away and avoid conflict. Well either way itās strange that we anticipate that big ol 21st birthday like itās socially engrained into us from a young age. For me I was drinking at 14 and my parents allowed it even laughed the first time I slept with the porcelain goddess. I wonāt put my kids through that.
18 Likes
Day 25. Just got done with a good workout and now going to watch some Stranger Things and relax. Starting to realize sobriety is all about mindset. Keep your mind going and active so you donāt fail to think about partying and drinking. Hope everyone has had a great and blessed week!
18 Likes
Day 94 of no self harm.
Iām alive and safe. Thatās all I really have going for me at the moment. My birthday coming up always sends me into a spiral like this. Itās just another reminder that Iām still a disaster after all this time. I just really need this job to start so I have something to work on to keep me busy.
19 Likes
Day 90
Cooked for the first time in a while. Baked cookies that are ok, good with coffee.
Watched the entirety of āLittle Fires Everywhereā
Watercolor paint - finished some abstract pieces.
Ive lost about 2 weeks of wages because of this sprained ankle.
Lots of seltzer.
Still dont think i have my brain fully back. All i can do is continue each day and try.
18 Likes
Made it to the end of my trip: 5 hours driving (and listening to some good audiobooks 
- probably my fave part of driving actually). Tomorrow Iām attending a conference with a good friend. I like these kind of meaningful events. I find them fulfilling. They take prep for sure and they take time but man it feels nice.
Then back into the rhythm of life when Iām done here. Iām learning to dance that: project / event, process / rhythm. We have one time things in life but the growth, the learning, the evolution: thatās a process. So I need to be just as aware of the processes in my life as I am of the projects.
@Alycia totally get it about the social hunger. For me I had to re-examine my whole sense of āhow to hang around other humans and what that looks likeā when I started my sober journey. What I have now feels fulfilling and it is the result of social experiments Iāve been doing, who I feel comfortable with and where. Keep experimenting and be gentle and forgiving with yourself, and youāll find spaces that feed your desire to connect.
@michaeljlogan74 Ouchie about that dog running off and you scraping your leg. Iāve had family members pull muscles and twist joints in similar situations. It hurts! Good on you for the snacking and the soul music. Both of those feed the soul. They also are safe and legal - and thatās a sober trick: youāre allowed to do anything thatās safe and legal, to maintain your sobriety. Itās that simple. Keep it up brother, one day at a time
@Tomek welcome to the ADD club! Come on in, itās a good place to be. Youāve got a race car brain thatās living in a non-race-car world, which is a weird experience; but now that you are aware, you can choose your spaces and your interactions to help you be your full, unique, strong self. Rob started a thread recently you might find interesting: ADD/ADHD diagnoses at a later age
Take care everyone. You belong and you matter
19 Likes
Day 674
Forcing myself to take it easy but getting restless. Crutches make getting around so slow. I miss my long meandering morning walks. Grateful the pain has still been minor today, Trying to remember to take it one day at a time. Looking forward to being able to take off the bandages tomorrow and take a look at how things are healing.
26 Likes
Evening Check In
Day 109
Busy day. Hubby and I got new phones eith new contracts. Actually ended up saving money on our phone bills. Not much but maybe $40. Had to log into TS and set my clean time counter for drugs/alcohol and smoking and had to go back to find my quit dates lol. Anyway, all is well. Got to see the movie setup for the Last of Us. Cool cars!
23 Likes
Hi Jenny, great to see you back at 7 days and are feeling strong. I too am feeling a bit complacent and need to up my game. I donāt want a drink but realise its always lurking and waiting.
Have a great day 
5 Likes
Oh my friends and everyone here I am going to get honest. I have trelapsed, not on meth or opioids but on alcohol and benadrylā¦
My addict said 'Itās just one drink and it Lwrill be fine my boyfriend can supervise my drinking.
My addict said nobody will ever know if I use responsibly
My addict said you are more social and sexy on alcohol and drugs
Thatās about it as to reasons why. Behaviors indicating a relapse (my sponsor knew even knew I had.
I started not going to meetings every day
I stopped doing stepwork.
I totally started making things ilike watching a sports game at a sports bar a priority instead of going to a meeting
I stopped asking my Higher Power every day to help keep me clean
I stopped checking in on this forum was
I didnāt call my sponsor before I picked up for dome reason likely thought she would stop my addict from picking up and my addict didnāt want that.
Although I had been trying for a month at least to keep my relapse secret? I Phoned my sponsor tonight at midnight and got honest. She said she kinda knew I had relapsed but she was waiting for me to get honest and call her.
All the time I did know that Honesty was critical and thatās what eventually get up the courage to admit the relapse and come back on here.
So, I Will be ok. I have come to you my fellow addicts and gotten honest. I have been honest with my sponsor.I Ihave not gotten honest yet with my psychiatrist and addictions doc and family doctor. I have not yet told my parents or brother, but I will.
So the plan is today to go to a meeting and surrender, pick up a white keytag and not lie all-out ny clean dateā¦ My sponsor will drive me.
Ii am disappointed in myself because I used, disappointed I I used. I knew better.
Ok folks tomorrow is Day 1. I know I will be loved and accepted here and at NA
Hi, I Kat and Iām an addict
36 Likes
1092
Coffee. Weekend. First two days working at the detox were really good. Feels like coming home. Shared a little bit of the knowledge I gained -mainly here- in the last couple of years. Went down well.
After work I went to my old local and sat outside with the same old crew for a bit. At least a year ago I last was there. Absolutely nothing changed. it was good to see an old friend, but an hour among the drinkers was more than enough to realize Iāve changed way too much to ever fit in there again. In fact I never really fitted in there except for the shared boozing we did.
Never again. Iām sober and clean and thatās the only way I want to be. One day at a time. Have as good a weekend as you all can friends. Make it clean and sober or nothing will come of it. Love from Amsterdam.
@kat261 Itās good to see you Kat. Welcome back and see you again tomorrow.
29 Likes
#Day 1354 
Going to work for a few houres for the first time in 3 weeks! Looking forward to it! Also did 1 hour rehersal with my samba band yesterday evening, it was so nice to play again!
Glad Iām back living again instead of being on the couch 
I never had cravings in those 3 weeks. I think back in the old days I would have because I felt sorry for myself and thought I deserve a drink, ore 2, ore many.
This time I also pity myself but cheered myself up with buying a new bag.
And the next day? No hangover but still own that gorgeous bag! 
Yesterday I didnāt walked so an older picture today from the community garden a few days ago. An Artisjok/ Artichoke.
Have a nice saturday TS people!
24 Likes
Glad you are here again. In Dutch I would said āje bent een bikkel!ā It means you are a tough person. It take courage to admit where you are.
But itās a step forward again. Well done!
5 Likes
Glad the surgery went well Jess and you are not in a lot of pain. I do understand the feelings you are dealing with. Take it easy!! 
2 Likes
Hi all,
This is just a quick questionā¦
When you reply to a post and your reply goes on the bottom of the thread, is there a way to get back to where you were reading on the thread? I have to scroll back until I see the heart that Iāve liked.
2 Likes
Hi Kat. Thanks for your honesty. Welcome back, thereās always room. Weāre here if you need us. 
2 Likes
Day 63
Not bad, figured things out, keeping myself busy and going day by day. Finished a really nice 7 day self esteem meditation series and Iām on to the next
15 Likes
Hi @kat261 . It takes a lot of courage and strength to admit when you have relapsed. You have realised that you are off course and now you are correcting it. The work you did before you relapsed isnāt gone.
You are picking yourself back up again and going again. That is definitely something to be proud of.
3 Likes
Thank you so much, it is actually a huge relief. It was taking a lot of energy lying to myself, and constantly assessing what was OK, and what wasnāt.
3 Likes