Pimping it with 2 years of sobriety! Huge congrats friend. Awesome achievement.
5 Likes
Thank you!!! I feel strange lol yet so very blessed and in shock sort of lol
1 Like
Day 10. Working everyday until next Friday. I donāt mind, itās just a crazy schedule this week.
I also have a deadline for a training thatās due before next Friday. Iām a chronic procrastinator. Lol But, Iām very close to having it done.
Part of this training involves Trauma Informed Yoga. I learned a lot about myself in this training. Iām fairly certain I have ācomplex traumaā that began turning into a form of PTSD. This is self diagnosed but actually feels to be an accurate description of what has happened to me over the past 6 years.
Have a great day everyone!
13 Likes
Congratulations to be the first week sober!
1 Like
What u wrote hereā¦ made me tear up on the bus haha its like my current reality is written in front of me. Like holy crap! Like really I am! I couldnāt even go 3 days clean for the LONGEST time and those 3 days clean were brutal to say the least. Just obsessive thinking and trying to find ways to get money and manipulating people and pawning/selling stuff for dope. Like I. Really. Am. Doing. This! And TS has played SUCH a huge part of my recovery. I know I couldnāt have done it without everyoneās support and motivation. Along with my HP and hardwork I do have 4 months. And it scares me alot but at the same time Iām excited for what is in store for me. I love u lady 
thank u for the beautiful post hugs
12 Likes
Aha!!!
Thereās the other half of my twin brothers!!!
Congrats on your 2 years clean my friend, your calm, constant support on this forum is amazing. I am so happy for you!!!
Omg @Nordique I thought I responded to you, sorrrrry.
4 Likes
Good evening all, checking in on day 298. Beautiful day today, spent a lot of the day landscaping and getting my magnolia tree in and cleaned up. This week is my wifeās birthday, so we are going to a literal castle for a dinner date tomorrow night and then the following day we won a photography session in a silent auction, so busy week. Also had an interview to work at an independent senior living home at the front desk, very little manual labor so wonāt aggravate my back or knee. And part time so still gives me time for school, but also gives me a purpose, and will cover my car payment. Hope all is going well for everyone. Take care and stay safe.
19 Likes
Congratulations on 4 months girl! You are kicking ass. So proud of you and your journey 
1 Like
Checking in. Still sober. I am getting burnt out from work and I have been just so tired after work I just want to lay around and eat and not work out. I want my motivation back because I have lost 20+ pounds but I keep fluctuating. Anyway I am doing good in my relationship w my bf and I picked my classes for school which starts in Augustā¦ I am still on my step one but I am close to being done. I am meeting w my sponsor who has 14 years clean tonight and going to a womanās meeting that I really love. I just want this tired feeling and need for rest to go away so I can keep accomplishing my goals. Anyway , I am grateful to be clean and alive. Life is good 
15 Likes
Day 25 - Today was a better day. I went in to work (as opposed to working from home) and had a productive day. I also looked at what was bothering me the most and causing my addiction to be front and centre of my existence. Mainly it was my lack of a permanent place to live and feeling powerless to do anything about it.
So I took back control of that situation and rang around local estate agents. Now I have 4 property viewings this week. It felt like progress, in so many ways.
A positive end to a couple of hard days. On to the next one!
19 Likes
Hey guys checking in 77 days.
Iām working more on involving some meditation to help with my anxiety and depression. And Iām reading (well listening and crocheting because my hyper ass canāt sit still and read much anymore).
I just finished we are the luckiest which I enjoyed. Iām considering reading the body keeps score next, or atlas of the heart. Iāll decide later.
I also have deleted some of my social media apps. I think I was doing way to much comparing myself to others, which was not helpful at all. Trying to battle this feeling of loneliness, while seeing all these people doing all these things with all their friends, was not helpful.
I know Iām making progress, My life is getting better day by day focussing on my health and sobriety. I just need to remember not to compare my journey with anyone else. Itās not a race. Itās little and big changes that will add up over time.
Anyway- great to see you all kicking butt. Big numbers up here lately. Keep it up, so happy for you all.
Thanks for reading, have a great day
17 Likes
day74
If anybody remembers my previous conversation about my son, who is 5 and has non verbal asd, the last week or more has been extremely challenging.
He has been having so many more screaming tantrums and a firm solid somewhat louder voice will not stop him, bear hugs, counting or breathing exercises will not stop him, weighted blankets will not stop him.
Really the only thing that stops him is himself or sometimes putting him in a bath, and Sometimes nothing except time alone in his room in the dark.
I hate listening to him kick and scream knowing thereās nothing I can do and feeling so powerless because he cannot tell me what is wrong.
He does not like his noise reducing headphones.
We have a tablet with his songs that he loves, sometimes that will work and sometimes it wonāt and he will try to break it in half.
We have him in so many therapies and school as well; we also work hard to make sure he does fun activities that he likes and all of it is balanced to give him enough break time as well.
I am tired and I feel broken as a parent because there is nothing I can do for my son right now other than continue to be by his side while he screams in anger because the world does not understand him. Because I do not understand him.
Eta- There are successes, there are good times and there are Also very wonderful moments where weāre able to figure out the problem together.
Iām not completely unable to resolve his issues by any means, Iām actually usually pretty good at figuring it out, but lately it has just been so much more than I am used to.
He is getting very bad separation anxiety lately and there is no easy way for us to part without him having a screaming fit no matter what we do.
I am his person and he struggles to be away from me.
We have a communication tablet but he is still very early in the process of learning how to utilize that so it is still a moment by moment situational struggle to try and keep him regulated.
19 Likes
Good job !!
I really feel for u girl. Ur not a bad parent. A bad parent wouldnāt even care what their child is needing or attempt to try and fix it. I know u said uv tried a communicarion device but would a picture book be abit easier to start with? I often use picture books for my clients to tell me what hurts, or what food they want, or what they need. I usually give options of 2 or 3 so that it isnt overwhelming for them to choose and then they point to what they want. Not sure if u have tried any of these. I often really feel for my clients and ur child or anyone who has any form of disability bcuz the world they live in is so very different from what we relate to. The communication book I use is basically laminated little pictures and then they can choose, for example, tired, hurt, or hungry. They would choose one. Then from there u can offer 2 or 3 new choices. Say they choose hungry. Then u can maybe show them food or drink. Etc. It takes some practice but if u think ur 5 year old would find this helpful maybe one of his therapists can assist with this. I often use social stories also to help with tye transition frok one activity to another. Basically its a visual story of what is going to happen and then I give my client time to process what is said. It may prepare him for that seperation from u. I think its hard either way 
but im just throwing out ideas to help. Disregard any of course u dont think would help as u obviously know ur little one the best. I truly hope u find some comfort in today. And for ur little one too hugs
5 Likes
Awesome stuff! I know im kinda worried about sober camping but you are proof to me that its possible and enjoyable. Glad you got back home rested!
2 Likes
Beautiful number of ODAATs @Alycia and it sounds like you are taking positive steps in the self care department! Yah you!
2 Likes
226
Had another good day of training at work . Trying to approach the job just like I approach my recovery. One day at a time ā¦ It doesnāt mean inside my head I already have a Beach house and a boat ā¦ Then I have to come back to reality. Maybe that stuff will happen down the line ā¦ maybe not ā¦ I would be more happy just being OK with myself and healthy. I find myself these days thinking about all kinds of things. I donāt mind looking back anymore and I donāt mind looking forward but What really matters is what I do today. I definitely made it through a rough couple months but at the same time it really wasnāt even that bad. Sometimes recently I think why now ? Why do I get this now? But then I realize these questions are normal but I canāt look at it that way. I was biking home today and I thought how do I have this many days? To be honest I know exactly how I have this many days. AA, TS, God ( Mother Nature ) , music , nature , communication, journaling, exercise ā¦ Iām not sure if any of this made sense. Iām just really grateful. And Iām not letting my guard down. Thank you guys so much for listening to me and reaching out all the time. You guys are helping meā¦ reading through all the threads and stories and strength on this site ā¦ this community is powerfulā¦ stay strong family 
14 Likes
@mamador congrats on 74 days. The situation with your son sounds very challenging. I hope just writing it down helped bc i have no advice but wish you lots of patience and love!
3 Likes
Congratulations Dana!
So so proud of you!
Smashing it!!
4 Likes
And this is the most important thing, I think. It is ok to be tired, it sounds like you are doing your absolute best, which is all you can do 
.
3 Likes