Hey! I haven’t checked in for a while. Happily I’m still sober, now at day 211!
I’m excited to start the three day weekend in such a healthy spot. I’m still swimming most mornings, sleeping well, and continuing to make it through one day at a time. I’m very lucky.
My husband has joined the journey, and he’s 30 days in now! He’s had some experience with this, went six years sober once before. He decided it was time to go again. So we are starting out our summer with a step in the right direction.
The school year is winding down and I’m looking forward to some time off this summer. I’m planning to camp and read and write some curriculum this summer. My garden is getting off to a slow start due to weird weather, but it will catch up.
I wish you all a lovely holiday weekend and I hope you find peace and a sense of calm each day.
Today was a red journal day just because of one person. As soon as I started talking to them I immediately felt the need to just drink. I didn’t I’m sober still and watched my son play tball not his best game but his team won again. 11:0 for the season. I’m getting ready to play some video games (I’m not a big gamer) as a distraction for an hour. After that one hour of my tv show I’m watching. Then sleep stories on calm app.
I have to vent. The hubby is being a moody asshole to me today. Ive done nothing to him. I think apart of him is threatened by my resolve to stay sober and making sober buddies. He’s already told me on multiple occasions that he doesnt want to have to change his lifestyle because he likes drinking. Hes a big drinker too but wont admit it to himself. Oh well, live and let god. Dont get me wrong he said he wont bring booze in the house and supports me BUT i get the feeling hes threatened by my newfound growth. Im just going to avoid the moody prick and go about my night. Happy i didnt drink today.
Haha yeah I know the feels! I don’t get as much time as I’d like to do my hobby stuff, I normally crochet while watching tv at the end of the day if I’m not dead tired, and I take mine to my sons footy training and crochet in the car (so lame hahaha). It’s really relaxing tho.
My cousin graduated. I’m happy for him. My whole family was there (outside of my grandpa). Everyone was giving him so many hugs and they all were talking about how proud they were
I just feel awful. I got one hug from my grandpa and I have literally never heard my family say they’re proud of me. I graduated last year. I just don’t understand why I’m the black sheep of the family. I don’t know what happened that I’m so different and left out.
You are doing great and I am proud of you! I hope you will be proud of yourself too! Sometimes families are just strange and do hurtful things… I am sorry xoxo
#Day 1347
Feeling a bit better day by day. This morning was the first since 11 days I could get out of bed without cursing out of pain Still having some but is was doable! Progress!!
I try to walk short distances every day to help my body heal and get back my strenght. My neighbour offered me her companionship and I’m going to accept it. I do not trust my body well enough to walk alone yet.
My youngest went to his first festival of 3 days with a friend. He’s 19 years old. We talked about alcohol and stuff before he went. I will never have a “normal” opinion about alcohol ever again. I rather have my kids sober like me because my own addiction. But I know I cannot demand such a thing. I hope he’s careful and I hope he has loads of fun. We talked and more I cannot do.
No matter defeat, no matter victory, no matter Champions League final, no matter how nervous I am, I am going to be sober, I am not going to drink alcohol before and after the match like other times.
This is going to be my first Champions League final with sparkling water, and I am very proud of it.
Checking in, 568 days no alcohol. I relapsed on smoking after almost 3 months. Sometimes it’s overwhelming on how many fields should we pay attention not to slip back into old habits, constantly monitoring if it’s an escape or is it within the normal scale. Especially with the normal scale being a lot tighter for us. It’s still difficult for me to focus on building instead of just avoiding destruction.
Checking in at the top of day 42, a little late today, its been a busy day, but good day. Went to work a little this morning while my daughter went horseback riding with a friend of hers. Then I did a little shopping. Picked up my kiddo, and then went and saw the new Bobs Burgers movie! We’ve been waiting on that movie to come out for a couple years now, and was not disappointed. After the movie, we packed my kiddos bag and I dropped her off to spend a month with her dad. It’s always a bummer time of the year when he gets her for such a large chunk of time, but its important that she has that time with her dad so I will learn to get over it. Sober. I plan on taking this month to focus on beginning some kind of exercise routine at the gym, and begin that new habit. I pay for the membership, may as well use the damn thing lol. Plus it will be a good distraction from not having my little broke best friend around haha. Goodnight all!
I’m also proud of you for not doing it. I know the feeling of being the outsider or being the black sheep in the family. It is heavy. But I’ve resigned myself to it. It is mainly the shortcomings of those people, the lack of insight, prejudices, and not wanting to make the effort to hear your story. Now they don’t need to hear that. But in many cases this is not your fault so please try to rise above it. You did a good job!
Still having some but is was doable! Progress!! 
