It really is overwhelming how vigilant you have to be not to slip back into those habits. It’s almost exhausting sometimes. I quit smoking for 4 years and one day out of the blue picked one up and haven’t been able to quit them again since. I guess we can really never let our guard down.
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Hey all, checking in on day 713. I hope everybody has a good one!
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Day 10 checking in!
Super sleepy, was a good sober Friday. Had some friends call that were super drunk and going raving. Was more obnoxious than triggering lol. That’s p much it!
Thanks guys, good luck out there, giving you all good vibes!
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I’ll have to check to see what’s on.
Hi everyone, just a quick message to say hi.
Tonight will be 13 days… getting close to that fortnight mark !!
It’s pretty warm here today, but I’ve only spent half the day working, so I can’t complain. Working 7 days a week gets to be tiring sometimes, but you would think that I would be used to it after nearly 25 years ! 
Oh well, there’s always tomorrow.
Have a good day, everyone.
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Checking in day 4. Beautiful out in the northeast part of PA today. Took the kiddos to breakfast and probably just get some stuff done around house that I been putting off. Have a good day people.
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Day 715 clean and sober today. Rough couple of days but I surprisingly feel back on point this morning. Last weekend of night shift, starting days next Wednesday. Have an amazing day everyone, love you guys!!! 
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Here checking in , so far so good and thinking about all time that has past.
Already years ago I bought tickets for a festival which was cancelled two times due to covid and this weekend it finally was time to liquidate the ticket but now I’m older, a lot happened and this was certainly not the moment to visit a big festival like “intents” …
The tickets I gave away to a couple of nearly strangers who I see walking sometimes and in the end it gave me a bundle of joy to see the surprised faces of a couple that otherwise probably would never had the chance to go to a festival like that and for me it is just the right choice at the right time.
I spended some time writing instead and below is the translated result.
I hope it makes any sense to ya’ll but I felt like sharing it.
I’m struggling with a lot but I’m relentless clinging on the bright light that is shining in the future I see myself in.
A lot still has to be done and fears to be conquered but I find strength in the story’s I read here on the forum that you all share and I find the courage in myself back again by just reading some of them and that makes me feel blessed and thankful.
I tried to translate my Dutch jiberish scribbles into English and after an hour of doubt I’m just going to post it anyway.
I wish you all a sober and safe weekend!
and for those reading this post entirely i hope it makes sense in what way whatsoever.
Bless and take care peopz
A light of shadow-tones
blinking and flickering,
the lights of gray shades are untouchable heavy~
like jet-black smoke vapors clinging
to the suffocating worldviews.
Like magnets playing in a wealth of harp fingers, making one forget the notes ~ cleaved by strings of unexposed danger…
That dreams are on the map ~
and before the dish the star chef only
tender by passing, judging breath’s,
tears squeezed gadgets and fits ~
slow down-the days to smashed glasses that were rather full of emotions…
their light~ unworn silk-heavy ~ soft innocence preserving statements and also in “higher” sounding professions the yet underexposed screaming repetitions of evil marinades,- chocolate pralinades and the seafood as a salty witness is the judge inquired about the shadow side of the unfinished shards -the lustily wandering tormented mountains of a ~~
never more waltzing dance which ashore is cracking its storm of notes in its own reflection without prisms standing still in the center of the eye,
knocked off and knocked away and is silent for a while
it is dry for a while
and it’s deaf for a while
just believe that there’s
courtesy in this rain~archery bow
And there stood the righteousness…
in disbelief
It seems there’s joy behind walls of greeve
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Nice post. Good on ya. Be well.
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Big up my dear friend, long time no speak but it does make my day to see your numbers !
Proud at you Paul
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Very nice post.
Dankjewel voor het delen 
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cheers mate still fighting the good fight 
Champions league final tonight so get a non alcoholic lager for old times sake. Even after approaching 2 years some things in life I still associate with the taste of beer. Does that mean I’m miserable and want to get drunk, Not at all, it means I’m finally in control of what I consume. Somedays it’s lemonade, Somedays it’s cherryade, tonight for 90 minutes it’s lagerade with the ability to stop and not crave more. How’s things your end?
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Hey guys. So I relapsed again yesterday. Don’t what is happening but its been a very rough week for me.
I did not want to checkin but I need to stay accountable to you guys. I feel that I have been taking you for granted as I have been missing several checkins. I just want to let you guys know that I am so grateful to be here. You helped me gain confidence in attempting to quit PMO.
Being here helped me surpass the 1 month mark so easily which was very difficult for me.
I am trying to learn from this week, journaling also. I took inspiration from you guys to not give up. So thank you.
I will not be a victim of life. I chose to do PMO even if it is painful to accept that decision. And that gives me control for my decisions.
I will give it all to make the decision to stay sober everytime I am faced with difficulty.
So here I am again for day 1.
Thanks for reading.
Have a nice day
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So many examples on here about the power never giving in and working with others can have. Nobody got here by accident and nobody got sober by accident. Keep doing the things that work but as you have just relapsed re evaluate what does and doesn’t work. The Definition of insanity is doing the same things and expecting a different result.
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Morning Check in
Day 103
Morning TS fam! Happy Saturday! I have a hell of a lot of catching up to do on here. Really, really hoping everyone is good! It’s been a busy couple of days. I’m not working today cuz hubby has to tattoo so I get to do some shopping and relax. Only have to work tomorrow which is kind of nice. I’m slowly getting my motivation and energy back. I’ve really been trying to cut back on the caffeine. But my eating hasnt been the greatest 
I’m excited to be getting back to the gym tho on Monday. My back is feeling better. I think I was using too much weight and putting too much pressure on my back. I know now tho. And recovery wise, things are good! I do have the odd urge to use but I look at where my life is today and I don’t want to lose it. And I know that if I use any substance, it goes all downhill real fast!
Hope everyone has an addiction free day!
Hugs 
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That’s great to hear my friend, and I believe you’ve got this !
Did you know Virgil started at my hometown FC ? As did Robben , against we go I’ve played when I was like 8 years old… And believe me… The young bastard was already fast back then 
Here I’m in recovery mode of operation nr ? But they did a great job and it seems I can start looking forward.
I’ll get you up to speed somewhere in the comming days but I did have to reset my cigarettes and prescription drugs… But he , that’s life. I also had a couple of suicidal episodes and atm I’m just struggling to get it all together and try to get my body in good health and it troubles me that I can’t really take care of my body the way I want and should but thanks to @DLS and @Mno amongst others I found my way back to the ts forum because I couldn’t find the courage to get back due to a feeling that I let people down by just disappearing and in my depression just shutter down all contacts, also in my personal life.
Now loneliness and isolation is still a bit of a bitch but I’m crawling out.
More to come , and I will root for the reds as well tonight
My day just got a bit better by your post and @LaDyLooNtje 's one also !
Stay safe and enjoy the weekend
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Day 53 today without a substance
Layin in bed with my amazing girlfriend be4 work
Today is our 3 month anniversary
Tough morning but we toughed it out
I took a much needed nap
Got home at midnight and working till midnight tonight
I love my girlfriend and I love my job
Stay strong everyone
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I guess that’s wassup
WE (TS) are warriors
I just discovered this song, if you have a minute… It’s worth the listening
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“Nobody got sober by accedent”
I love that
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